


Unexpected Passengers

by BoldBeverly



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Children, F/M, Romance, Seduction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-16 04:20:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 45,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28575897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BoldBeverly/pseuds/BoldBeverly
Summary: What if Wesley wasn't Beverly Crusher's only child when she reported to the Enterprise D? How will Jean-Luc Picard handle the news of his daughter? How will they work through it together? How will the rest of the Enterprise crew react? (I'm still adding to this story,  not sure how long it will end up being.)
Relationships: Beverly Crusher/Jean-Luc Picard, William Riker/Deanna Troi
Comments: 22
Kudos: 47





	1. Chapter 1

ENTERPRISE BRIDGE

Captain Jean-Luc Picard had been dreading this moment for weeks, ever since it became clear that Dr. Beverly Crusher was going to be assigned to the Enterprise as his Chief Medical Officer whether he wanted her there or not. 

Dr. Crusher was a stunning woman with vivid auburn hair, creamy skin and long dancer’s legs. Pair that up with a keen intellect, quick-wit and deeply held principles and she was the kind of woman that men adored but were terrified of actually possessing. 

When she strode onto the bridge her posture broadcast that she was aware of the challenge that awaited her. And that she was ready for it, possibly even relished it. Her chin was held high and her eyes were shining with deep strength borne of someone who has consistently overcome obstacles that would have felled others. 

“Dr. Beverly Crusher reporting as ordered, sir,” she said, coming to stand before Captain Jean-Luc Picard. 

“Welcome aboard Doctor. We are glad to have you. This is my first officer, William Riker,” Picard said. 

“We met at Farpoint Station, sir,” Will intoned. “I very much enjoyed the doctor and her children, a great addition to our crew.” Will smiled in that friendly way that put people at ease around the tall man. His gregarious nature was clearly a counterpoint to the serious captain. 

As he introduced Counselor Deanna Troi, the counselor found herself awash in feelings of anxiety, anger and deep hurt. It was almost as overwhelming as her earlier trip to Farpoint Station. Troi managed a smile and wondered if at some point she and this striking woman could be friends. As the only two women on the senior staff, they would be spending a lot of time together. 

Once the captain had finished introducing Dr. Crusher to the staff he turned and asked her, “Would you join me in my ready room?” 

She nodded and followed him into the office. Willing herself to relax she wandered over to look at the book displayed in the corner, “Still Shakespeare?” she asked, peering down at the title. 

“Yes, Please have a seat Doctor,” he said gesturing at the chair across from the desk. 

She sat, perched on the end of her chair, her heart rate increasing a bit as she looked up to see him tapping away at a file on his PADD. She’d wondered if he’d notice, if this moment of reckoning would come sooner or later. It appeared that it would be sooner which she supposed was just as well, might as well get things out in the open. 

“I was a bit surprised when I saw your name on my duty roster Doctor.”

“Why, you don’t think I’m qualified for the position?” she challenged. 

“On the contrary, your record is exemplary and your expertise with diverse species would be an asset to any starship.”

“Then why?” She was not going to make this easy for him. 

“I didn’t think you would want me as your commanding officer.”

“I think I can handle it. The opportunity was too good to pass up for my career and Wes shares his father’s fascination with space travel.”

“Now that you mention it, I found the family section of your record particularly intriguing,” he said, steepling his fingers and peering over them at her. 

“Did you?” she asked feigning ignorance. “I wouldn’t think my personal life was all that remarkable.” She kept her tone level and met his gaze directly, those blue eyes clearly challenging him. 

He knew then that he was right. Their eyes held for several seconds, neither backing down. “Are you going to make me ask you?” His voice was clipped and harsh. 

“Yes,” she said simply. 

“Yes, what?” he ground out. 

“Yes, I’m going to make you ask me,” she countered, straightening her back as though preparing for a physical assault. 

“Damnit Beverly, is she my daughter?” His voice shook with barely restrained emotion.

“Yes.” It cost her, but her voice remained steady, her eyes searing into his. 

“How could you? How could you not tell me?” His voice shook with anger.

“You made your position very clear Jean-Luc when you practically ran out that morning. It was obvious that you regretted what had happened and couldn’t wait to get away.” She spoke clearly and showed little emotion outwardly but her knuckles were white where she gripped the arms of the chair. 

“You were my best friend’s widow. It shouldn’t have happened,” he gritted out. 

“Don’t give me that,” she spat back. “Jack had been gone over a year Jean-Luc. This wasn't about him, it was about us, it was about me.”

“I took advantage of you, I should have known better,” he said, rubbing his forehead. 

“Took advantage of me? Do you know me at all? Do you really think I did anything I didn’t want to do?” she countered. 

Feeling as though this line of discussion was not in his best interest, the captain tried to turn the conversation. “Regardless, once you knew you were pregnant, how could you not tell me?”

“I sent you two messages the week after you left, you didn’t respond. I knew that you weren’t interested in family life, you’d already rejected me, once I knew, why would I possibly subject myself to you? Why would I subject my child to your rejection? It was my decision and my responsibility,” she countered her voice rising. 

“I had a right to know,” he said, rising from his seat. 

“Well now you do,” she said as she too stood up “and it’s up to you to decide what to do about it. You know where to find us.” She headed for the door, her vibrant hair swinging. 

The doors opened just as PIcard growled. “We aren’t finished,” smacking his hand onto the desk. His legendary control was faltering and he didn’t like that feeling at all. 

“I am!” Her eyes were flashing as she stalked onto the bridge, head held high, and up to the turbolift. 

Riker and Troi having caught only the last bit of the conversation exchanged meaningful glances.

“We’re not the only ones with a past around here,” Riker stated in a low voice that only she could hear. They watched to see if the captain would emerge but his doors stayed shut for the next few hours.


	2. Chapter f2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Riker and Troi speculate about the fight between the captain and the doctor.

TEN-FORWARD

Commander William Riker sat at a high top table with Counselor Deanna Troi as they awaited their dinner. They had decided that they needed to clear the air between them and figure out how to work together in spite of their past relationship. 

Bringing up their own issues was daunting so Troi led with her observations of their fellow officers. “That scene between the captain and Dr. Crusher was surprising.”

“I met her and her children at Farpoint and Wesley, her son, told me that Captain Picard had brought his father’s body home. I looked up his service record and apparently Lt. Jack Crusher died under Picard’s command when he was captain of the Stargazer.”

“To be a widow with young children in Starfleet can’t have been easy,” Troi speculated. “But you’d think if she was uncomfortable serving with Picard she wouldn’t have taken the posting.”

“The doctor called him ‘Jean-Luc’ when she spoke of him and she didn’t seem angry at Farpoint, but apparently something happened,” Riker offered. 

“How old are her children?” Troi asked. Starships with children and spouses aboard were a new concept but Troi was an advocate, believing that keeping families together would benefit Starfleet and the Federation in the long run. 

“Wesley is about 14, very gregarious, wanted to talk about ALL the details of the Enterprise. I almost thought he had the specs memorized the way he talked. Her daughter, Susannah, is maybe 8 or 9. She has her mother’s hair and is much quieter than her brother. She was actually carrying around a paper book and trying to read it when she thought she could get away with it. They seem like nice kids.”

“I’m actually looking forward to the opportunity to work with families on the ship,” Troi said.

“The captain isn’t,” Riker followed up. “He admitted to me that he is uncomfortable around children and asked me to take the lead with our younger crew members.”

“Maybe their disagreement had something to do with that,” Deanna speculated. “Hopefully they will find a comfortable working relationship, given the exciting start to this mission I have a feeling we are going to have to all work together.”

Seeing the segway, Riker said, “We can do that can’t we? Work together?”

“Of course we can Will. We are both professionals,” she assured him. Once she had recovered from the initial shock of his presence, she had determined that she would do what was necessary to set her personal hurts aside and make the most of this opportunity. 

“Good. I can’t think of a more talented woman to serve with,” Riker affirmed.

Thankfully at that moment they were interrupted by the delivery of their meals and their conversation turned to discussion of other crew members and of course to their encounter with Q.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picard tries to smooth things over with Dr. Crusher, how will she respond?

DR. CRUSHER’S OFFICE

Three days later Captain Picard walked cautiously into the Chief Medical Officer’s domain. He surveyed the busy pace of a well-organized sickbay. A small child was being treated for a bruise by a nurse and another crew member was completing intake paperwork on a PADD for what the captain assumed was the necessary physical required of new crew members. 

He was uncomfortably reminded of the fact that he would need to report for his own physical soon and was dubious as to how that would go under the supervision of his new CMO. Her position was the only one on the Enterprise that had privileges that could, under the right circumstances, exceed his own. While he had every faith in Dr. Crusher’s professionalism, it still made him slightly uneasy. The vulnerability of having to discuss his own medical history added to his discomfort. 

He saw her through the glass doors of her office, she was sitting in her chair, one long leg drawn up on the seat next to her while she peered at a screen. She absently tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear and he was momentarily reminded of how that same hair had looked spread out on the pillow while she slept. He vaguely wondered if he would ever get used to her beauty. He blinked, took a breath and started forward, the door closing behind him. 

She looked up as he entered her office, flicked him a glance, held up a finger and continued typing for a few seconds before putting the PADD down, a clear sign that she was not going to be intimidated by him. For a man who was used to all activity ceasing at his approach this was slightly unnerving. 

She gestured towards the chair and he sat. “What can I do for you captain?” she asked. 

“Doctor, I wanted to make it clear that you are a valued member of my crew and that I am fully prepared to work with you in the best interests of this ship.” 

“Thank you for the vote of confidence,” she said drolly. She waited for him to continue but when he didn’t, she asked, “Are we going to keep this strictly professional? Are you intending to pretend that Susannah is simply my child? You can do that if you want, but I would prefer to know your intentions,” Crusher said. 

Her forthright manner had always appealed to him but this statement made him feel small and awkward. “That is not what I said,” he snapped. 

She stared at him, waving her hand in a gesture that invited him to continue. 

“Beverly, I do want to get to know my ...daughter, to be friends with you and Wesley,” he spoke calmly now, bringing his formidable control to the forefront. 

There, he had said it The word ”daughter” had rolled awkwardly off his tongue but he’d gotten it out. He’d pulled up her picture in the crew database as soon as he’d seen the notes in Beverly’s file and had felt his world shift. At first glance she looked like her mother, the same flame red hair and high cheekbones, but her eyes, they were his eyes and the faint cleft in her chin was a dead giveaway. He couldn’t explain the feelings that she stirred in him. He’d never wanted children, or he’d never thought he did but when he looked at her he felt a surge of pride and something else he couldn’t describe. 

He spied a hologram of the three of them on Beverly’s desk and he was drawn to it, unthinkingly turning it towards himself for a better look. They were formally attired, Beverly in a dress of dark blue silk and Susannah in one a few shades lighter, with Wesley in a dark sweater, but what struck him aside from their beauty was clear happiness in their smiles. 

Seeing the look on his face as he gazed at this picture of his daughter with a combination of awe and sadness, put a serious chink in Beverly’s anger. She had come to the Enterprise knowing that she would have to face him, face this, but she had thought it was time. She’d thought she had her own emotions under control but the hurt and anger had been simmering right there under the surface. 

He wasn’t wrong in saying that he deserved to know and to be involved and this move was that chance. If he’d rejected it she would have found a way to move on but she’d known she owed it to her daughter to take the chance. Seeing him now, she knew that she would do whatever it took to do right by her daughter and to let them build a relationship. 

“Would you like to come to dinner Friday? The kids know that we were....friends so it wouldn’t be that strange.” The offer rolled off her tongue before she could think about it too deeply, her mother’s heart wanting to ease the suffering she saw in his eyes. 

“That would be nice,” he replied. “What time do you eat, with the children’s bedtimes and all?” he asked. 

“1830 will work,” she told him.

He nodded, still staring at the hologram. 

“That was taken last year on our vacation to Pacifica. We splurged and bought tickets to an old Broadway show, Beauty and the Beast, as the book is one of Susannah’s favorites,” Beverly offered. 

“You all look very happy,” he said, failing to keep the wistfulness from his voice. 

“We were, we are,” she said. “We have a good life Jean-Luc and I’m confident that the kids will adapt well to life on the Enterprise.” Her opinion of how they would adapt to him was left unsaid. 

He took a breath and rose from the chair. “I’ll see you on Friday.”

“Actually you will see me at the staff meeting before that,” she joked.

“Quite right,” he said, a small smile appearing. With that he nodded and was gone. 

Once she saw the doors close behind him, Beverly allowed herself a deep breath and she hugged her knee to her chest. She’d gone into this with her eyes open but it still promised to be a bumpy ride.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picard prepares for dinner with the Crusher family.

OBSERVATION LOUNGE

The staff meeting was wrapping up, team members clear on their duties for their next mission to Arvalla IV to replenish colonist’s supplies on the planet. 

“A moment doctor,” the captain called as the group exited. 

Crusher nodded and hung back and while the others filed out. She wondered if he was going to back out of dinner and she steeled herself for the conversation. 

“Doctor, it has been my experience that when I meet with new people it is best to have some background knowledge, some common ground upon which to make conversation. Can you tell me about Wesley and Susannah? What are they interested in? I reviewed their school records and it seems as though Wesley excels at maths and engineering but Susannah is still pursuing a grammar school curriculum so that didn’t give me any real information.”

She peered at him in fascination. A small laugh escaped. “Jean-Luc, are you approaching dinner with my children in the same way you would a diplomatic negotiation?”

He bristled and she saw his back straighten. “I hadn’t thought of it like that. It just seemed wise to...I don’t know Beverly! I’ve never been good with children and it is important to me that…” he turned his flustered and troubled eyes to her. 

“Okay, okay, it’s actually not a terrible idea, it was just surprising,” she said. “Wesley does indeed love understanding how things work. Honestly, he is a genius at maths and physics, and I don’t say that just as a parent but from an actual objective analysis of his abilities. In fact, his intelligence makes him awkward with his peers. He does better with adults to an extent but he is truly oblivious to the fact that many people have no idea what he is talking about. He has a good heart and he loves to learn but he can be impetuous and single-minded.” She gave him a half-grin of mock apology, “I think he may know more about the Enterprise than some of the engineering staff. I have a suspicion that he may have accessed non-public information about the schematics even!” She shook her head and shrugged, acknowledging parental honesty that combines pride and exasperation. 

“Susannah is really the more complicated one. She’s quiet at first but in a group of children she will become the leader, even if there are older children. She has an air of authority and conviction that the other kids respond to. Susannah is smart but her real gift is that she reads people well and once she is comfortable around them she is a dynamic personality. She loves to read, she even likes paper books when we can find them. Even at her age she is a strong writer and has a good analytical mind for literature and she loves history. 

In short, neither appears poised to follow in my footsteps in the medical profession!” she quipped. 

Picard nodded seriously. He wanted to ask more but wasn’t sure what to say. “Thank you. I am looking forward to dinner tonight,” his voice quiet. 

Knowing she was being dismissed, Beverly rose and headed towards the door. Just as she exited she turned and said, “Me too.”

CRUSHER QUARTERS

As usual, Beverly was running behind. She’d hoped to have a few minutes to brush her hair and refresh her makeup but a last-minute patient had delayed her return. Trying to keep two kids on schedule was always a chore, and she felt like she was still remembering where everything was in their cabin. She was just handing the kids the plates and silverware when the bell chimed. She sighed and said, “Come.” 

Captain Picard stepped into the cabin taking in the random detritus that was family life; a backpack next to the couch, a tablet stashed on a table and a book laying open on the coffee table. Somehow these little messes that he never would have tolerated in his cabin were welcoming. He glanced to his right to see the kids setting the table, bantering as siblings do, good-naturedly correcting each other’s placement of the items. 

To his left he saw Beverly and it took real self control to simply smile at her. She was wearing black slacks, a deep green shirt and, he noticed her feet were bare but her toes were painted a deep pink. For some reason the thought of this busy, dedicated, practical woman with pink toenails moved something in him. 

She approached him and guided him over to the table. “Kids, say hello to Captain Picard.” 

They turned to look at him, Wesley stepping right over and holding out his hand. “Welcome Captain. I’m so glad that you came to dinner. When mom told us I thought for sure you would be too busy.” 

“One should never be too busy for old friends,” Picard countered smoothly. He was realizing that he would need all his diplomatic skills and control to get through the evening. He turned to Susannah and had to refrain from swallowing audibly when she turned those familiar hazel eyes to him. 

“Hello,” she said. It wasn’t shy exactly but neither was it warm. It was clear that she was going to study him and reserve judgment. Picard was sure he had never been so intimidated before, but he supposed never had anyone’s opinion mattered so much before either. 

Beverly sensed the situation and reached over to fetch the chicken, rice and vegetable dishes she had chosen for dinner. Serving utensils were placed in each bowl so that everyone could serve themselves. She directed everyone to sit, positioning herself across from the captain with the children flanking them. 

Beverly started the conversation rolling by asking the kids about their day at school and their new classmates. They had lived on starbases before but the diversity of species was greater on the Enterprise than what they had experienced so they discussed many of their new shipmates, Beverly and Jean-Luc adding what they knew about the various aliens among them. 

Picard listened carefully and engaged Susannah in a conversation about the novel they were reading in her literature course. Asked about her books, Susannah opened up and the two found common ground in discussing the novels of JRR Tolkien and C.S. Lewis. 

If there was the slightest lull in the conversation, Wesley could be counted on to make an inquiry about the Enterprise and ship operations. At 2000 Wes left to meet some of the other teens he had met on board. His mom had asked him not to mention the captain’s visit. It was clear to Wes that they were keeping their relationship with the captain private, although he wasn’t really sure why. 

After Wes left, Beverly turned to Picard, “See they don’t bite, you did fine.”

One corner of his mouth turned up in a small smile. “They are delightful children,” he complimented her, “and I enjoyed the evening very much, far more than I expected. I hope we can do it again soon.”

“Friday?” she offered before she knew what she was saying. 

He looked slightly surprised but readily agreed.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edpisode Tag for Symbiosis.

EPISODE TAG FOR SYMBIOSIS   
TURBOLIFT

“Jean-Luc, without telling them about the addiction I can give them some assistance in dealing with the withdrawal symptoms.”

“We can’t Beverly, the Prime Directive is clear here,” he said. She could tell he wasn’t pleased with this but was resolute.

“You were willing to give them the technology to fix their ships but not this? How is that different?” she asked. 

“The technology wasn’t new to them, but this knowledge would be,” he countered. He had ultimately decided against providing the repair parts as well, partly because of Dr. Crusher’s advocacy but he knew that she probably wouldn’t see beyond their suffering to value that choice. 

“Jean-Luc, their whole world is suffering, children are suffering. They are born addicted! How would you feel if Susannah had to face this?” she asked, desperation and outrage in her voice. 

He rubbed his hands over his face. “Doctor, I understand and I wish that I could change it, but I can’t.” 

“I can teach them some strategies for managing the pain, the symptoms without medication and without telling them about the addiction,” she pleaded. 

“Write up some of your suggestions and I will take a look. We are skirting a fine line here, Doctor.”

“I understand the value of the Prime Directive in a lot of circumstances but this is essentially slavery. It is being accomplished through chemical means, but it is still enslavement,” she insisted. 

“I will look at what you come up with and see what I can do,” Picard reiterated. Command was rarely easy but there were times where it felt like the decisions were untenable, especially when remaining true to the Prime Directive meant turning a blind eye to such atrocious behavior and disappointing someone he cared about.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wes is suspicious.

CRUSHER QUARTERS  
They had developed a pattern of Captain Picard coming to dinner twice a week, usually Tuesday and Fridays as long as his schedule allowed and both children were now comfortable with him. 

Following what Beverly had thought was a nice dinner one Tuesday after they had been on the Enterprise almost two months, Wesley came back out into the living area after Susannah had gone to bed and Picard had departed. “Mom, can I ask you something?”

Beverly set down the PADD containing the medical journal she had been reviewing and turned her attention to her son. “Of course.”

“Promise you won’t get mad?” he asked, his voice and body language communicating his trepidation. 

“Wesley, you know you can talk to me about anything,” she told him, patting the spot next to her on the sofa. 

“Captain Picard doesn’t have dinner with other families does he?”

“Not that I know of,” she told him “but it is hard to be the captain of a starship and have relationships sometimes. Being their boss can make it complicated, especially because he sometimes has to order people to do things that are unpleasant or dangerous.”

“Like Dad?” Wesley asked quietly. 

“Yes. Wes, I know that he suffered greatly because of that. He loved your Dad. In some ways, I think he was a different man before your Dad’s death. I didn’t serve with him, but he seems more reserved than he used to be. Captain Picard actually spent a lot of time with our family before that so we’d already developed a...friendship, before he became my commanding officer.” 

“I remember him coming around when Dad died and then did he come after that?” Wesley asked with the look of someone who is trying to clarify a vague memory. 

“Yes, he did. He brought Dad’s body back to Earth and even went with me to see it. I know that sounds morbid but I needed to do it and he accompanied me even though it was hard. He came by on a shore leave after that as well,” she acknowledged. She knew the time was drawing near when it would all come out, and she wouldn’t lie to her children. 

Wesley nodded and then looked at her, his confused emotions obvious. “It’s just that I’ve noticed that Susannah and Captain Picard...well, they sort of look alike. They have the same expression sometimes, especially when they are listening to someone intently. And her eyes are the same color as his, they look like his. Is Captain Picard..is he...well, is he her father?”

Beverly took a deep breath and let it shudder out. “Yes,” she said, trying not to let herself get choked up. 

“Why wasn’t he around? Didn’t he want to be a father?” he asked with the innocence of youth. To him, things were black or white and understanding those shades of gray which colored the lives of adults was going to be hard. 

“It’s complicated, Wes and that part of the story is between Jean-Luc and I. Please don’t tell your sister any of this. I’ll talk to the captain because we’ll need to tell her together,” she said tears began to pool in her eyes. 

“I’m sorry Mom, I shouldn’t have said anything. I didn’t mean to upset you,” Wesley said, clearly uncomfortable with his mom’s distress. She was the strongest person he knew and he didn’t like to see her struggle. 

“It was going to come out sooner or later Wes. Part of the reason we came to Enterprise was to give them the chance at a relationship,” she told him. “I’m not upset with you, please don’t think that.” 

She stood up and hugged him. “I love you and your sister more than anything. I wish I could protect you from everything, but I can’t. But I know this, no matter what happens, we will get through it together. Now,” she said planting a kiss on his forehead, “go to bed and get some sleep. I seem to remember that you have a particle physics test tomorrow.”

“I love you too, Mom,” Wes said as he trotted off to bed.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly and Jean-Luc need to talk to their daughter.

CAPTAIN’S READY ROOM 

Captain Picard was reviewing logistics for their upcoming assignment when his door chimed. He looked up as he bid his caller entrance. A small ghost of a smile appeared as he sighted his Chief Medical Officer. 

“Doctor?” he inquired. 

She waited until the door had shut firmly behind her before she sat down. “Jean-Luc, Wesley knows,” she said heavily. 

Jean-Luc nodded. “I understand why you told him.”

“I didn’t tell him. He asked me, or rather told me. He said that Susannah sometimes has expressions that look like yours and that you share the same eyes.” Beverly’s voice betrayed her nervousness. 

Picard nodded as he had observed these same things in his daughter and he knew it wouldn’t be a secret forever, at least from those who mattered. “Beverly he is a very smart and observant young man and from what I’ve gathered hosting a man at your dinner table regularly hasn’t been commonplace,” a fact which he tried hard not to be secretly pleased about. 

“I suppose. I knew that when we came here it would all come out eventually and I thought I was prepared but….now that it’s happening it’s hard,” she admitted. 

While they had worked to develop both a professional relationship and a personal one in front of the children, they had never really discussed what had precipitated all of this. They both knew that they would, but neither was yet ready to undertake that emotional unpacking. 

“We need to tell Susannah, “ she said. 

He saw in her eyes that this troubled her. He walked around from behind the desk, lightly took her hand and led her to the couch. “Beverly, we will get through this. I’m proud to have her as my daughter as she is a wonderful young lady and you’ve done a good job with her.”

“Except for the part where I kept her from her father for nine years. I’m afraid she will resent me and it’s not wrong for her to feel that way.”

“As you told me when you came aboard, it is what it is and we just have to deal with it,” he was afraid that this had come out a bit harshly but Beverly had never been cowed by his directness and she wasn’t now. She simply nodded in agreement. 

“We can talk about it at dinner on Friday, that way the kids don’t have school in the morning to consider.” He nodded in agreement. She took a deep breath, rose and exited. 

Jean-Luc allowed himself another few minutes to process what she had said and to think about what might happen, good and bad when they revealed their secrets to their daughter. 

CRUSHER QUARTERS

Beverly had chosen a meal of what she thought of as comfort food, balsamic chicken with roasted tomatoes, mashed potatoes and green beans topped with bacon for dinner. She even brought out a plate of warm chocolate chip cookies for dessert. Once the table had been cleared she asked them to head into the family room. 

She took a seat on the couch next to Susannah, Jean-Luc on her other side. Wesley had known what was happening and he ensconced himself in a chair facing the group.

“Susannah, we need to talk about something important,” Beverly started. “It’s about your father.”

“My father?” she asked with great surprise. “You’ve never wanted to talk about him before.”

“It wasn’t the right time before,” she replied, “but now you need to know. Susannah, Captain Picard, Jean-Luc, is your father.”

“What???” she exclaimed, looking from one parent to the other in confusion. 

“Honey, one of the reasons we came to the Enterprise was that I wanted to give you the chance to know each other but I thought it best for you to have a relationship first so that he wasn’t a stranger when you found out.”

“If you’re my father why haven’t you been around before? Didn’t you want me?” she asked, turning her back to her mother to look at Jean-Luc. 

Children had a way of getting to the heart of the matter, even when it was painful. “I didn’t know about you until you arrived on the Enterprise,” he said carefully. “Now that I do, I very much want to be a part of your life.”

“You didn’t tell him?” she shot accusingly at her mother. 

Beverly took a deep breath, she had expected this but the words still cut her. “At the time, I thought it was the right choice for us.”

“Why?” she asked. 

Beverly was formulating a response when Jean-Luc spoke up. “Susannah, back then my job took me away for months, even years at a time and your mother thought it best that you have a stable family.”

“But she didn’t even tell you, didn’t ask you if you wanted to see me?”

“It was complicated,” Beverly said, finding her voice. “Your father and I hadn’t discussed children and we weren’t in a serious relationship. Honestly, the details of that are between us, but the important thing is that we are all here now and that we love you.”

“But I didn’t have a dad! He didn’t get to come to my birthday parties or play games with me or read books with me,” Susannah said, tears sliding down her face. Beverly brushed them off and pulled her daughter to her chest, stroking her hair. 

Tears glittered in Beverly’s eyes but she held them back. “I know and maybe I made a mistake but I really thought it was best at the time.” 

Susannah pulled away, not wanting her mother’s comfort. She turned back to Jean-Luc, “Do you think she did the right thing? Do you think it was fair?”

“I think that this is a very hard thing to understand and that it is difficult for everyone but being angry at your mother won’t change what has happened,” he was drawing on his best diplomatic skills to try and calm the situation. “I’m here now and we can do all those things and more. I can teach you to ride horses on the holodeck and help you with your homework as we’ve been doing.” 

He wanted Susannah to know he loved her and wanted her but he knew that he bore some responsibility for the way he had treated Beverly. He knew that adding his anger to the situation wouldn’t help. 

Wesley had been observing quietly but now moved to sit on the floor in front of his sister. He reached up and took her hands in his. “Susannah, Mom and the captain love you and that’s what’s important,” he said. 

Susannah still looked overwhelmed, angry and sad. “Are we going to tell everyone? Is my last name going to be Picard? she asked. 

“Honey, for now I think we should keep this between us. People can be cruel and I want you to be comfortable with this before we have to deal with anyone else,” Beverly said. 

“Why would people be mean? Why would it matter to them?” Susannah asked. “Why should I have to be a secret?” 

“It’s complicated. Some people like to judge other people, to find fault with their choices and their relationships. One day, when we are all ready, we can tell people. You and your father can discuss changing your name if you want,” she allowed. 

“Why can’t I just have a normal family?” Susannah cried. “It’s all your fault,” she shouted at her mother as she stood up and stalked to her bedroom, slamming the door behind her. 

Jean-Luc stood up to follow her but Beverly put a hand on his arm and shook her head. “Let her go, she needs to think. Once her temper is up you need to give her time to cool off.”

Wesley, who was so often socially awkward, looked at the adults, realized that they needed to be alone and said, “I’ll check on her and maybe I can get her to go to bed.” With that, he stood up, got a glass of water and followed his sister.

Beverly sagged against the couch, her hands fisted in the hair on top of her head. Jean-Luc watched her, unsure of what to say or do. 

“Beverly, it will be ok,” he assured her. 

She nodded but said quietly, “I think you should go now. I need some time alone too.”

Picard rose and headed for the door, before departing he turned to look at her, wishing he could take away the pain of both mother and daughter but knowing that right now, time was the only balm. He walked quietly to his own quarters, somehow feeling more alone than he ever had.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly and Jean-Luc fight about the past.

OBSERVATION LOUNGE

Jean-Luc Picard strode to the windows to gaze out at the sweeping vista of stars beyond. On every ship upon which he had served he had found a place where he could stargaze and think through troublesome thoughts. On some ships it had been an open common area where peace was had only by blocking out the noise of others but since assuming command of his own vessels he had been able to find locations that afforded a measure of privacy. On the Enterprise, this room served many functions but late at night it was empty and peaceful.

All at once he became aware of another presence in the room. He turned and was not really surprised to see Beverly in one of the chairs at the far end of the table. He was also not shocked to see that she was crying although he wished that it wasn’t so. Their evening had been emotional, one of the hardest of his life.

He walked over and took the adjacent chair. “I come here sometimes to think, it didn’t occur to me that anyone else would utilize it the same way.”

“I needed to be alone. I didn’t want one of the kids to find me crying,” she confessed. She dried her tears but her red eyes were still haunted and sad. 

“Beverly, I have negotiated with Klingons, Romulans and Cardassians and none of those experiences was as emotionally draining as tonight’s. I think I avoided children because they get under your skin in a way that isn’t easily dealt with.”

“I think you mean that they get into your heart,” she said gently.

He nodded in agreement. “We’ve hurt her, we’ve hurt each other but we had to in order to move forward. I hated to see her so….” He wasn’t even sure he could describe what emotions he thought his daughter was feeling. If she was anything like him, which he was beginning to see that she most definitely was, he anticipated that it was a range of emotions from joy to sorrow to anger.

“We never really talked about what we did, the choices we made,” he said. 

“I’m not sure I’m up to a fight tonight Jean-Luc,” Beverly said quietly. 

“Is it even a fight anymore?” he asked. 

“I don’t know. I was so hurt, so angry and for so long I thought what I did, or didn’t do was my only choice, the only way to protect my family. I’m afraid that I considered my own feelings above hers which I shouldn’t have done.”

Jean-Luc noticed that she hadn’t mentioned HIS feelings, but perhaps he had forfeited that right. He was no longer sure. 

“I know that you don’t understand why I left Beverly, and I had known the full truth, maybe I would have come back but I’m not sure that would have been the answer either.”

“I wasn’t interested in trapping you with a baby. The great moralizer Jean-Luc Picard would surely have had opinions on my raising my children alone.”

“Well you managed well-enough without me,” he said, the words coming out more harshly than he had intended. 

She gave a low sardonic laugh. “I thought I had but when she asked me those questions tonight I felt low and like I’d been unfair. I was so hurt by you. When you walked out it was….”

“Beverly, I had NO right to you, no right to be there. You were my best friend’s widow, a woman in mourning and I took advantage of you!” he gritted out as he walked back to the windows. 

The color was now rising in her cheeks, her heart rate increasing. She had indeed found her mad. “Took advantage of me? As if I were a helpless child? Is that how you see me? In case you forgot, I kissed you! I seduced you. What about that led you to believe I was being taken advantage of?”

This conversation was not going how he intended, in fact, it felt like it was spiraling out of control and Jean-Luc had the distinct impression that he was going to be the one who crashed and burned. 

“It wasn’t right,” he said, doubling down on his earlier statement. He walked back to the windows. “You deserved someone who could offer you a life, a home, not a man 20 years older than you married to his career.”

For a moment she was eerily quiet and still, then she stood up and stalked over to him. “You really have no idea how arrogant and inappropriate that statement is do you?” She accompanied this with a finger jabbed into his chest. 

He decided at this point that remaining quiet was the best course of action. 

“You DO NOT get to decide what is right for everyone else! Don’t you think I deserved a say in who was right or wrong for me, what kind of life I wanted to lead?” 

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” he said quietly.

“Didn't want to hurt me? What do you think it felt like when I woke up to an empty bed? When you ignored my messages? You didn’t think that qualified as hurting me? I thought we had something together and then you treated me like a one-night stand. You walked out and abandoned me without a backwards glance, how did you think I would feel?” She had stopped shouting and she ran an aggravated hand through her brilliant locks. Tears shone in her eyes but she refused to let them fall. 

“That was not my intention,” he maintained. He didn’t know if it was the quiet of the late night or the emotional turmoil of the day but he laid it all out. “I’d loved you for so long and I had NO right to you. When Jack died I promised myself I would never tell you, never pursue you.

I was watching you sleep and you looked so beautiful, so fragile, and Wesley came in looking for you. He wasn’t old enough to understand what was going on and I put him back to bed but it was a reminder that you belonged to someone else, that I couldn’t be a part of that.”

“Jean-Luc Picard and his infallible moral compass,” she let out a low derisive laugh. “YOU determine what is right and ethical and no one else gets a say. You CHOSE not to be a part of that,” she said, “and you did it without consulting me. THAT is the part that is unacceptable. You can’t come in here now and act like the wounded party.”

“I’m not,” he gritted out. “I’m trying to figure out how to make this,” he gestured vaguely at her and around the ship, “work. I’m trying to figure out how to be a father, how to deal with you.” 

“Deal with me?” she repeated incredulously. “What does that mean?” 

“I don’t know,” he said, forcing his eyes up to meet hers. “I suppose it means I’m not sure where I stand with you, how I feel about you.” 

“Right now Jean-Luc we have to figure out how to be co-parents, co-workers and maybe friends. I don’t think there is room for anything else,” she said, a bit sadly but resolutely. 

“You’re right, that is quite enough for now,” he agreed but somehow that left him feeling strangely empty.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly and Jean-Luc attend a concert and talk about Jack.

CRUSHER QUARTERS

Beverly was relaxing on the couch, soft music playing, reading when the door chimed. She sat up, glanced at the time and realized it was their usual dinner time. 

“Come,’ she said, rising from the sofa. As Captain Picard entered she said apologetically, “I’m sorry, I forgot to tell you that the kids are camping on the holodeck tonight.”

“Ahh,” he said, “it’s no problem, you have a busy schedule to keep up with.”

Feeling like a peace offering was in order after their fight earlier in the week, Crusher said, “There is a concert in Ten-Forward in an hour and I was thinking about going. Would you like to grab a bite and attend?” 

He considered her a moment. Part of him wanted nothing more than to spend the evening with this beautiful woman and another part was terrified of it - terrified of what the crew would think of the two of them out together, and of what spending time with her alone would do to him. However, he didn’t feel like he could refuse the olive branch she was offering. “That sounds very nice doctor,” he agreed. 

“Give me five minutes to get cleaned up and we’ll go,” she told him. 

She decided to remain in uniform but she did refresh her make-up and brush out her hair. 

“It’s not like replicating dinner is a big inconvenience but somehow eating out still feels like a luxury,” she told him as they headed into the popular crew lounge. They headed towards a table in the back, sort of tucked off in an alcove near the windows where they were less likely to attract attention. 

“Yes, although I always feel like I’m on display when I eat outside of my quarters,” he told her.

“Even in mine?” she teased.

“Perhaps especially in yours, at least those first few nights. It was quite nerve racking,” he admitted. 

“I know you think you’re not very good with children, but you’ve done very well with mine...with ours,” she said softly. 

“Well with Wesley I couldn’t get in a word edgewise to start,” he joked. “All his questions! I felt like I was being tested and was quite afraid my knowledge of the ship would not pass muster.”

“He’s so intense,” she agreed. ‘I wish I knew how to reign him in.”

“I don’t think you can or should,” Picard said. “I hear he has convinced Riker and Lt. Commander LaForge to let him help them with maintenance in Engineering, and he’s done quite well. In fact, we were discussing allowing him to serve there in some sort of internship capacity, possibly even earn some credits towards his academy studies.” 

“He would love that. What do you think of Susannah?” she asked quietly.

“You were right when you said she was the more challenging child to understand. She is very bright and her sarcastic wit - well, that may get her into trouble but it is amusing. It is interesting how many interests we share,” he offered. 

The conversation broke off as the waiter appeared to take their dinner and drink order. 

In such a public setting they turned their discussion to the ship’s current and upcoming missions, conversation flowing easily between them until it was clear that the concert was beginning. 

They moved over to take seats near the rest of the senior staff as the concert began. Beverly felt Deanna Troi watching them but forced herself to focus on the music and tamped down any emotions that might be obvious to her empathic friend. 

After the concert Picard walked her back to her quarters and found he had to fight the urge to kiss her goodnight. It seemed so natural, so right to do so. 

“Thank you for suggesting that, it was a lovely evening,” he told her. 

“The staff enjoyed seeing you out and about, you should do it a bit more often,” she told him. 

He nodded noncommittally and then it slipped out, “Perhaps if you will accompany me, then I will.” 

She smiled, “I’ll keep that in mind,” and she started to walk into her quarters, but turned, Jean-Luc can you come in? There is something we need to talk about,” she said. 

While part of her hated to mar this lovely evening, there were so few times when the children or other staff weren’t around so she felt she needed to address this now. She gestured to the living room and he sat obediently in a soft chair. 

"I think we need to talk about Jack," Beverly said. “From what you said the other night and when I first boarded, it sounds to me like you blame yourself for what happened.” 

He stared at her a long moment before replying. "He died under my command, of course, I’m responsible," he told her, his voice sounding emotionless and hollow. 

She sighed and sat down on the arm of the chair next to him. "Jean-Luc, you know that I took my bridge test before joining the Enterprise," she said, startling him with this abrupt change in subject. He nodded and she continued, "I passed my first time, and do you know why?" He shook his head, impressed because even command track candidates often needed 2-3 attempts before passing. 

She moved to take his hand and made sure he was looking into her eyes when she spoke, "Because I already knew what was required of a great commanding officer, that he put the good of the ship and the mission before a single person. I knew it because I lived it, dealt with the results and I still knew it was the right choice, the only choice. 

"Jack would never have wanted you to blame yourself. He loved being a Starfleet officer, and he loved serving with you." The tenderness in her eyes moved him and he took a deep breath to steady his own feelings. 

"I hated sending him out there. I knew it was dangerous, but I certainly didn’t anticipate the outcome. You make hundreds of decisions like that as captain, they seem routine, until they aren’t,” Picard said. 

“Jean-Luc, if you had it to do again, with only the information you had when he went out, would you do it differently? Could you?” she asked. 

“From a command perspective, no I don’t think so,” he allowed. 

“Then you need to let go of the guilt. It’s ok to grieve, to regret but this self-flagellation is unreasonable.” 

“I felt guilty about you too, about the fact that I was...attracted to you, even before.." his voice drifted off. 

"Jean-Luc, you never said or did anything inappropriate when Jack was alive that I can recall, what more can you ask of yourself?" she challenged.

"I should never have had feelings, thoughts about my best friend's wife like that," he insisted. 

"We're all human Jean-Luc, and I'll let you in on something, even married people are attracted to others sometimes - what matters is how you handle it, and you were a perfect gentleman," she said. 

"I'm not sure I can change how I feel about Jack's death that easily," he admitted. 

"I understand, but when you start beating yourself up, think about what I said. Jack is the last person who would want you to feel this way."

"What if my being happy means being with his family, with his wife?" he asked. 

"You are a part of our family. We always knew that Jack's job was dangerous and he always said that he wanted me to move on, to be happy if the worst did happen. Truthfully, I think he would find the idea of a relationship between us very entertaining. Jack always loved when I teased you, he said no one got under your skin the way I did."

"As you know now, there was good reason for that, not one I think Jack would have wanted to think about," Picard said. 

"Perhaps not then, but do you think Jack was one to hold a grudge? Do you think he would have wanted us to be apart if being together made us happy? You've stepped in as a father for Wes and I know he'd be pleased about that."

"I think his feelings about me sliding into your bed might have been a bit more mixed," he said dryly. 

She laughed. "I think any man would have initial discomfort with the idea of his wife with someone else. I wish I had understood this before it all got so complicated but I did feel we needed to clear the air. He wouldn’t want you to beat yourself up over his accidental death.” 

She kissed him softly on the cheek and stood up, a sign to him that the evening was over. 

“I promise to think about what you've said,” he agreed, “but I’m also starting to think about “us” and what that means,” he said as he caressed her face. He looked in her eyes as he placed a soft kiss on her cheek and then he turned and departed. 

As he walked back to his own quarters he thought about what she had said both about Jack and how he distanced himself from his crew. He saw now that those things were deeply connected. 

He attended shipboard functions and diplomatic gatherings only when strictly necessary, it had been that way for years. He didn’t like to think about the fact that he hadn’t always behaved that way. Before Jack Crusher’s death he had often spent off-duty time with his senior staff, playing poker or sharing a meal. After that, he had withdrawn, perhaps unconsciously at first, thinking that it was better for everyone if he were able to keep his crew at arm's length. Certainly his decisions would be less emotional, the consequences easier to bear. 

However, having his child and the woman who he was beginning to see he would love all his life turn up on his ship was exposing this facade and causing him to question who he was and who he wanted to be. 

He knew now that she had been attracted to him years before, and obviously their daughter was proof of that, but it wasn’t clear how she felt now. He could tell that the idea of a relationship was confusing to her but he thought that might change. He realized that rebuilding her trust in him was going to be a big part of that.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode Tag for Naked Now. Beverly and Jean-Luc about what happened in the Ready Room

CRUSHER’S OFFICE  
While responding to the distress signal from the SS Tsiolkovsky, the away team had managed to bring back a virus whose effect was to remove the inhibitions of those who were infected. 

In the course of her affliction, Beverly had gone to Jean-Luc’s ready room to talk to him but had found herself distracted by his physical presence and she had practically tried to seduce him right then and there. Not that he hadn’t been interested. It was clear then and in his subsequent visit to her office that he was but somehow they had managed to hold it together and she had synthesized a cure. 

Beverly now sat in her office wondering how to go about reclaiming the lab coat she had wantonly abandoned in his ready room. She needed the tricorder in the pocket as it contained some data required for her report. 

She and Jean-Luc had worked hard to create a professional relationship and a cordial one in private for the children and that display of lust risked upsetting that delicate balance. And then there was Wesley’s behavior. While in the end, he had helped saved the ship, his taking over Engineering had created the problems in the first place. 

There was nothing to do but confront the issue head-on. Maybe she would get lucky and he wouldn’t be there and she could just slip in and get it. Although it wasn’t technically correct, she could use her override code to let herself in. 

Luck was clearly not with her as Jean-Luc Picard was ensconced in the center chair when she arrived on the bridge. New tactic, she thought. She gestured at the ready room door, “I just need to grab…” she broke off since he was already heading to the door. 

READY ROOM  
She sighed inwardly and followed him. After the door wooshed shut behind them he held up her lab coat. “Looking for this?” he asked, eyebrows slightly raised.

“Yes, well mostly for the tricorder in the pocket. It has some data I need for my report, thank you,” she said, reaching to reclaim her garment.

He swung it out of reach. “I think we should talk about this,” he told her, a very slight smile playing on his lips. 

“What’s there to say?” she asked warily. “It was warm and I wasn’t really feeling myself.”

“I know exactly how you were feeling,” he said. “Did you behave that way with other members of the crew?”

“Of course not,” she said incensed. 

“Neither did I, but did you notice that other people were not so selective? It was more than the basic lust brought on by the virus. For both of us,” he explained. 

She glared at him. “Jean-Luc we can’t go down this road.”

“Why not? Do you know one of the biggest reasons I never believed that I could have a real relationship with someone?”

“You’ve always been married to your job, Jean-Luc, I know that,” she replied. 

“Yes, because I felt that I couldn’t divide my loyalties, couldn’t do what I needed to do as a starship captain if I had to order people I loved into danger.” He paused and let that sink in. “It seems as though I can no longer avoid that regardless of what I do. My family is on this ship, whether or not they live in the same quarters as I do.”

Beverly hadn’t really considered this. When she decided to come to the Enterprise she’d thought only about the ramifications to her family and her career. She’d known that he might not want a relationship with Susannah but she’d not reflected upon what having one would mean in his view. She sat down on the couch and let out a breath. 

“Jean-Luc, I don’t know what to say. I didn’t think of any of that this way,” she said, running her fingers through her hair. 

“I’m not blaming you Beverly, I’m not mad. I’ve accepted that the risk is worth having you all as a part of my life. But I find that I no longer want to visit my family a few nights a week. I realize that I no longer want to go back to my empty quarters,” he moved closer to her, raised his hand to her cheek, “to my empty bed.” 

He brushed his lips against hers, softly at first and then more insistently. She felt her arms go around his neck of their own volition. For a moment she simply felt the desire surging between them. And she enjoyed it. She spent so long repressing her passions that to be able to indulge them was almost overwhelming. 

Then she opened her eyes, realized where she was, who she was with, and the consequences of this returned to her. 

“Jean-Luc, we can’t,” she said. 

“Beverly, there is a real attraction here. I think we should explore this, spend a few nights just the two of us” he told her. 

Jean-Luc, dating is not an option. This is bigger than us now. It wouldn’t be fair to the kids if we didn’t work out. They have to take precedence over our desires.”

“What if it did work out? Wouldn’t it be better for them to have parents who are together?” he countered.

“Jean-Luc, I don’t think I am in a place to pursue a romantic relationship regardless. Between my job and the kids, I have enough on my plate,” she told him. 

“Beverly, these feelings aren’t just going to go away, we can’t pretend that they will.”

“No, maybe not but we are adults and we’ll just have to get over them,” she told him with a firmness she didn’t really feel. She placed a soft kiss on his cheek, picked up her lab coat and headed for the door. 

“I will expect you for dinner tomorrow,” she said before the door opened. “You will always be an important part of our family.”

Jean-Luc watched her go but vowed not to give up so easily. Now that he knew how she felt, knew that the attraction was as strong on her end as his, he was perfectly capable of playing the long game.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Susannah decides to visit her father on the bridge.

TURBOLIFT TO THE BRIDGE  
Susannah was angry at her mother and there was only one person she wanted to see. “Bridge,” she called as she entered. She wondered for a moment if the computer would object, but it didn’t and it proceeded upwards. 

When the doors opened, Lt. Tasha Yar at tactical turned to see who their new arrival was and was stunned to see a child. “Bridge access is restricted, you can’t be up here,” she said. 

“I want to see my P....Captain Picard,” the girl said. She spoke clearly but it was obvious she was upset. “I need to talk to him.” 

The other officers on the bridge had turned at the commotion. Captain Picard strode up the walkway. “It’s all right,” he told Yar. “Susannah, come, let’s talk in my Ready Room.” He led her into his private office. 

The bridge staff was shocked by the turn of events and Troi and Riker exchanged serious looks. Riker said quietly to Troi, “Do you think we should contact Dr. Crusher?”

Troi shrugged, unsure and jerked her heat towards the observation lounge where they could talk. 

“Mr. Data, you have the bridge,” Riker said as he and Troi headed out. 

OBSERVATION LOUNGE

“What do you think that is all about?” Riker asked. 

“I don’t know,” Troi said “but both of their emotions are very high. Susannah is angry but Captain Picard is more complicated to read. He is stressed but he seemed far more comfortable talking to her than I would have guessed. He cares for her and didn’t like seeing her upset.” 

“When I was with Wesley in Engineering he let it slip that the captain has been to dinner with them, and I got the feeling it wasn’t just one time,” Riker told her. 

“We knew that he and Dr. Crusher knew each other before this tour and being captain can be pretty lonely. Captain Picard seems to be particularly strict with himself about personal relationships with the crew. I can’t get a bead on the nature of their relationship.”

“I think we should tell her that her daughter is up here,” Riker said. 

“The captain seemed to be willing to handle it and I think we should let him,” Troi responded. “I don’t think we should interfere.”

“Okay, I’ll trust your judgement but if Dr. Crusher gets mad at us, I’m blaming you,” he told her. Riker liked the doctor very much but had ascertained that she had a temper and a smart mouth and had decided to do his best not to antagonize her. 

“Ever the gallant gentleman, I see,” she told him with a laugh. 

READY ROOM  
“Susannah, why are you so upset?” Picard asked, as they settled on the couch. 

“My friend Michelle asked me to go to the holodeck with her to go rock climbing and Mom says I can’t go. She’s so strict sometimes. There are safeties, Wesley read all about it, it’s not fair!”

“Susannah, your mother has made her position clear and while I will talk to her about it, I can’t just overrule her,” he told her. 

“Why not? You’re my Dad. You should have just as much right to decide what I can do as she can,” Susannah insisted. 

He should have expected this, should have known he’d be trapped between these two women. He rubbed his hands over his face. 

“Susannah, the best I can do is talk to your mother and try and understand her objections. Trying to overrule her would just get both of us in trouble.” 

His daughter studied him carefully and he had the feeling that she was strategizing something. Finally she spoke. “Maybe we could try a similar program, you know, all together and then she wouldn’t be so afraid.”

It was actually a very smart idea but he still wasn’t sure it was wise so he fell back on the oldest all-purpose parenting response of all time, “Maybe, we’ll see. I promise only that I will speak to your mother. Is she still on duty?”

“Yes, until 1700 today,” she told him. “Can I stay here with you?”

“No, you can’t, not today anyway. Can I trust you to get back to your quarters on your own?” 

“Yes, I guess,” she said sullenly. This was not going as she had planned. 

Picard guided her back to the bridge and walked her to the turbolift. “I will follow up with your mother later,” he said quietly as the doors opened. 

“Fine,” she said in the way children do when they are pouting. 

“Although if the attitude keeps up, I won’t,” he told her sternly and a bit more loudly. The bridge crew couldn’t hear the actual words but they all knew that stern tone. Deanna and Will exchanged another look. 

“Ok, ok,” Susannah said, finally contrite. She gave him a quick hug and departed. 

Picard calmly walked back to his chair and sat down as if nothing out of the ordinary had just happened. 

Riker, who was highly entertained in light of the captain’s previous proclamations about children, ventured a remark, “Seems like you are becoming popular with the ship’s children after all sir.”

Picard fixed him with a piercing stare, “So it would seem, Number One. Do you have those reports on the modifications to the sensor array that the Chief Engineer sent over? We can review them now if you are ready.” It was clear the subject of Susannah’s visit was closed. 

SICKBAY  
About two hours after Susannah’s visit, Picard made his way down to sickbay. 

Beverly was finishing up with a patient and motioned to him to have a seat in her office. “I’ll be right there.”

She gave Ensign Thomas instructions about her duty limitations, sent the young woman off and followed Picard into her office. 

“Hi, what brings you down here?” she asked as she sat behind her desk. 

“Susannah came to visit me earlier, on the bridge,” he told her. 

“WHAT? She knows better than that,” Beverly said. “She’s testing her limits, and you,” she told him.

“I know. I told her that she couldn’t stay but I did let her tell me what she’s upset about,” Picard said. 

“Let me guess, she’s mad about me not letting her go to the holodeck,” Beverly said, seeing where this was headed. 

“Yes, I told her that I would not overrule you but I did think that she had a interesting idea,” Picard told her. 

Beverly looked at him appraisingly and then threw her head back to stare up at the ceiling, “Thank you. I suppose though that we will have to start making some decisions together. I’ve never really had to share parental authority. Jack was away so much when Wes was little and then we’ve been on our own. I should have suspected that she would try and get you to overrule me, I just didn’t think she would catch on so quickly.”

“I would like to share the responsibility with you Beverly but I am smart enough to know that regardless of the circumstances, overruling you would not be in anyone’s best interest,” he said smiling. “I may be a novice at parenting but I was a child once and I’ve dealt with my fair share of Starfleet personnel who employed similar strategies,” Picard said. “She did suggest that we, as a family, might try out a similar holodeck program to ease your mind and I agreed to pass the idea along.” 

“Do you know what percentage of the injuries I treat are holodeck related?” Beverly asked. 

“No, I’d not given it much thought,”’ he admitted. 

“A good 60-70% of the minor injuries sustained by the crew have been on the holodeck,” she told him. “Now, as that has supplemented the gym and other recreational activities in many instances, we could at least conservatively attribute 45% to holodeck use. Granted, due to the safety protocols, they are usually minor but it is still a real issue.”

“Are you suggesting that the holodecks aren’t safe,” Picard asked, beginning to wonder if there was a true danger to the crew. 

“No, as I said they are mostly minor and the benefits in terms of exercise and mental health more than make up for those, but it does mean we should exercise caution. I would wager to bet that Susannah DIDN’T tell you that Michelle wanted to tag along with her 13 year-old brother and his friends on this adventure, and she wouldn’t answer me about whether or not there would be any adults.”

“No, she did not say that. I assumed it was Michelle’s family who were taking them climbing,” he allowed. 

“Not from what I could ascertain,” Beverly told him. “And as for trying out the rock climbing program, you are welcome to do so, it’s not really my cup of tea,” she said. 

“I thought you liked outdoor activities like that. We went hiking a few times from what I recall,” Jean-Luc said. 

“Hiking I like, rock climbing not so much. I’m more of a sit around the campfire, swim in the creek, watch the wildlife kind of girl,” she informed him. 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said. “And, if it is alright with you, I will take Susannah rock climbing, see how she likes it.”

“That’s fine, but beware, she may try and rope YOU into taking her friends!” she warned.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly reacts to Wesley being made an acting ensign.

EPISODE TAG - WHERE NO ONE HAS GONE BEFORE  
CRUSHER QUARTERS

Their nights had settled into a pattern and on Tuesday the kids did homework, occasionally asking for help from the adults and Fridays they had deemed game night. Jean-Luc was surprised to find that Beverly never allowed the children to win, she was too competitive.

“They won’t learn anything if you let them win, once they earn it they know it,” she told him. 

The kids were used to this attitude and Picard found that he learned a lot by watching them interact over games of cards and strategy. Wesley, for all his engineering smarts, was not a long-term strategist when it came to world building games but he dominated at chess and card games where numbers were involved. Susannah, on the other hand, was patient and planned her moves very carefully. Her come-from-behind wins became a bit of a family joke. 

Tonight’s game had come down to Susannah and Jean-Luc and Beverly had even let them play past Susannah’s bedtime. In the end, Picard had won but it was close. 

Wesley had left to go celebrate his appointment as an acting ensign with his friends once he was out of the game. 

Jean-Luc walked back into the living area after tucking Susannah in to find Beverly was waiting on the couch with refilled wine glasses. She handed him his and indicated that he should sit. 

“Jean-Luc, I need to understand what happened today. Why did you make Wesley an acting ensign? Not that I’m not proud of him, but it was a bit unexpected, especially after how you and Riker responded to him earlier in the day.”

Picard looked a bit chagrined and then nodded. Juggling his private relationships with the Crushers with his command relationship was tricky. He’d known that the bridge crew would accept his choice more easily than Beverly would. “I think that he has proved that he is an asset to the Enterprise and it seemed prudent to channel his energies. The role is not unprecedented and Wesley’s unique insights into engineering and starship operations make him a good candidate. As he has expressed a desire to attend the academy I decided that this would be a good way to facilitate that.”

“Don’t you think you should have talked to me about it first?” she asked. 

“Perhaps,” he said a bit chagrined. “I understood that you supported his intention to attend the academy.”

“I do, I just don’t want him to grow up too fast. This is a big commitment. Maybe because I had to and he’s already been through a lot more than other kids his age,” she said referring to his father’s death. 

“I understand. We will make sure that his duties do not interfere too much with his schoolwork. He already spent time in engineering, we will just channel that into allowing him experiences in multiple departments.”

“Alright,” she agreed. “He is very excited by the opportunity. I just hope he doesn’t annoy the other crew members with all his questions and suggestions.” Beverly was not completely naïve about how her genius son often irritated and intimidated adults. “Wes seemed to really connect with the Traveler, did he say something about that?”

Picard chose his words carefully. He understood why the Traveler did not want Beverly to know the extent of her son’s potential but she was savvy enough to see that something had transpired. “The Traveler expressed to me that Wesley has a unique understanding of his work and encouraged us to assist him in his development.”

Beverly narrowed her eyes at him. She could read his body language well enough to know that this was not the complete truth but she also knew that it was likely all she would get, at least right now. 

“Just make sure that he still has time to be a child,” she said. Her own childhood traumas of losing her parents at a young age and then living in the doomed colony at Arveda III had robbed her of much of her childhood and she didn’t want that same fate for her children.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean-Luc steps up his pursuit of Beverly and she pushes him to expand his role as a father.

CAPTAIN’S READY ROOM  
They had just finished discussing the plans for the transfer of medical supplies to a colony on Hariva IV. Jean-Luc came out from behind the desk and led her to the couch. “There is something else I would like to talk to you about.”

“I’ve been thinking about your resistance to dating and the answer to our issue is obvious,” he told her, “we should get married,” he said as he took her hand, sat next to her on the couch and looked into her beautiful blue eyes. 

She simply gaped at him. “Jean-Luc, I turn you down for a date and you propose marriage. I think I know why relationships aren’t your strong suit.” 

Used to her acerbic remarks by now, he ignored it. “Beverly, pretending we are just friends and that this attraction isn’t here isn’t going to make it go away. We care very much about each other. It clearly is not a casual relationship.” 

“We slept together once, 9 years ago, that is not a basis for a marriage,” she retorted. 

“One of the most memorable nights of my life,” he said, his voice low and husky. “And it may have been one night but I believe we made love three times, and I further believe that you enjoyed yourself thoroughly...maybe even four times,” he was whispering in her ear now. 

“Might have been five,” the thought flying out of her mouth before she could stop it. “No wonder I was mad when my bed was empty the next morning.” Somehow his nearness had made her lose all judgment, she couldn’t believe she had said that. 

He leaned into her, saw breathing increase at his nearness and he pressed his lips to hers. She resisted at first but when he slid his hand to her neck and deepened the kiss, she gave in. For several delicious minutes their tongues dueled and fire built in her loins. When she felt his hands on her rear, pulling her against his hips she fought her way to the surface. 

“Jean-Luc, we are NOT having sex on your ready room couch.”

“Are you sure about that?” he asked, his hands roaming up and down her sides, his fingers grazing the sides of her breasts tantalizingly. 

“Yes,” she said, finally finding the strength to push him away. “Go sit behind your desk so we can have a rational conversation. 

“We are having one right here,” he insisted. He held her gaze as he gently cupped a breast, his thumb unerringly finding her nipple under the uniform and sliding slowly back and forth across it, feeling it harden at her touch. He saw the desire in her eyes and he saw her fight to overcome it. 

“No, you are staging a seduction, that is not the same thing. We are on duty.” she replied. 

Believing he had made his point, he acquiesced for the moment in letting her go, but he did not rise from the couch. ”Actually the alpha shift ended fifteen minutes ago.” 

Seeing that he wasn’t going to move, she stood up, walked over and sat in his chair and looked at him from behind his own desk. He narrowed his eyes at her. The gall of this woman! Was it any wonder that she fascinated him?

“Jean-Luc, have you ever even lived with a lover? Shared quarters with a woman longer than a shore leave?” she asked. 

“What relevance does that have? I’ve never wanted a woman to live with me before. I do know that I hate going home to my empty quarters now. They don’t feel like home, they are just a place to sleep. My home is with you and the children,” he told her. 

“Jean-Luc, you see all the easy parts of parenting and family. At dinner everyone is on their best behavior. You don’t experience the fights about homework, or the video games I won’t let them play, or the times when they are just cranky and don’t want to get up in the morning. The meltdowns about a friend who was mean. Full-time family life is messy. Your life is built on order. You are a fastidious man. Can you even imagine having to convince kids to clean their rooms? Discovering bowls of half-eaten food in their rooms?”

“You’ll teach me how to handle it,” he told her. “I’m a quick study. I didn’t screw up when Susannah tried to play me against you. I’ve run starship crews for years, certainly I can learn to manage a few children.”

“Jean-Luc, you have your independence, your freedom to run your days how you chose and how you need to as captain. I don’t think you have any idea how full-time life with us would change all that. Kids rarely understand the idea of personal space or quiet time. When you raise them from babies patterns develop naturally but coming into it midstream would be chaos.”

“Maybe my life needs some chaos. I’m not denying that it will be an adjustment Beverly, but it is what I want. You and the children, you are what I want,” he said decisively. 

He walked over to her and sat on the desk. “You know I love your family, I will love you if you will let me,” he said tenderly laying his hand on her cheek and pressing his lips softly to hers. 

The insistent declaration and the gentleness of that kiss, juxtaposed with his earlier carnal onslaught wreaked havoc with her senses. She didn’t know what to think. Had she been independent for so long that she couldn’t see any other way? Was she afraid for her kids or for herself? Was that she afraid that it wouldn’t work, or that it would?

“I’ll think about it,” she allowed. “But you are going to need to start taking more responsibility.” Which conversely meant she would have to relinquish some control, and that she knew would likely be the hardest part. 

“I can do that,” he said. 

“Ok.” She decided to throw him to the wolves. “I need to do inventory next week before we are due at the Starbase. It will be a very long day and you can handle the kids - get them breakfast, to school, all of it. I can schedule it on any day, what day are you off?”

He nudged the chair over and consulted his computer. “Wednesday or Thursday,” he told her.

“Wednesday it is,” she told him. “Be there by 0600 to get the kids up and fed before school.” And with that she stood up and walked out. He lowered himself into the chair and wondered if he could convince her to let him spend the night after dinner Tuesday.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean-Luc is in charge of getting the kids off to school.

CRUSHER QUARTERS  
Homework had been completed and the kids had gone to shower and get ready for bed. Beverly moved to clean the last of the evening’s glasses off the table when Jean-Luc came up behind her. He put one hand on her waist and used the other to brush back the hair from her left shoulder. He leaned in and kissed the side of her neck and then whispered in her ear, “Given how early I need to be here, I think it would be more efficient if I spent the night.”

Beverly sighed and rolled her eyes. “Somehow I don’t think that would leave me in very good shape to focus on inventory.” 

“It’s early yet, we can go to bed now and you can get plenty of rest,” he encouraged, his breath hot against her ear. He gently turned her to face him, lowering his lips to hers. 

The door from Wesley’s bedroom opened and Beverly pulled away, but not before he observed the close proximity of the two adults. “I just wanted to grab some water,” he said, proceeding to the replicator. He picked up the glass as it appeared and smiled awkwardly at his mom, “Good night.” 

As the door closed behind him, Beverly looked at Jean-Luc. “And that is why you are going to your own quarters!” 

“Beverly, I fully intend for him to get used to seeing us like this,” Picard told her as he drew her back into his arms. 

“Jean-Luc lust is not enough to make these kinds of changes, not with the kids involved,” she implored. 

“It’s not simple lust and you know it,” he said with a touch of irritation in his voice. “That’s why it scares you.”

Damn but he could read her so easily. “Of course it scares me! I have two children I am responsible for, my first husband died and last time I gave into this,” she waved her hand between their bodies, “I ended up alone with a daughter on the way. The prudent course of action is to focus on my family and career, I don’t think I have it in me to take on a relationship.”

“You do, you can, with me,” he told her, tenderly but firmly. “I’m not going anywhere.” He pulled her close again. 

She leaned into his embrace and laid her head on his shoulder. “I don’t know Jean-Luc, you’re going to have to give me time.”

“I will,” he acceded. “But I’m going to continue to work on persuading you too,” he told her as he planted another kiss on her soft lips. “So if I pass tomorrow’s test, you will have dinner with me, just us, no kids.” 

“That wasn’t the deal,” she told him. 

“I’m amending the original agreement, I want time with you too.” 

“We’ll see,” she said with a smile, “but for now, you are back to your own quarters!” 

CRUSHER QUARTERS 

At promptly 0555 Captain Picard appeared and Beverly let him in. She had her lab coat over her arm and was ready to depart. “Kids need to get up by 0630 as school starts at 0730. I had them lay out clothes last night so that should be done and they can have omelettes or sausage for breakfast. There is fresh fruit on the table,” and with those brief instructions she moved to depart. Picard caught her around the waist and gave her a quick, hard kiss. 

Beverly sighed and headed out. It has been so long since anyone had shown this kind of interest in her and it was hard to resist. Beverly had worked at portraying an untouchable image, super-efficient doctor and mother and for the most part it worked. She knew she intimidated most men and that had been the way she had wanted it. Jean-Luc’s pursuit of her was flattering, but she couldn’t quite allow herself to believe that there could be a happily-ever-after for her. 

Picard had brought a PADD with him and sat on the couch to peruse some reports before it was time to wake the kids. 

Just as he was getting up to go into the kid’s rooms, Wesley appeared a little bleary eyed, but awake. “Good morning, sir,” he said. “I’m just going to hit the shower.” 

“Good morning, Wesley. What would you like for breakfast?” he inquired. 

“I’ll get it once I get out Captain,” Wesley said. “You’d better start working on Susannah, she’s not much for mornings.”

Picard had noticed that Wesley was not looking him in the eye. “Wesley, is something wrong?” He waited a bit and Wes still didn’t speak. “Wesley, I know you saw me with your mother last night, does that bother you?”

“I don’t know,” Wes said. “I really don’t,” he said, turning to look at Picard. “I want her to be happy, and if you can make her happy that’s great, but last time...last time you didn’t.”

“I understand that. Wesley and you should know that my intentions here are permanent. I want us to be a family in every sense of the word. I’m in love with your mother, I think I have been for a long time. Before...well I’m not proud of how I acted when Susannah…” he gestured in a way that Wes understood that he meant when Susannah was conceived, “but I believe that the most important thing we can do in life is grow and learn from our mistakes.”

“Mom acts tough Captain, but sometimes I know she gets tired and maybe lonely too. It’s better here on the Enterprise though, for all of us,” he offered. 

“I’m glad to hear that. I want this family to be a happy one, all of us,” he said squeezing Wes’s shoulder as he headed into Susannah’s room. 

For a minute, Picard just watched her sleep. Her red hair, so much like her mother’s, lightly tangled on the pillow, a small stuffed animal peeking out from under the covers, her breathing soft and even. She was so beautiful to him, this child he had never thought he would have. He leaned down and touched her shoulder, “Susannah, it’s time to get up,” he said in a voice just above a whisper. She did not respond so he repeated himself louder. She rolled over, tucking her hand beneath her cheek. 

Finally, Picard resorted to his command voice, “Susannah, it is time to get up,” his deep baritone reverberating in the small bedroom. 

With that, she finally stirred and turned to look at him through narrow eyes. Wes had been right, clearly she was not a morning person. “Five more minutes,” she murmured and laid back down. 

“No, your mother left strict instructions and we are going to follow them,” he told her as he peeled her covers back and offered her a hand. 

She looked at him with clear irritation but took his hand and stood up. “Can we have pancakes for breakfast?” she asked. 

“I’ll make you a deal,” he proposed, “if you are showered and dressed I will get you sausage and a pancake.”

She grunted but started towards the bathroom that Wes was leaving, now showered and dressed for the day. 

Wes headed to the replicator, “Can I get you something sir?” he asked. 

“A cup of Earl Grey tea, please,” he requested. “You weren’t kidding about her not being a morning person,” Picard acknowledged. 

Wes smiled, “Some mornings I think mom’s yelling can be heard in the corridors, even with the soundproofing,” he joked. 

“I will admit, I did offer a bribe of a pancake to go with her sausage and fruit,” Picard admitted. 

“Mom often says that parenting is a combination of bribery and threats,” Wes told him as they sat down to eat. 

Captain Picard laughed at that, “Good to know she’s not always perfect,” he said.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Susannah feigns being ill, how will Picard handle it?

ENTERPRISE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL  
“Mrs. Parnum, my tooth is really hurting, I want to go home,” Susannah told her teacher, pressing her hand to her jaw. 

Mrs. Parnum turned to regard the young girl who had worked hard all morning without the slightest sign of discomfort. “This didn’t seem to be bothering you earlier but I can call your mother and see if we can give you an analgesic for the pain,” she offered. 

“No, my mom’s very busy today. She has to inventory and check all the equipment in sickbay before we get to the starbase next week. A friend is watching us today. He’s in my quarters so I’m sure I can just go there and rest,” she told her. 

Mrs. Parnum eyed the child carefully, wondering what this was all about. “I can’t just let you go to your quarters without your mother’s approval Susannah. Maybe I can just get you some ice to put on it.”

“No, I really want to go to my quarters. You can call Captain Picard, he’s in charge of us for the day.”

Mrs. Parnum could not have been more shocked if the child had told her that a Romulan general was her babysitter. “Susannah, I can’t possibly call the Captain, he is probably on the bridge and working. I think I should call your mother,” she insisted. 

“No, he’s not, he’s not on duty today,” Susannah informed her. “You can ask the computer if you don’t believe me.” 

The teacher was feeling like a tough conversation with Dr. Crusher was in her future but she decided that verifying this detail couldn’t hurt. “Computer, is Captain Picard currently on-duty?”

“Captain Picard’s next scheduled duty shift is Alpha shift on Friday,” came the feminine voice of the Enterprise computer. 

“See,” said Susannah, in that exasperated tone that children always seem to use when they prove adults wrong. “Call him, he will come get me.”

Mrs. Parnum dearly loved being a teacher but certain students were more challenging than others. Prior to today, she would not have put Susannah Crusher on that list, but she was rapidly changing her mind. She decided to go ahead and do as she asked, hoping that it wouldn’t result in dealing with an irritated Captain Picard. 

She walked to the wall console, “Elementary school to Captain Picard,” she said. 

“Picard here,” came the quick response. “Is something wrong?”

“It’s Mrs. Parnum, Captain, I teach in the elementary school and Susannah Crusher is complaining of a toothache. She insisted that I call you rather than her mother. I am sorry to disturb you.”

“It’s not a problem Mrs. Parnum, I will be right down,” he replied. 

Mrs. Parnum was now even more confused. She was only supposed to release children to a parent or other designated individual but surely she couldn’t refuse to let Susannah go with the ship’s captain. 

“Susannah, go and gather your things,” she told her young student. She supposed she would just have to let her go and hope it was the right choice. 

Captain Picard appeared at the doorway to the elementary building dressed in casual clothing of dark slacks and a green shirt. “Thank you for calling me Mrs. Parnum. I realize this is a bit unorthodox but I agreed to be on-call for the children today as Dr. Crusher has an exceedingly busy schedule preparing for our arrival at Starbase 36 next week. I will take Susannah back to her quarters so she can rest.”

Susannah appeared next to her teacher clutching her backpack. She smiled brightly when she saw the captain but seemed to remember that she was “ill” and raised her hand back to her jaw. “Can we go?” she asked. 

“Do you have any schoolwork that you need to take?” he asked. 

Susannah shook her head. “The only things left today are literature, and I already finished my book, and then music class,” she told him. 

He thought this indicated some serious forethought on the child’s part but he kept that to himself. “Yes, we can go,” he said, not wishing to discuss the situation further in front of the teacher. 

“Thank you for your help Mrs. Parnum, have a nice day,” he said as he motioned Susannah to follow him. 

The teacher watched them walk away, even more incredulous when she saw Susannah slip her hand into the captain’s as they turned the corner. 

As they entered the turbolift, he turned to Susannah, “What is this really about?”

“My tooth hurts,” she insisted, “see it’s loose but it won’t come out and it is uncomfortable.” She stuck her finger into her mouth and wiggled the offending tooth, wincing to support her story.

They entered the Crusher’s quarters and he went to the replicator and ordered them both tea, earl grey for himself and a lemon herbal blend he knew his daughter liked. He set them on the kitchen table. “Perhaps the tea will make it feel better,” he said, gesturing to the cup. 

“I’m sure it will,” Susannah said, her delight at having gotten her way evident on her face. 

Picard again felt a bit out of his depth, realizing that he was going to have to work to ensure that he was not wrapped around this child’s finger. Only years of discipline at controlling his emotions kept him from laughing and gathering her into his arms as he would have liked. 

Susannah quickly drank her tea and proclaimed that her tooth was now feeling much better. 

“Now we can spend the rest of the day together,” she told him, reinforcing his notion that she had never really been in pain, but had simply wanted to leave school. It occurred to him now that she was actually motivated by a desire to spend time alone with him. Deciding that no real harm had been done, he decided to indulge her. He’d deal with Beverly later if need be. There was a slim possibility that she wouldn’t find out about their playing hooky. 

“What would you like to do Susannah?” he asked. 

“I don’t know. There are lots of places kids can’t go on a starship,” she told him. “Did you grow up on a starship?”

“No, I grew up on Earth in a place called France. My family owns a vineyard there. They grow grapes and make wine, and have done so for hundreds of years.”

“Wow,” she said. “We’ve never lived anywhere more than a couple of years. We lived on planets a few times, but then on the starbase before we came here. Do you have pictures in your quarters of where you grew up?”

“A few, but I have a better idea,” he told her. He knew what he was thinking now might be more than what Beverly had bargained for when she agreed to let him watch the kids for the day but he decided that his relationship with Susannah was important enough to risk it. “Computer, are there any holodecks not currently in use?”

“Holodecks 3 and 4 are unoccupied at this time,” came the response. 

“We have a few hours before dinner so I will show you my home if you would like,” he told her. 

“Oh yes!” she agreed and they set off.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean-Luc and Suannah visit LaBarre. Beverly agrees to a private dinner.

HOLODECK 3  
“Computer run program Picard Labarre 1,” he instructed and his childhood home and vineyard appeared around them.

“It is so pretty,” Susannah said in awe. The program showcased spring in the vineyard, the warm sun shining down on the vines ripe with grapes. His mother’s herb and flower garden bloomed along the side of the house. “You really grew up here?” 

“I did. I’ll show you around.” He spent the afternoon showing around the grounds of his home, hoping that one day they would be able to explore the area in person. He showed her the trails where he ran and rode horses, how they carefully pruned and tied up the vines, the caves where they stored the aging wine in barrels and even the treehouse where he loved to stargaze. He told her stories of his mother, his brother Robert and even a little about his own father. 

Picard had not realized how much sharing all that with her would mean to him. He’d never thought he would have children to share it with. Although he didn’t see living in LaBarre, it was still his home and the history of it meant something. 

As the sun began to set in the holodeck simulation, he realized they needed to be getting back and he called Susannah to him. They set off for her quarters where he made dinner and sat on the couch waiting for Beverly to return. 

CRUSHER QUARTERS

Beverly came in just after 2200 to find him laid out on the couch with a Dixon Hill novel in paperback open on his chest. His eyes were closed, his breathing deep and even. She left him there as she peeked in on each of the kids, asleep in their beds. She pressed soft kisses to their foreheads. 

Returning to the family room, she lightly shook Picard’s shoulder to rouse him. He sat up slowly, grasping his book and shutting it. He looked at her with a small smile, “Did I pass?”

“Everyone appears to be in one piece,” she admitted, “and now I think it is bedtime for us.” 

He looked at her through hooded eyes and stroked her hair with his hand, moving in for a kiss. She allowed it but when his tongue begged entrance she pulled out of his embrace. “I did not mean to imply that was a joint activity,” she told him but her voice was soft, not accusatory so he considered it progress. 

“I believe you owe me dinner, we can continue this then. Say, Saturday at 1930, my quarters,” he said smoothly. 

She started to resist the intimacy of dining in his quarters but wasn’t sure that Ten-Forward would be a better option given that there wasn’t a ship’s function they could purport to be attending. “All right,” she said.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly comes to dinner in the Captain's quarters. Can he convince her to stay?

CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS

The door chimed softly just as he was finishing opening the wine. “Come,” he called as he set down the corkscrew. He turned to look at his beautiful guest. She had dressed simply for the evening, in black slacks and a blue sweater. He was intrigued to see that she wore thin strappy sandals through which painted toes peeped out. 

“Welcome, I’m glad you came,” he told her. She simply smiled at him. He looked casual and handsome in a light green V-necked shirt and khaki colored slacks. 

“What are we having? It smells wonderful” she told him. She looked curiously at the two pots on the table. One seemed to contain a melted cheese and the other a simmering broth. A nearby platter contained cut green apples, sourdough bread cubes, various meats and vegetables. 

“It’s called fondue, it was a favorite of mine growing up. Maman used to make it on special occasions. The cheese we can just dip the bread, apples and vegetables into and then we cook the meat in the broth.”

“All right,” she said sitting down. 

Picard moved to pour wine for both of them. He sat down and raised his glass, “to old friends and new beginnings.” 

Beverly lifted her glass and they clinked together softly. 

“How has your day been?” he asked. 

“Nothing too exciting. If I’m not on duty, we usually spend Saturday morning clearing things out from the week and the kids have some chores to do. There was one interesting thing, every Friday the kids bring home a file of their schoolwork from the week. This week, Susannah’s folder contained a note that she left early on Wednesday due to a toothache.” She peered at Picard, inviting an explanation. 

“Yes,” he conceded. “I picked her up. She was actually quite smart about it. She completed all of her actual classwork and then called. I realized that it wasn’t really about leaving school, but about spending time with me one on one. We haven’t really given her that option.”

Beverly sighed, “No, I don’t suppose we have. Maybe she was afraid to ask. What did you end up doing?”

“She asked about where I grew up so I ended up taking her to the holodeck to show her my family’s land in France.” As they ate, he told Beverly about their explorations of the land, a few of the family stories he had shared and how much Susannah had liked the horses. 

“You really will have to teach her how to ride,” Beverly told him. 

“I look forward to it,” he said with a smile. “It was a wonderful time for us Beverly, please don’t be upset with her,” he implored. Hoping that she wouldn’t be upset with him either. 

“I’m not. I just wish she would have asked. I suppose we will have to communicate to her that her curiosity is ok, good actually. I know she needs to explore her relationship with you and your history is part of her identity.” 

“I had no idea how much I would like sharing that with her. I would like to take you all there next time we are near Earth,” he said. “It’s funny, I spent my whole childhood thinking of how to get away and now I find that I would really like to return. Only for a visit, mind you, but I realize that as you said, it is a part of who I am. I’m not sure I realized how big of a part until I shared it with Susannah.”

“I’ve found that being a parent teaches you more about yourself than anything else ever could,” she agreed. 

“What do you think is the biggest lesson you have learned?” he asked with a smile. 

“Hmmm, I suppose that I DO have patience, as most of my life I’ve found that in short supply!”

They both laughed. Dinner passed quickly as they chatted about ship life and the children. They moved to the couch and Picard handed her a small glass of port. 

She kicked off her sandals and drew one foot up onto the sofa into what he thought of as her relaxing pose. 

“You’ve painted your toes again,” he said softly, gazing at her feet. 

She laughed. “I can’t believe that you noticed that.” 

“You’d be surprised at what I notice about you. Everything else about you seems so practical, but these painted toes...,” he said as he drew her foot to his lap and began to massage it. 

“Jean-Luc,” she made a half-hearted attempt to draw it back to herself. 

He simply held on and dug his thumbs into her arch. She sighed in pleasure. 

“It reminds me of my mother,” she said. “One of my clearest memories is of her painting our toes. We were sitting outside in the sunshine and we were laughing and my father came up, and he kissed her. It was such a happy day. Only a few months before they were killed,” she trailed off. 

“I realized I don’t really know much about where you grew up. It was on a colony wasn’t it,” Picard asked. 

“I was born on Arvada III,” she said quietly. “But I consider Caldos my home I suppose. Nana and I moved there, after…”

"Give me the other," he motioned. She wasn't about to pass up a foot rub so she complied. Besides, this seemed safe enough.

She told him a bit more of what she remembered about life on Arvada III and their move to Caldos. 

"It's been lovely Jean-Luc, but I should be going," she moved to pull her foot back but he held on. 

"Susannah told me that she's having a sleepover at Michelle's and Wesley is going out with friends, " he countered.

"Jean-Luc, I'm not sleeping with you," she reiterated. She wasn’t entirely sure if she was telling him or reminding herself. 

"I didn't say anything about sleeping," he countered and with that he drew her foot upward and gently began suckling one of her toes. 

"Jean-Luc," it came out as a moan this time. He set her foot down and moved his body along hers, caressing her legs as he did so, finally lowering her to the couch cushions, and kissed her deeply. 

"Beverly, let me love you." She recognized that this was both a plea and a promise, and she surrendered. 

“Jean-Luc, you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into,” she said. 

“I do,” he said as he captured her mouth again. 

She kissed him back with the desire she had repressed for years. He slid his hands under her sweater, slowly moved up her flat stomach to stroke the gentle swells of her breasts through her bra. She luxuriated in being touched and arched into his hands. He brought his hands back down and grasped the hem of her sweater and pulled it over her head. 

Her bra was ice blue satin, simple and elegant and the sight of it against her creamy skin inflamed him even more. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. 

“You make me feel beautiful and desirable,” she said. She stroked the side of his face and kissed him again. She put her hands on his chest and eased them under the fabric of his shirt. His taut muscles twitched under her gentle touch. Beverly pulled his shirt off and tossed it to the floor. Raking her nails down his chest, she moved down and stroked just inside the band of his slacks, along his hip bones. 

Jean-Luc shuddered at her touch. She delighted in his responses. She’d forgotten how good it felt to arouse a man’s desires. He plundered her mouth again and she lost herself in him. 

Jean-Luc moved from her mouth down to kiss the side of her neck. His lips created a fiery trail of desire and he moved down to bury his face in between her breasts, finally reaching behind her back and unclasping her bra. He slowly drew it from her body and moved his hands to her bare breasts. 

Her nipples hardened as his slightly rough fingers fondled them. When he brought his mouth down to suck one into his mouth Beverly felt it all the way to her loins. 

His patience seemed endless as he lavished attention on one breast and then the other, back and forth until Beverly thought she might melt into the couch. 

It briefly occurred to Jean-Luc that they were making out on the couch like teenagers when there was a perfectly good bed in the next room but he was honestly afraid to give Beverly a chance to think. Instead, he reached for the clasp on her pants and flicked it open. 

He slowly dragged them down and tossed them on the floor. He then started at her ankles and kissed and stroked his way up her silky, long legs. Years of dancing had given her strong, defined muscles and had made her super sensitive as well. Her hands kneaded his shoulder muscles and stroked his head as nipped at her thighs. 

His fingers slipped inside the waistband of her silk panties, he ran his fingers around the band, barely brushing her skin. Finally, he pulled them away from her body and added them to the growing pile of garments on his floor. 

Jean-Luc glided his fingers into her, finding her wet, hot and tight. He used her fluid to moisturize her folds, lazily drawing circles around her labia. He moved his fingers in and out of her slowly, stroking her to a frenzy. 

He pressed his mouth to her sex and inhaled her musky scent. His tongue found her pearl and sucked it gently into his mouth while his fingers continued their assault. Her hips bucked wildly as she surrendered completely. “Jean-Luc,” she cried out. 

Jean-Luc held her in his arms as her body stopped shaking. He slid back up her length to capture her lips again. She tasted herself on his lips. 

“My turn or yours depending on how you look at it,” she said as she reached down. She stroked his erection through his slacks and felt it twitch at her touch. A wicked grin played across her face. Beverly was a woman who enjoyed power and command and she was embracing her role as seductress now. 

Gazing up at him she decided that if she was ever going to be on equal footing in this relationship she had better make that clear now. She pushed Jean-Luc to the side, wiggled out from under him and stood up. She glanced over her shoulder to see his stunned look and she laughed, low and sultry. “Coming?” she asked as she strolled into the bedroom.

Picard inhaled sharply at the sight of her naked, retreating form, her seductive walk mesmerized him. He breathed deeply and quickly followed her. Apparently she was determined to torture him. Given the prize if he survived, he was willing to take whatever she could dish out. 

He entered his bedroom to find Beverly lying on her side in his bed, one arm across her breasts, her head propped up in her other hand and a smile on her face. She’d tossed the sheets haphazardly to the foot of the bed. He reached for her and she held up a hand to stop him. 

He stopped and cocked his head. 

“Surely you’re not going to get in this bed with your shoes and socks on,” she scolded. 

He held her gaze as he reached down and pulled them off, tossing them to a far corner of the room. Still looking at her, he reached for his slacks and they went the same way. He stepped towards her again and she shook her head. 

“Everything,” she instructed. 

He complied, removing his boxers as well. She smiled and beckoned him to lie down with her. 

He did, but surprised her when he did nothing else. Jean-Luc stared into her eyes for several beats and then deliberately dropped his eyes down to peruse her body. He was willing to see how long she could wait. 

She didn’t last long. Beverly reached out and stroked her hand along his jaw and then lowered her hands to stroke his hard chest. Her long fingers reached out to massage his nipples. They pebbled under her soft touch. 

She drew her body up next to his and began to run her foot up and down his leg. Her mouth found his again and she sucked his lower lip gently, then brought her tongue to mate with his. Drawing in a breath she moved her lips to blaze a trail down his throat. Her tongue flicked a nipple and he moaned in response. Jean-Luc buried his hands in her fiery tresses and held her to him, stroking her back and shifting so that her leg fell between his. She gently sucked one nipple and then the other, glorying in his responses. 

Beverly continued her downward trek, first with her hands, gently raking her nails down his firm abs that twitched in response. She took his hardened length in her hand and began stroking him up and down, building a consistent rhythm. She lowered her head and licked his tip, tasting the salty liquid beading at the top. She lowered her mouth completely over him and he groaned. He let her move up and down a few times but then tugged her back up. 

Looking into her sapphire orbs he said, “Together.” 

He thrust his fingers between her legs again, igniting her flesh. He felt the gush of lubrication as her arousal kicked back into high gear. 

She moaned as he stroked her clitoris until it was a hard nub again. She moved restlessly against him. He gently tugged her arms up over her head as he mounted her and parted her folds to receive him. He paused at the threshold and waited for her eyes to find his. 

“Jean-Luc,” she entreated, her voice breathless. She bucked up trying to draw him in and finally he relented thrusting deeply into her. She cried out digging her nails into his back and matching her rhythm to his. Her long, silky legs wrapped around his waist. He moved one hand between them to increase the pressure on her most sensitive area.

Jean-Luc lowered his lips to hers, carnally assaulting her senses until she felt like she was nothing but a mass of nerve endings and sensations. As he felt her muscles begin to spasm around him he increased his speed driving both of them over the edge. She cried his name again as he emptied his seed into her. 

Jean-Luc collapsed onto her and she held him tight, slowly sliding her legs down from his waist. He could feel her heart beating wildly beneath her breast. She gently stroked his back as their pulse rates leveled off and he softened inside her. 

“I had almost forgotten how good you are at that,” she said with a sigh. “And how much I like it.”

“I’ll be sure to remind you consistently in the future,” he replied. 

“I’m not saying this is going to become a regular thing,” she told him. 

He grunted in response to that, refusing to dignify it with an answer as it would only lead to a senseless debate. Instead he rolled to one side, reached down and pulled the covers up over them. He slid his arm under her neck and pulled her up against his chest. She snuggled in and tossed a leg over his. 

He ran his fingers through her hair, watching the long, vibrant strands drift. He loved her hair, loved how it matched her personality, how it looked against her creamy skin. She toyed with the hairs on his chest and placed a soft kiss there. 

She only meant to close her eyes for a moment but he felt her drift off to sleep and smiled in reaction. Jean-Luc Picard was used to getting what he wanted and he intended to keep her this time. 

0545 Sunday  
Beverly awoke to the feel of a hard, warm male pressed up against her back, and at least one part of him was quite awake. She sighed in contentment, but then realized she needed to get back to her own quarters. She began inching toward the side of the bed, wondering if she could get out before he woke up. His arm tightened around her waist, letting her know that all of him was awake.

“I thought you objected to an empty bed the morning after,” he said huskily, kissing her neck. 

“It’s not the same, I’d like to get back to my quarters before I have to explain to my teenage son why I’m coming home wearing the same clothes I left in last night,” she told him.

“He’s a smart young man, Beverly, I don’t think you’ll have to explain it to him,” Picard said. 

“That is NOT better!”

“Beverly, he is old enough to understand that his mother is in an adult relationship, he knows we care about each other,” he resumed his exploration of her neck and brought his hand up to cup her breast, gently tweaking her nipple. 

She moaned and relaxed into his embrace. “I’ll stay, but I’m replicating new clothes!”

“Very sensible, my love,” he said and captured her mouth with his.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode Tag for When the Bough Breaks - Wesley and Susannah are abducted from the Enterprise by the Aldeans. How will Picard and Beverly cope while they are gone?

EPISODE TAG - WHEN THE BOUGH BREAKS  
ENTERPRISE BRIDGE  
"Wesley! They've taken my son," Dr. Crusher said as she watched him disappear almost as soon as she materialized on the bridge.

Worf consulted the reports pouring in amongst the red alert, "Saucer section reports six more children have been taken."

"It's the children, that's why we've been brought here. That's what they wanted," Riker said. 

"And that's what they have," Picard stated. 

Picard looked at the list Worf had compiled and his eyes met Beverly's, "Susannah had been taken too." Crusher and Picard exchanged a look so full of emotion that Deanna closed her eyes at the onslaught. Riker heard her intake of breath and glanced at her with concern but she waved him off. 

Picard rarely made physical contact with Beverly in public but he laid his hand over hers and briefly squeezed her hand as he said, "We will get them back."

Beverly swallowed audibly and nodded. She was a Starfleet officer and she knew how to put her emotions aside then necessary. In order to assist in the recovery of the children she needed to keep her head and focus on what she could contribute. 

"They can't have children of their own, so they're desperate. We need to understand that before we address this," she told him.

"Do you know why they can't have children?" he asked.

"No, but I'd like to try and find out," Beverly replied. 

"We need to meet with the parents of the other children," he told her, unaware of the phrasing he had just used on the bridge. It went unnoticed by most, as it was somewhat ambiguous but added to his emotional reactions and Susannah's visit to the bridge, Deanna understood the implication clearly. She respected their privacy but if this looked like it would compromise the captain's ability to handle the situation she would need to talk to him and possibly even tell Will. 

The captain convened a meeting with the parents, Commander Riker and Counselor Troi. He reassured them that he would find a way to bring back the children. He projected an aura of calm that only Deanna and Beverly were aware he did not feel. 

ALDEA  
Captain Picard and Dr. Crusher agreed to be transported down to the surface to negotiate with the Aldeans. Raude and Rashella welcomed them but their refusal to return the children was unfailing. They insisted that the children would be well-card for and as Rashella told them that the children would be “mother and father to a new generation, born of an ancient culture.” 

The Aldeans believed that their promise of knowledge and technology should be enough to assuage the federation over the loss of these children. 

Picard termed the discussion a “significant beginning” in an attempt to keep the Aldeans talking. 

Although their initial requests to see the children were rebuffed, eventually Radue relented and allowed Dr. Crusher and Captain Picard to see her children. 

Wesley was in the first room they were taken to. Beverly slipped him the medical sensor she had brought with her triorder and he walked over behind Duana and ran it around her body to collect data. Although disappointed that they were not there to take them back at this time, he understood and whispered to Picard that the Aldeans seem to lack any real understanding of their own technology at this point. 

In the second room they were taken to, Susannah was bent over a table on which several sheets of paper and various colored charcoals were scattered. When she heard them arrive she ran towards them. “Mom, Pa..”

Dr. Crusher cut her off with a sharp glance and said pointedly, “Captain Picard and I wanted to see how you are doing.” 

Susannah returned her mother’s glare and defiantly hugged Jean-Luc who glanced at Beverly and patted Susannah on the back. He realized that chastising her further would cause a scene. He was becoming aware that his daughter’s teen years were likely to be rocky and he figured his mediation skills would be called on more than he would like. 

“What are you working on?” Picard asked her, directing her attention to the papers. 

“I’m writing and illustrating my own book,” she told them and walked over to hold up a page. 

Her parents complimented her on her work before Rashella indicated that it was time to leave. Upon hearing that, Susannah asked plaintively, “When can we go home? I miss the Enterprise.”

Rashella reached for the transporter trigger on her arm but Beverly stopped her with a raised hand, asking softly, “Please.” Rashella stilled her hand. Kneeling down next to Susannah Beverly pulled her close and stroked her hair. “We are working on that Susannah. You have to trust us. We love you all very much. I want you to continue to be on your best behavior. Ask Wesley if you need something.” She placed a kiss on her forehead. “See if you can finish your book. I’d really like to read it,” she said, distracting her from their departure. 

Radue gave them one last hard look, “You have our offer Captain Picard. It is final” And with that, they were whisked off in the Aldean transporter. 

ENTERPRISE BRIDGE  
Upon their return to the Enterprise, they hear Radue’s voice once more, “Captain, we want you to understand the nature of your choice. A small demonstration of our power.”

The Enterprise spun out of orbit. When they stopped Picard asked for a position report. 

“It’s unbelievable sir, according to my calculation, we are three days from Aldea at Warp 9,” Geordi LaForge told him. 

“Geordi take us back to Aldea Warp 9,” Picard ordered. 

Radue’s voice echoed around the bridge. “Captain, if you don't accept our terms, the Enterprise will be pushed so far away, by the time you get back, your children will be grandparents.” 

ENTERPRISE SICKBAY - Two Days Later  
Picard entered sickbay and caught the eye of the nearest nurse, "Dr. Crusher?" he inquired. 

"She's running simulations in the medlab," he said gesturing towards the back of sickbay.

The captain strode to the lab and found Dr. Crusher and a female Asian nurse contemplating results displayed on the large computer screen on the far wall. There were circles under her eyes and he could see her weariness. 

"Nurse, would you give us a moment?" Picard asked.

"If you go get the PADD on my desk, I'd like to compare these results to those. Thanks, Alyssa." Beverly told her. 

She turned to face the captain. "I think I'm on the right track now. Their issues are environmental in nature and I think it is a problem with their atmosphere.It’s similar to a problem faced on Earth in the 21st century when their ozone layer was becoming depleted. Nurse Ogawa is bringing me the details of Data's scans from the planet," she told him.

"Excellent work, doctor," he said. "However I believe that you need to take a break. I understand you've been on duty for almost 48 hours."

"I took a nap earlier," she said defensively. 

"Beverly, an hour in a biobed is not sufficient." His voice was calm but firm.

She sighed. "Jean-Luc I need to keep working."

He simply stared at her and gently shook his head. "Six hours, in a real bed. Don't make me relieve you of duty because that will mean 12 hours off duty."

He could see her temper rising as color climbed her cheeks and her hands formed fists at her side. "Beverly, it will do no one any good if you become exhausted and make mistakes."

Picard took her hands in his. "Six hours. Your staff can continue the research and simulations while you rest."

As quickly as it had surged, her temper abated. She looked at the floor as her emotional turmoil bubbled to the surface. "Jean-Luc, I can't go to my quarters, not with the children gone. I'll sleep here, I promise."

He tilted her chin back up and gave her an understanding smile. "I already put a fresh uniform and pajamas in my quarters. Sleep there."

She considered fighting but realized it wasn't worth the physical or emotional energy. "Give me a few minutes to brief my staff and I'll go," she acquiesced.

"I'll wait," he said.

She headed out into the main sickbay, took the PADD from Nurse Ogawa and called two other staff members to join them. She quickly outlined the data and research she wanted collected in her absence and then walked out of sickbay with the captain.

TURBOLIFT and CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS  
Entering the turbo lift she told him, "I don't need an escort. I told you I'd go." She looked a bit surly and sullen and he somehow appreciated her human failing in that moment. Her vulnerability was rarely obvious but he loved her for it. 

He stepped closer and brushed a lock of fiery hair from in front of her tired, troubled eyes. "I know. I thought you could use a friend. I know I could," he told her.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I know this is hard on you too, as the captain and...as a father," she said.

He simply nodded as the turbolift doors opened. They quickly walked through the corridor and entered his cabin. He steered her to the bedroom. She pulled off her lab coat, tossed it on a chair and sat on the bed to remove her boots. 

She reached for the bag Picard had packed and pulled out a toothbrush and the silky shorts and tank top he'd chosen as her sleepwear. She took a quick shower and put them on. 

Upon returning from the bathroom, she heard him still in the living area and she popped her head out. "How much rest have you gotten?" she inquired.

He glanced up from the computer terminal, guilt on his features. "A few more hours than you, but not enough," he allowed.

She raised her eyebrows at him and he surrendered. He rose from the chair and followed her into the bedroom. He brushed his teeth and reappeared in a pair of silk sleep pants.

She was lying in bed quietly but her troubled eyes were open. He laid down next to her and pulled her into his arms. She laid her head on his bare chest. "We will get them back," he reassured her when he felt her tears. He felt her nod as he rubbed soft circles on her back.

She turned her face up to place a soft kiss on his lips. "Let's forget, at least for a little while."

It wasn't until he felt her hand snake down into his pants and she kissed him again more insistently that he understood what she was suggesting. Having no real experience with serious relationships he'd not really ever considered lovemaking as comfort per se but now it made perfect sense.

He kissed her back and they helped each other dispose of their clothing. Their usual lovemaking was somewhat frenzied and insistent but tonight it was soft and sensual. They caressed each other tenderly, love flowing between them. 

Jean-Luc nuzzled Beverly’s neck as his hand trailed down to her breasts. He massaged the pillowy globes and teased her nipples to peaks. Beverly’s hands fondled his engorged member as his left hand found its way between her legs. He gently parted her folds and slipped a finger inside her. Slowly he stroked her until she was hot and ready for him. Her soft sigh as he entered her sent waves of love crashing through them both. 

They moved together in a gentle rhythm, enjoying the feel of each other and glorying in the sensations they provoked. Jean-Luc felt Beverly's vaginal muscles begin to spasm around and he surrendered himself to his own climax. 

They fell asleep wrapped up in each other and slept deeply until the alarm chimed. Conditioned by years of duty they both woke quickly and dressed for their shifts. . 

When Beverly emerged, she found Jean-Luc had coffee and croissants on the table. "You have to eat," he told her, anticipating her argument.

Since she was feeling refreshed and she wisely realized a disagreement would be futile and waste time, she sat down as he poured her coffee. She quickly polished off a croissant with jam and grabbed a plum from the table. 

They both picked up their plates as they rose from the table and deposited them in the replicator.

Just as she was about to trigger the door, Jean-Luc placed a hand on her arm and drew her into an embrace. He placed a soft kiss on her lips and said, "You’ll have them back soon." She nodded and responded with a tentative smile. 

“We’ll have them back,” she affirmed. 

ALDEA  
Upon arriving back at Aldea, Data had been able to exploit a weakness in the Aldean shield to allow himself and Commander Riker to beam to the surface and look for ways to disable the Aldean shield for good. 

Radue greeted Dr. Crusher and Captain Picard with a plea for the Captain to intercede with the children who had been convinced by Wesley to engage in their own version of civil disobedience. 

When the captain arrived the children were thrilled to see him and Wesley informed him that he believed he had figured out how to access much of the Aldean technology. Picard ordered Wesley to find Riker and Data and assist them. He took the rest of the children and returned to where Beverly waited with Radue and Rashella. 

Picard hit his communicator and spoke with Riker and Data who notified him that they were able to locate the power source for the Aldean shield and computer and temporarily neutralize it. 

Dr. Crusher explained to the Aldeans that their shield was destroying their ozone layer, allowing the radiation of the sun to cause cellular damage that explained their pallor, lack of appetite, skin lesions and sterility. Radue did not want to believe her but Rashella pleaded with him to consider it when Crusher said that keeping this children without addressing this would cause the children to suffer in the same way. 

Finally, the children were beamed back to safety aboard the Enterprise. 

The Enterprise crew was able to help the Aldeans disable the shield permanently, reseed the ozone layer and Dr. Crusher was able to provide treatment to reverse the effects of the radiation poisoning.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Captain Walker Keel visits the Enterprise. How will his reunion with his old friends go?

HOLODECK  
That evening the Crushers and Jean-Luc Picard celebrated the return of the children from Aldea with a special picnic dinner in the holodeck. The children had chosen a summer evening near a stream. Wesley and Susannah were now splashing in the creek and the adults were relaxing on the picnic blanket, enjoying the feel of the generated sunshine and a well earned glass of wine. 

"I have some other good news,” Picard told her. “We will take shore leave in a few weeks at Starbase 48. It looks like the Horatio will be there at the same time."

"I'd love to see Walker," she said smiling. "It's been years."

"Really? When did you last see him?" 

"Oh, three, maybe four years ago. We exchange subspace messages a few times a year though," she said.

"Does he know?" Picard asked, struggling to keep the tone of accusation out of his voice. 

She realized then what this was really about. 

"I didn't tell him if that's what you're asking, but he suspected and finally confronted me. He knew we had a falling out and he knew you'd come by on shore leave," she said. "Once he saw Susannah he did the math." 

"He knew you'd requested the Enterprise," Picard told her. "He told me he hoped you were posted with me even when I was resisting."

"When you tried to block my appointment,” Beverly corrected with raised eyebrows. “And it's been so terrible," she teased. "Do not give him a hard time," she chided. 

"I won't, this was our issue, not his," he admitted.

"He'll be pleased we are working things out," she said.

"Is that what we're doing?" Picard asked, moving towards her and sliding his hand up her leg suggestively. Beverly looked to see that the kids were occupied before she turned to him and moved in for a kiss. “Maybe they’ll tire themselves out and go to bed early,” she said, laying her head on his shoulder. 

“We can hope,” Picard said raising his glass in a mock toast. 

IN ORBIT AT STARBASE 48  
ENTERPRISE SICKBAY

A shadow fell across Beverly's desk and she looked up to see Captain Walker Keel in her doorway.

She stood up and embraced him. "How'd you sneak over here? I thought we were meeting for lunch tomorrow?" she inquired.

"We were able to get in a little early so I decided to hit Jean-Luc up for a tour of the flagship. Thought I'd check in with my favorite doctor before I went to the bridge," he said with a smile.

"You just want to know if he's going to bite your head off," she retorted.

"So what's the verdict?"

"I think you'll be okay. He knows it wasn't your place to get involved and he's adjusted to his newfound circumstances," she said, moving to shut her door. 

"How are things between you two?"

"Complicated. You know Jean-Luc, whatever he thinks is right is right. Ten years ago it was a betrayal of Jack, he took advantage of me when I was in mourning and he was too old for me; now I'm supposed to fall into bed and matrimony with him," Beverly sighed.

"He's asked you to marry him?" Walker's surprise was evident in his voice.

"Again, you know Jean-Luc, he didn't propose so much as issue a directive," she rolled her eyes.

"You've been on the Enterprise six months and you've reeled in Starfleet's most confirmed bachelor. Even I'm impressed," Walker kidded.

She shook her head. "I think he's decided if he's going to have a family, he might as well be all in. Jean-Luc has never been one for half-measures," she replied. 

"Jean-Luc, a father, never thought I'd see it. How is he handling it?"

"He adores Susannah,'" she admitted, "and she him. Sometimes I wish I'd told him sooner, maybe I was wrong."

"You can't change it now Red," he said using his old nickname for her. "Besides, I'm not sure his response would have been the same when she was born."

"I'm not either. It's funny how much alike they are now that I see them together. She moves likes him, gets the same expressions on her face. I've always considered myself more in the 'nurture over nature' camp but I've realized how many little things seem to be inherited. He comes to dinner twice a week, has taken to Susannah riding and rock climbing on the holodeck and handled it when she visited him unannounced on the bridge to complain about me!" she told him. 

"A child on Captain Picard's bridge, I would have loved to have seen that!" Walker said. 

"I heard about it from our ship's counselor but she was fishing for more information so I didn’t get all the details, but apparently he whisked her into the ready room quickly.” 

"I know you've not accepted the marriage proposal, but what about the other?" He wiggled his eyebrows at her. 

She narrowed her eyes at him, "Are you asking if I'm sleeping with him? May I remind you that I share my quarters with two children?"

"That does not answer the question! Parents all over the universe have been making that work for eons," He teased. "I guess I'll just have to ask Jean-Luc."

"You wouldn't!" she insisted.

"Are you sure about that?" Walker said with a challenging smile. 

“All right, let’s just say I’m making him prove himself before I even consider changing my name again. He’s on homework and childcare duty too.”

“But the question is which one of those will cinch the deal, and I’m not thinking it’s how well he handles 4th grade math homework,” Walker opined. “But in all seriousness, Red, you look happy. That’s all any of us ever wanted.”

She knows he is speaking of Jack too and he’s right. True lovers don’t demand unending suffering. Jack would have wanted her to be happy. She sent him a knowing smile over her coffee cup, “Why don’t you head up to the bridge and see about a tour of the ship?” she suggested not so subtly. “I’ll see you at lunch.” She gave him a quick hug before he departed. 

BRIDGE  
“Permission to come aboard,” Walker inquired from the top level of the bridge.

“Captain Walker Keel, glad to have you,” Jean-Luc’s smile split his face, genuine pleasure evident there. “Let me introduce you to my staff.”

Picard introduced him to all the members of the bridge crew and left Riker in charge as they headed into the turbolift. 

As the doors slid shut Walker said, “I should be up front, I’ve already been to sickbay to see Bev.”

“Wanted to make sure the coast was clear?” Picard said knowingly. 

“Just wanted to make sure that you and your Chief Medical Officer had found a way to work together, professional and personally,” he said diplomatically.

“Yes, we’ve found a good rhythm,” Jean-Luc replied, the double entendre not lost on his old friend. 

Walker laughed. “As she was glowing I thought that might be the case. I couldn’t be happier. She’s a good woman and she’s had some hard knocks.”

“I wish I’d known Walker,” he said with regret evident in his voice. “Not just for us, but for Susannah too. She’s an amazing child, so smart, pretty like her mother thankfully. I missed so much with all of them.”

“Jean-Luc, you can’t change the past. I’m not sure you would have felt the same way 10 years ago. You were still raw from Jack’s death and Beverly didn’t need your guilt, misplaced as it was, and grief on top of hers.”

“Perhaps you are right. I didn’t think of it that way. Apparently I see a lot of things only from one perspective. I am working on that,” he said.

“I know. Glad you didn’t block her appointment though aren’t you?” he said with a smile. 

“Most certainly,” he said as they stepped off the turbolift and Jean-Luc began the tour. While walking the corridor, they kept their discussion to details about the ship and Starfleet business. 

When they finished the tour back in the ready room, Walker asked, “Are you really going to marry her?”

“If she’ll have me, when she decides she’ll have me,” he clarified. “ I’m surprised she told you about that. Beverly can be a very stubborn and independent woman,” Jean-Luc replied. 

“You wouldn’t fall in love with a pushover,” Walker countered. “A woman without principles wouldn’t appeal to you for very long.”

Picard simply nodded in agreement.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode Tag for Arsenal of Freedom - Beverly is injured on an away mission with Picard. How will he handle it on the surface and once they return to the Enterprise?

MINOS

Beverly lay shivering and bleeding on the ground of the cave on Minos. Jean-Luc knelt next to her to assess her condition. She needed medical help, that much was obvious. He tapped his communicator to request a beam out. No response. 

Beverly hit her communicator and received the same double chirp that indicated a failure to connect. “What’s wrong, why aren’t they working?”

“I don’t know, but I’m sure once they realize our communicators are out, the sensors will locate us and Geordi will beam us up,” Picard told her. 

Jean-Luc tried to move her and discovered her wrist was broken. He made a splint out of a sturdy root and tied it with a piece of material ripped from her lab coat. Beverly winced in pain several times but tried to keep the seriousness of her injuries from Picard. 

Despite her efforts, Jean-Luc grew concerned when she started to fade in and out of consciousness. She realized that she must be experiencing significant blood loss from the wound on her leg. Her medical kit had been lost in the fall. Beverly was able to identify a root that could be used as a clotting agent and he rubbed some of it on her leg. 

Jean-Luc sat on the ground next to her. “What else can I do?” he asked.

“I’m going into shock from the blood loss. Elevate my legs and I need to try and keep warm,” she said in halted tones. 

“Alright This may hurt,” he told her as he propped her legs up on a piece of broken column. Her color improved a little bit. He settled himself next to her and pulled her into his arms. He ran his hands along her arms and torso to warm her. 

“Jean-Luc, if something should happen to me, I’ve listed you as next-of-kin and documented your relationship to Susannah,” Beverly told him. “Jack’s parents were listed as their guardians, but I changed it a few months ago.”

“Beverly, we are going to get out of here. Don’t talk like that,” he reprimanded her. 

She nodded weakly. “I just wanted you to know.”

“Are you warmer now? I’d like to look around a bit more, see if I can find a way out.” Picard said. 

“I’ll be ok,” she said, urging him on. 

Picard got up and began to search for an alternative exit. He didn’t find one but he did find a console. Upon activating it, the salesman that had greeted the Enterprise appeared again and began extolling the virtues of the weapons system it was selling. 

Data joined them and the two men discussed options for negotiating with the salesmen and reprogramming the weapon. Neither strategy seemed promising. 

Finally, Crusher, who had had her fill of obnoxious electronic toys over the years, and had become adept at battery removal, made a simple suggestion. “Why don’t you just shut if off?” 

“Is that possible?” Picard asked Data. 

“Why not? It’s a machine isn’t it?” Crusher asked, aggravation in her voice. Sometimes the simplest option was the best if only she could convince the men of that. They seemed to be preoccupied trying to outsmart it. 

The salesman objected. “Why? You haven’t seen half of what this baby can do.”

“We’ve seen enough!” Picard said. 

Finally, convinced that he had made a sale, the holographic peddler shut the system down. The attack on Yar and Riker ended. Communicators came back online and Picard was able to contact the Enterprise. 

Lt. Commander LaForge still had to dispatch the weapon that had attacked them. Once he did so, he beamed the away team back and Dr. Crusher was immediately treated in sickbay. 

Picard and Riker strode onto the battle bridge and LaForge offered to return command but Picard declined to take the Enterprise back until it was in one piece. Instead, he decided to head down to sickbay to see how Beverly was faring. 

SICKBAY  
Approaching the outside doors to sickbay, Jean-Luc Picard took a deep breath and put his captain’s mask firmly in place. He strode in and looked around for Beverly. When he didn’t immediately see her he approached the first staff member he saw, a Vulcan woman. He was embarrassed that he didn’t know her name but he always dealt directly with Beverly. 

“Doctor…?” he inquired. 

“Doctor Selar,” she told him.

“Doctor Selar, can you tell me where Dr. Crusher is?” he asked. “I thought I should check in on her.”

“She is in the private suite. She does not like being a patient,” Dr. Selar said. 

Jean-Luc chuckled softly, “I don’t imagine she would.” He was halfway to the suite when he heard Selar speaking. 

“She has been given a sedative to relax her so her body can heal faster. She will not register your presence.”

“Thank you, doctor,” he said, dismissing her and entering the suite. 

Selar shook her head. The illogic of humans would never cease to baffle her. 

SICKBAY PRIVATE SUITE  
Beverly’s porcelain skin looked unreasonably pale to him. Her auburn tresses were splayed out on the pillow behind her and he couldn’t resist running his fingers through the silky strands. 

Beverly had an iron will but asleep in the hospital bed she looked fragile and delicate. The cuts that marred her forehead had been cleaned and sealed but he still saw them, they still cut him. Now that the situation wasn’t critical and the adrenaline had worn off he felt the guilt crashing around him. He had ordered her to accompany him to the surface. Riker had already been attacked so he’d known it was unsafe. 

That order could have cost Susannah and Wesley their mother. She had laid there with broken bones, bleeding out and there’d been nothing he could do to stop it. Like there had been nothing he could do to save Jack. 

Jean-Luc stroked the side of her face and murmured, “So beautiful, so perfect. How could I have been so careless with you? How could I have put you in that situation? I’m so sorry you are suffering because of me.” He wasn’t even aware he spoke aloud and under the heavy sedation she didn’t stir. 

In addition to putting Beverly in danger, he’d put the Enterprise at risk, left her in the hands of an untested Lt. Commander. Despite the fact that LaForge had proven himself capable, Picard knew his decision was not the wisest one. His crew had deserved better. 

But once he’d known Beverly would have to go to the surface he felt compelled to accompany her. Picard rubbed the back of his neck in self-recrimination and collapsed into the chair at her bedside.

He’d lost his objectivity and he needed to regain it. His feelings with regard to this woman were far too close to the surface. All he’d thought about when she was injured was how he and the children would cope without her. He was afraid it impacted his ability to carry out his duties as captain. Picard knew he needed to distance himself from Beverly Crusher to sort out his various roles. After watching her sleep for another hour, he rose and returned to the bridge.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Picard withdraws after their experiences on Minos. How will Beverly handle his behavior? Will he learn to talk over his concerns, to trust her?

CRUSHER QUARTERS (Three weeks after returning from Minos)  
They had enjoyed a nice dinner and Jean-Luc had helped Susannah edit an essay about their current class novel. Wesley had retreated to his room to continue research on a project for his advanced chemistry class. While Jean-Luc tucked Susannah into bed, Beverly straightened up the living area and then slipped into her bedroom. 

When Beverly emerged she found Jean-Luc had left. Again. He was avoiding her and she didn’t know why. He had left directly after dinner every night for the past few weeks. She had invited him to lunch twice and he had found reasons to rebuff her. 

She sighed. Decision time. Was she going to let this just drift away? Let him sulk and withdraw from her? In some ways it would be easier. This relationship was proving to be every bit as complicated as she’d feared. Is that what she wanted? Did she want to just co-parent and be the Chief Medical Officer? Or did she want to fight for more? Did she want to teach Jean-Luc Picard that relationships have to persevere when it’s hard, when it hurts? Damn him for making her risk her heart again!

She made up her mind and queried the computer for the captain’s whereabouts. He was in his ready room. Well he couldn’t stay there all night. This was not a conversation to have on the bridge so she would wait in his quarters. 

CAPTAIN”S QUARTERS  
It was almost 2300 hours when the doors finally opened to reveal the captain. Beverly had fallen asleep on the couch but her eyes flew open at the light. They faced each other in the dimly lit room, neither speaking as the door closed behind him. 

“Why did you leave again?” Beverly finally asked. 

“I had some reports that I needed to finish,” he replied, brushing her off. 

Beverly’s temper flared up immediately. She spoke harshly and clearly “Jean-Luc, if there is one thing I will NOT tolerate, it is lies. This is not about you having too much work. It’s more than that. You haven’t been with me in weeks.” She stared at him, waiting for him to speak. 

Picard looked at the floor and finally said. “You were injured Beverly.”

She looked at him perplexed. “You mean when I was hurt on Minos?” she said startled. He gave a short nod. 

Beverly realized then that the last time they had been intimate had been before that mission. She’d not connected the two events until now. “Jean-Luc, I spent one night in sickbay and was fine. I’m not that delicate.” 

“Do we have to talk about this now?” he asked, clearly uncomfortable. 

“Yes, we do. You have left directly after dinner every night for the last three weeks. I’m tired of you avoiding me. You were the one who pushed for this relationship Jean-Luc but you don’t get to be in charge of it. I deserve an explanation,” Beverly told him. 

She sat back down on the couch and indicated that he should take the seat next to her. Looking irritated, he conceded and joined her. 

“”I suppose I underestimated how I would feel if you were in danger, were hurt,” he admitted. 

“Ok,” she nodded. “I can see that, but you had to have known that was a possibility.”

“In a theoretical sense I did. Of course I did,” he said defensively. He rubbed his hand across his forehead. “I’ve told you that one of the reasons I avoided romantic entanglements was because I knew that ordering my ship into danger with people I loved on board was not something I wanted to experience. Seeing you so badly injured….” he trailed off. 

“It wasn’t your fault. That planet was controlled by weapons and we fell in a sinkhole. It isn’t rational to blame yourself,” she told him. 

“I gave the order for you to accompany me to the planet. It was, it is my responsibility,” he countered. 

“Jean-Luc, that is my JOB as Chief Medical Officer. I knew when I joined the Enterprise, when I joined Starfleet, that it wasn’t risk-free,” she told him. “Life is full of risks, whether you are on a planet or on a starship. Tragedies happen all the time. Arvada III was a safe, peaceful colony and look what happened.” 

“It’s not the same. I knew that the situation on the planet was tenuous at best and we both beamed down there,” he said. 

“We can’t change our roles Jean-Luc, but you don’t have to struggle alone. Relationships mean going through the good AND the bad TOGETHER. Couples, families share each other's burdens. You've spent so long thinking that you alone have to carry all this weight, all this stress, on your own but it's not true. You'll be surprised at how just talking about it helps," she said.

"You sound like Counselor Troi," he said, his tone a bit grouchy.

Beverly smiled. "As captain there are things you need to talk to her about. When it comes to our relationship, our family, and to you and me as individuals, you have to talk to me. It isn't all just great sex, you know," she said with a smile. 

“It is hard for me to articulate these...fears, these feelings,” he admitted. 

"That I already knew. I told you this would be complicated," Beverly reminded him. 

He nodded. “If we are being honest, it was more than just you being hurt. I shouldn’t have gone to the surface at all. I should not have left LaForge in charge of the Enterprise. I’m afraid my feelings for you caused me to be derelict in my duties as captain.”

Beverly took a deep breath. “That’s a lot Jean-Luc. You're responsible for your decisions but you aren’t a god.” She thought for a minute, reviewing the situation in her mind. “Geordi did an incredible job on the Enterprise so I think you are being too hard on yourself there.” 

“I’ve tried to tell myself the same thing but I don’t know as though that excuses me,” Picard said. 

“Jean-Luc you’ve been a captain for decades, and you know full well that the entire crew is part of every success and every failure. Starfleet is not a one-man operation. You had confidence in your crew and they proved you RIGHT. That is a good thing, not a bad one.”

“Are you insinuating that this is about ego?” he asked. 

“If the shoe fits….” she smiled. “Jean-Luc, you can only make the best decision you can make at the time and then learn from it. Who else would you have sent to the surface if you had it to do over again?”

“I’m not sure, I suppose I could have just sent you alone,” he said, his distaste for that idea obvious in his tone. 

“Yes, you could have,” she agreed, “because that IS my job. And you will have to do it again. I will go on away missions, and some will be dangerous or unexpected.” She paused to let that sink in. 

But it also wasn’t wrong for you to go,” she continued. “Captains are allowed to go on away missions, that is your prerogative. I know Riker doesn’t like it, but there are times when it is the right call. If I remember you went on plenty of missions when you were on the Stargazer.”

“I did,” he agreed, “but the Enterprise is the flagship and I’m not as young as I used to be.”

“Then you don’t have to do it again,” she said. “Or you can think of it from a different perspective before you do. And I think there are some advantages to maturity.” Her voice had turned husky and when he looked at her, he saw a gleam in her eyes that could only mean one thing. 

“What advantages are those?” he asked, sliding one arm behind her and drawing her to him. 

“Patience and control are two that spring to mind,” she whispered in his ear. 

“Enjoy that do you?” he inquired as he slid his hands down the side of her body, subtly brushing the sides of her breasts and hips. 

“I do, and I enjoy it even more when I make you lose control,” she said as she pressed her lips to his neck. She moved over onto his lap, her back to his front and reached down to pull off his boots. Then she flipped around, straddling him now and tugged at the zipper on his uniform jumpsuit. She spread her hands on his chest and lowered her mouth to one of his nipples, gently sucking it and raking her teeth across it. He let out a ragged moan. 

Apparently discussions for the evening were over. 

He pulled her up against him and captured her lips with his. He thrust his hands into her hair, dislodging the clip she had used to secure it at the nape of her neck. Jean-Luc’s tongue darted between her lips and she sucked at it hungrily. 

Jean-Luc, determined to exert some of that control tonight, began to slowly unbutton her blouse. He stroked each bit of skin as it was revealed, finally sliding the silky fabric off her arms and allowing it to land on the floor. She wore a cotton bra trimmed in a hint of lace in pale peach. It was hardly sexy lingerie but he thought it was so perfectly Beverly. Practical, durable and yet feminine. 

He traced the tops of her breasts and rubbed her nipples through the fabric until they were hard beneath his touch. He leaned her back ever so slightly and buried his face between those tantalizing globes. She arched against him and moved to undo her bra, but he stilled her hand. 

“I believe I will decide when that comes off,” he said. He slid her off his lap, stood up and then picked her up and carried her into the bedroom. His uniform jumpsuit fell as he stood and he kicked it off, abandoning it on the floor. He lay her on the bed, and reached down to strip off his socks. 

Clad only in his boxers, he moved to lay beside her. He nudged her over onto her stomach and kissed the back of her neck. He felt a shiver run through her as his lips and tongue leisurely blazed a trail down her spine. His deft fingers flipped open the clasp of her bra and lightly caressed the sides of her breasts. 

Picard moved to the waistband of her black leggings and slowly drew them and her underwear down her legs. Beverly’s legs were the stuff of men’s dreams. They were long, lean, muscular and incredibly sensitive. Even in her uniform they attracted attention. On duty Picard had to be intentional about not being distracted by the sway of her hips when she strode through the corridors. 

He trailed his fingers lightly across the bottom of her feet and circled her ankles with his hands. He bent down and kissed her instep and then nipped at her ankle. She moaned and tried to turn over. He placed a hand on her firm bottom and gently pushed her into the mattress. She relented and he resumed his journey. 

Jean-Luc began to massage her calves, steadily increasing pressure until her muscles were pliant under his fingers. He lowered his mouth to the tender spot behind her knee and sucked gently. Beverly gripped the sheets and moaned but he continued his assault. Picard’s touch turned light as a feather as he trailed his fingers up and down her inner thighs. She began to writhe under his touch. 

“Touch me, Jean-Luc,” she ordered. 

“I am touching you,” he countered, continuing to come right up to the throbbing juncture of her legs and then dragging his fingers back down. 

He moved to knead her taut ass cheeks and then placed a kiss right at the base of her spine, sucking gently. 

Beverly moaned. “I want you inside me,” she pleaded. 

He rolled her over onto her back, drew her bra off and lowered his hot mouth to her breast. His tongue swirled around her areola and nibbled at it with his teeth. Jean-Luc’s hand palmed her other breasts and pinched her nipple. 

She arched against him and raked her nails down his back. Dragging her hands down, she insistently ran her long fingers along his hip bones and divested him of his boxers. Her long fingers encircled his pulsing erection. She began to stroke him up and down. 

Jean-Luc moved his hand between her legs and ran his fingers around her outer and inner lips, teasing her to a frenzy. Finally he slipped a finger into her hot pulsing center and worked his thumb insistently over her hard clit. His movements caused her to dig her nails into his shoulders. 

She begged again, “Jean-Luc, “NOW!”

“I don’t think I’m the one whose going to lose control tonight,” he informed her with a tone of superiority. 

He continued to tease her and she finally had enough. She hooked her leg behind him, thrust herself up and flipped him onto his back. She climbed on top of him, took hold of his penis and slowly, deliberately impaled herself on him. She gazed deeply into his eyes as she varied the pace. She ground herself against his pubic bone and increased her speed up and down his swollen shaft. He grasped her hips and thrust deep into her, causing her to cry out. He felt her begin to tremble and pulse around him and finally allowed himself to spill his hot seed inside her. 

She collapsed on top of him and stroked his collarbone. She sighed in contentment. His hand came up to stroke her hair and he placed a soft kiss on her forehead. 

“I suppose there is one good thing about my making an ass of myself,” he said lightly.

“Hmmm, make-up sex?” she inquired and he nodded. 

“Although if you hadn’t been so stubborn and isolated yourself we could have done this several times in the last few weeks,” she pointed out. “And now we are in your quarters, not mine and I have to go home to the kids at some point. However, I think it will be a bit before I can walk through the corridors,” she acknowledged. 

“If you’d marry me or at least move in with me we wouldn’t have that problem,” he reminded her. 

She patted his cheek and smiled “Maybe someday but I think this incident proves that neither of us are quite there yet.”

“Perhaps,” he equivocated. 

They lay joined for several more minutes before Beverly roused herself enough to go the bathroom and clean herself up. She walked through the cabin collecting her clothing and redressed while Picard watched her from the bed. 

Once she was ready, she came and planted one more kiss on his lips. “Next time, we talk before it gets this bad. You are not alone.”


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode Tag for THE CHILD (Rewrote this as if Beverly were on the Enterprise - and moved it up as there will be episode tags for some other first seasons episodes after this but I liked this here for character development.)

THE CHILD - EPISODE TAG  
Beverly was just donning her lab coat to head to sickbay when the panicked call came through from Counselor Troi. She went to meet the counselor in her quarters as requested. Crusher was stunned when she ran her tricorder over the counselor and quickly confirmed her pregnancy. 

An hour later, she called the captain and he in turn commenced a senior staff meeting to discuss the issue. She was glad to see that once Deanna had voiced her decision, the captain supported her unconditionally. 

The two women returned to sickbay for another scan. Dr. Crusher took Deanna to a private consulting room so they could speak freely. 

They gazed at the monitor, both still in awe of the new life displayed there. 

“Did you ever think about it?” Deanna asked quietly. 

Beverly sighed. She knew what Deanna was asking and it was a complicated question, for her, for any woman. “I think any woman faced with an unplanned pregnancy thinks about it,” she said. “With Wes I was newly married and even though having a baby in the middle of medical school wasn’t ideal, we were determined to make it work. 

Susannah was...more complicated. I'm not sure if you realized, but Jack Crusher is not her father. Even though her father and I weren’t....together, he was still very important to me and at the end of the day, she was a part of me too. Once I saw her on the scan, I knew I wouldn’t terminate. It has not always been easy but I’ve never regretted it.” 

“Can we stop pretending I don’t know who Susannah’s father is?” Troi asked softly.

Beverly gave a soft, short laugh. “I’m actually surprised we’ve kept it quiet this long. How did you know?”

“It was really a lot of little things. That scene between you two in his ready room the first day, when she visited him on the bridge and then I was sure when the children were taken by the Aldeans. He guards his feelings very closely but when he’s with her, and with you, they are stronger.”

“Let’s not get into that complicated mess right now!” Beverly said. 

“Why not? It might take my mind off this,” Deanna said rubbing her hand over her developing bulge and turning pleading eyes on the doctor. 

“What do you want to know?” Beverly asked, throwing her hands wide. She’d had few close female friends over the years , and none who she'd discussed Susannah's parentage with, but she and Deanna had taken an immediate liking to one another. She was not one to talk about her personal life often, but she had seen over the past few months that Deanna was trustworthy. 

“Start at the beginning,” Deanna prompted. 

Beverly laughed. “I’m not actually sure where that would be! I’ve known Jean-Luc for almost 20 years. He was Jack’s commanding officer on the Stargazer and they were stationed together on Earth for a tour before that. I was just a cadet when I met Jack and Jean-Luc was rather like his big brother. Add in Walker Keel, and you had the Three Musketeers - brilliant, ambitious and good-looking, all of them! Before Jack met me, I gather they were a bit of a danger to the female population at-large.”

“I suppose I can see that,” Deanna said, “But the captain is so reserved now, you’d never know it.”

“I’ve realized that Jack’s death was harder on Jean-Luc than it was on me in some ways. He felt a personal responsibility for Jack’s death, beyond what a captain should. Jack was his closest friend, and I don’t think Jean-Luc has had many close friends, even as a child. I think it is why he tries to hold himself so separate from the crew now,” she said with a touch of sadness. 

“When did your..personal relationship with the captain start?” Troi asked. She wasn’t really sure if Beverly would answer. 

“Now we’re back to the complicated,” Beverly admitted. “Let me say, I loved Jack very much but there was always an attraction between Jean-Luc and I, and a special friendship. Jack had a happy childhood. His parents are wonderful, loving people and he faced very few obstacles in life. His charm and his optimism were a big part of what attracted me to him, but it also sometimes made it hard for us to understand each other. 

I lost my parents when I was very young and then I lived through the destruction of the colony on Arvada III. I was 10 years younger than Jack and almost 20 years younger than Jean-Luc but I still felt like the adult a lot of the time. Jean-Luc used to call me an old soul.”

“I can see that, but I would say a wise soul,” Deanna suggested. 

“Maybe. Jack always saw things as black and white, only looked for the simplest explanation or resolution. I see some of that in Wes, that single-minded fixation and I don’t mean to imply that it is a bad thing but it could be a bit frustrating. Jean-Luc has, and always has had a philosopher’s heart. We loved to talk philosophy and debate - our discussions about the implementation of the Prime Directive are really nothing new,” she said. 

“Please don’t think either one of us was ever inappropriate when Jack was alive because I don’t believe that we were but it was still maybe a deeper connection than a woman should have with a man who isn’t her husband. After Jack died, we grew closer. We exchanged messages regularly, at first just supporting each other through our shared loss but it became something more. We started to share our joys as well as our sorrows, our mundane every day. I began to look forward to telling him all the things I was learning and doing at work and he did the same, telling me about his missions.

I think we saw it as harmless, meaningless, just a subspace friendship. Jean-Luc Picard has always been focused on his career. He wasn’t going to have a family and everyone knew that, including me. Captain Picard was married to his ship. He was away on the Stargazer and I was on Delos IV doing my internship. Neither of us was looking for a relationship.”

“And then?” Troi asked. 

“And then a little more than a year after Jack died he had shore leave in the area. The first few days were fine but then one night...well one thing led to another,” she said with a wry smile. 

“So which of you left?” Troi asked. 

“He did. It felt to me like he practically ran out the door, couldn’t get away fast enough. He didn’t respond to the messages I sent and by the time I knew I was pregnant he was gone and my pride was up,” she admitted. 

“What made you choose to join the Enterprise crew?” Deanna queried. 

“I realized that I needed to tell him, give him and Susannah a chance at a relationship. It was a great opportunity for my career and Wes desperately wanted to be on a starship. It seemed to all line-up.”

“Your first meeting was...interesting,” Deanna said, remembering that scene on the bridge so many months ago. 

Beverly laughed. “I suppose it was from the outside. Yes, we BOTH had our pride up by then. Jean-Luc had realized looking at my personnel file that I had a daughter and that she was probably his biological child. Neither of us handled it well,” she admitted. 

“What about now? You all seem pretty content now,” Deanna said. 

“I suppose we are,” Beverly said. “He comes to dinner a few times a week and he and Susannah enjoy spending time together as well. They’ve really grown into their relationship.”

“And you and the captain?” Deanna asked. 

“I don’t know the answer to that,” Beverly said.

“Or maybe you do and you’re afraid to admit it, afraid to risk it,” Troi suggested. 

“I suppose. Part of me wants to give in so badly to loving him, to allow us to build a family but it's so complicated with the kids, our professional roles....”’ she trailed off. 

“What do you think he wants?” 

“He says that is what he wants. I’m just not sure that his vision of family life will match reality. I don’t think he knows what he’s asking.” Beverly told her. 

“Maybe he does. I get the sense that the captain is very sure about what he wants. He wants you,” Troi said softly.

“His desires are not what concern me. We’ve always been...compatible in that area,” she said with a sultry smile. 

“I didn’t mean it like that, or only like that. You must know that he’s in love with you,” Deanna said. 

Beverly sighed deeply. “Love isn’t always enough.”

“No, but it’s a pretty good place to start.”

“Speaking of starting,” Beverly pointed at the screen, “your baby is starting the third trimester,” pride and wonder in her voice. No matter how many women she helped through pregnancy, the development of new life was always a wonder to her. 

“I think I’m going to need some new clothes,” Deanna told her. “This fabric of this outfit has reached its limit.”

“I’m always up for shopping, even if it is only from the replicator files. Maternity wear isn’t always fashionable but I’m sure we can come up with something.”

The women headed off to outfit Deanna for a few days at least. 

CRUSHER QUARTERS  
Deanna Troi’s baby had been born earlier that day without incident. It was the most remarkable delivery Beverly had ever witnessed; no significant pain and Deanna was recovering at an astonishing rate. 

Having finished dinner, Wesley and Susannah were working on their homework at the table and Beverly and Jean-Luc were sitting in the living room. “Jean-Luc, I’ve never seen anything like it. Given the weird pregnancy, I’m not sure what I expected but that was unreal, no pain at all. As a woman who has given birth twice it was even a little unfair although I would never tell Deanna that!” Beverly told him. 

“I’m still concerned about what this being wants with us,” Picard said.

“I understand and on one level I agree with you, but right now he appears to be a perfect human/Betazoid baby, and he’s adorable.” she said with a smile. 

“Do you think about it? Having another baby?” he asked. 

“That’s a loaded question,” she said. “I think every woman thinks about it when she sees a new baby but I’m not sure I want to go through that again - not just the pregnancy and birth, but the infant and toddler years. No sleep, diapers, tantrums, teething,” she said with a laugh. 

She looked at him, noting the wistful look on his own face. “Do you?” she asked in surprise.

“I don’t know. It does hold a certain appeal. I missed so much of Susannah’s life and I regret it,” he said softly placing his hand on top of hers, seeking comfort and understanding.

She laid her head on his shoulder. “I know. I regret it too. I’m glad you’re here now.”

They gazed together at the children working at the table. 

“You wouldn’t be alone the next time,” he offered. 

“It might be worth it to see your reaction to it all. I can just imagine you wrestling with dirty diapers and ordering toddlers to obey,” she joked. Seeing that his expression was still soft and serious she added, “I don’t totally rule it out one day but we’ve got a lot to conquer before we add to this chaos.”

Picard nodded and patted her knee. There were days he wanted to change everything, have her marry him, move his family into the same quarters and maybe have another baby but he was patient enough to wait for it to fall in place.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly talks to Wes about her relationship with Picard. Beverly and Jean-Luc steal a few moments alone during a busy mission.

CRUSHER QUARTERS   
Jean-Luc had taken Susannah to the holodeck for a riding lesson and Beverly and Wes were working in the family room. 

“Wesley, can you let me know when you are at a stopping point with that assignment? There are some things we should talk about,” his mother said.

He nodded. “I’m almost finished, just a few more paragraphs.”

Beverly headed to the replicator and ordered a tea for herself and a cola for Wes. She put them on the table in front of the sofa. She picked up her PADD and continued to read until she heard Wesley set aside his work. 

“What did you want to talk about Mom?” he asked. He thought he already knew and he wasn’t sure what he should say but it wasn’t like he could avoid it. 

“Wes, I thought it was time that we talked about my relationship with Captain Picard. You know that we’ve been seeing each other and I wanted to know how you felt about it.”

Wes blew out a breath. “I don’t know Mom. I mean I like him and he’s good to us when he’s here, he treats me fairly when I’m on duty.”

“Ok. How do you feel about my personal relationship with him,” Beverly pressed. “I know you are aware that we’re sleeping together.”

Wes closed his eyes. His mother was always a little too direct about sex for his comfort. Not that there had been men before the captain, he guessed it was really since the captain as he was Susannah’s father, but she always spoke frankly about the topic and now as a teenage boy he rather wished she wouldn’t.

Opening his eyes, he nodded. “I know.”

“And?” she prompted again.

“I don’t know. I mean if you’re happy why does what I think matter?” he asked.

“Because you matter Wesley. I’m not saying things could or would change but I want you to know that your opinion and concerns are important to me,” she replied. 

“I guess it makes me a little nervous because he left before. He told me he won’t this time, that he wants us to be a family,” Wes offered.

“Oh he did?” she asked rhetorically. She hadn’t been aware that he’d spoken to Wes about their relationship. “When did he talk to you?”

“When he came over that morning so you could do inventory,” Wes replied. “It was a while ago.”

Back before they’d even started sleeping together she realized, and she wasn’t sure what to make of that. “How would you feel about that? About us becoming a family? I mean, more officially.”

“Are you going to marry him?” Wes asked. 

“I don’t know about that but I have a feeling that his relationship to Susannah isn’t going to remain a secret much longer. I know Susannah wants to be able to tell people and Jean-Luc wants to acknowledge her publicly too. If that happens people will look closely at my relationship with him so it may all come out,” she said honestly. 

“It will be weird having everyone know it,” Wes allowed, “but I want Susannah to be happy. How will that make you feel?” he asked his mom. 

“Truthfully, Wes I’m worried that there will be people who will say very nasty things about me, about Jean-Luc, possibly your father and you and Susananah,” she said. She felt it was important that Wes be allowed to contemplate these things on his own and discuss them with her before he had to face these possibilities.

“About Dad, why?” he queried, drawing his eyebrows together in confusion. 

“Jean-Luc spent a lot of time with our family before your father died so some people may think we acted inappropriately before he was gone.”

This had not occurred to Wes. He’d known, or thought he’d known, that his mom’s relationship with the captain had developed later. “Did you?” he asked in a strangled tone.

“NO! Wesley, we did not,” she said firmly. “Jean-Luc was your father’s best friend, he would never have acted inappropriately. I loved your Dad very much and Jean-Luc would never betray a friend like that.”

Wesley nodded. He would accept his mother’s word and hope others respected his parents more than to say things like that. “Why would they criticise you?” he asked instead.

“I don’t intend to tell everyone the full story but there will be people who criticize me for keeping Susannah from her father or who may attack Jean-Luc, thinking he abandoned us,” she explained. 

“Didn’t he though?” Wes said. 

“It was complicated Wes. Jean-Luc and I had grown close but we didn’t intend for our relationship to become intimate and certainly didn’t plan to have a child. Jean-Luc was still struggling with your father’s death and I was too. Instead of talking about it like we should have, we both pushed the other away. He didn’t know about Susannah until we came to the Enterprise and he’s made an effort since then, a good one. We’ve worked it out between ourselves but too often people who are not involved like to judge others. I just want you to be prepared.”

“Ok. Mom, do you think people will treat me differently? Say that the captain only made me an acting ensign because of your relationship?” 

Beverly sighed. “Probably some will. Those who have worked with you know the truth and that will have to be enough. I know that he wouldn’t have done it unless he truly thought it was the right thing for you AND the Enterprise. Jean-Luc’s dedication to his ship and crew means he would never accept any less. It wouldn’t occur to him to promote you to curry favor with me, or even to do it in some sort of homage to your father if he didn’t see the value in your contributions,” she assured him. 

Wes nodded. He loved being able to serve as an acting ensign. He was aware that he was socially awkward with his peers but when he was working he felt productive and more like he fit in. 

“Mostly Mom, I want you and Susannah to be happy. If you did want to move in with Captain Picard or marry him, that would be ok with me,” Wes told her. 

“Thank you, Wes. I don’t know what the future holds but I do want you to know that you can talk to me about anything. I will always answer as honestly as I can,” she told him. 

He nodded. “I promised Commander LaForge I would come by Engineering and look at some modifications he’s making if I had time, is it ok if I go now?”

“Yes,” she told him. She knew that the conversation had been a tough one for both of them but open lines of communication with her children was very important to her. Keeping secrets had not been a good thing for her family and she vowed not to do that to them again. 

CAPTAIN’S READY ROOM   
Jean-Luc had been working long days for over a week helping to negotiate a trade agreement for metal ores on the Manavla II. He had not been able to make it to dinner either day that week and was sorely frustrated with the intransigence of some of the delegates and business owners. Unfortunately, the ores were key components in the new hull designs Starfleet was working on so facilitating an agreement was imperative. 

Finally, the owners of the refineries had decided to have a conference amongst themselves before continuing negotiations so Jean-Luc was able to return to the Enterprise. He knew he should spend his time catching up on reports and maybe visiting some departments on the Enterprise to check in as he liked to be a constant presence among the crew in a professional capacity, but all he could think about was taking a break and talking to Beverly.

“Picard to Crusher”

“Crusher here sir,” she responded, indicating that she was with a patient or other crew member. 

“Doctor, I am back on the Enterprise and need to discuss a few things with you. Can you call me at your convenience?”

“Of course, sir, I am finishing up with a patient and will get back to you shortly. Crusher out.”

CRUSHER’S OFFICE  
Beverly sat at her desk and touched her comm badge, “Crusher to Picard”

“Picard here. It is good to hear your voice Beverly. It would be better to see you, would you be able to join me for lunch?”

“Sure. What time and where?” she replied, aching to see him as much as he was to see her.

“Thirty minutes, my quarters?” he suggested.

“See you then. Crusher out.”

CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS  
Jean-Luc had decided to keep the meal simple and so he laid out salads and sandwiches along with a pot of tea.

When the door opened and Beverly entered, Picard felt like his whole day became brighter. He realized he had grown accustomed to her presence, to processing his days by talking to her. He rewarded her welcoming smile with one of his own. They embraced briefly, Beverly placing only a chaste kiss on his lips. 

They took their customary seats at the table and he told her about the trials of the negotiations. Between bites she filled him in on the happenings on the Enterprise, including a birth the day before. Although Picard remained somewhat uneasy around children, especially infants, he always made it a point to visit sickbay when a baby was born. Maybe he could swing by before he returned to the planet. 

Beverly told him how Susannah had missed their weekly riding lesson and had talked her into taking her to the holodeck barn and introducing her to the mare Picard had programmed for her. “I didn’t let her ride but it sure is a beautiful setting,” she told him. 

“You should come sometime,” he invited. 

“Maybe, but for now I think it is important that you two have time alone together,” she said with a smile. 

Having made quick work of the meal, Jean-Luc pulled Beverly into his lap. “As long as I get my alone time with you,” he quipped. His lips met hers in what started as a friendly kiss but as they inhaled each other’s scents, it deepened and soon desire was flowing between them. 

“What time do you have to be back on the planet?” she asked, tugging at the fastener for his uniform. 

“Not until 1700. We shall have another session and then an evening meal,” he said as he tangled one hand in her hair and stroked the other down her back. 

“Dixon Hill would call this a “nooner” or a “quickie” but given our current schedules I’ll take what we can get,” he told her as led her to the bedroom. They quickly divested themselves of the remainder of their clothes and lay down on the bed. 

As their lips met, passion reignited quickly. They were soon a flurry of limbs, caressing and stroking each other to a frenzy. 

The lovers were dozing contentedly when they were startled by the chirp of the comm followed by Riker’s voice, “Captain, did you want me to come to your quarters to review this week’s reports from the department heads? You said you wanted to look at them before you had to reporter back to the negotiations.”

“No,” it came out in a slightly panicked voice, causing Beverly to stifle a giggle by grabbing a handful of the sheet and bringing it to her mouth. Picard glared at her. “That will not be necessary, Number One. I shall meet you in my ready room in 10..make that 15 minutes. Picard out.”

“Sorry,” she said, although given her impish grin she looked anything but. 

“Would you rather I invited him to join us?” he said dryly.

She shook her head. “Although at some point I suppose the senior staff should be aware of our relationship.” She hadn’t told him that Deanna knew about Susannah. 

“Agreed, but I think we should share that information on our own time, and preferably in a different locale.”


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode tag for Coming of Age.

COMING OF AGE  
Wesley was on Relva VII completing another round of tests and Admiral Quinn’s assistant, Lt. Commander Dexter Remmick was interrogating the Enterprise senior staff. 

“Crusher to Picard”

“Picard here. What can I do for you doctor?”

“It’s not urgent, Captain but I’d like to speak with you. I can come to your ready room or you can drop by sickbay when you have a moment,” she said formally, unsure of his location or where he was located. It had become their custom to pointedly use their rank when addressing each other over comms unless they were sure the other person was alone. 

“I can come to sickbay as soon as I finish this report, maybe 15 minutes,” he replied. 

“I will see you then. Crusher out.

SICKBAY  
DR. CRUSHER’S OFFICER

Beverly sat at her desk finishing up the reminders to those crew who were due for their physicals in the next month when Picard entered. 

“Are you free now?” he inquired as he entered. 

“Yes,” she said, hitting send on her message. She looked up at him. “I truly try not to be judgmental Jean-Luc but I don’t care for Lt. Commander Remmick. He’s on a fishing expedition against you and I don’t like it.”

“You think it’s about me personally?” he asked. Despite being friends for many years, Admiral Gregory Quinn had refused to elaborate on his purpose for visiting the ship and allowing Remmick to conduct an investigation under the auspices of the Office of the Inspector General. “What did he ask you about?”

“My relationship with you, how I felt about serving with the man who, as he said, was responsible for the death of my husband. He assured me that everything I said was confidential and in a syrupy tone encouraged me to be ‘completely open’ with him.” 

Although Beverly was calm Picard knew her well enough to know that this questioning had likely set her seething. Being condescending was NOT a way to deal with this woman. He almost felt sorry for Remmick. 

“And how did you...respond?” Picard asked carefully.

“I explained that you were Susannah’s father and my lover and that I have never served with a finer officer,” she said with wide eyes. “Think it helped?’

Picard gave a short bark of laughter. “Sometimes you are terrifying, Beverly,” he said. “What did you really say?” 

“I told him we were Starfleet officers who had known each other for many years and that my personal feelings about you were irrelevant and none of his business.” Seeing his dubious look, she continued. “I was polite,” she insisted in response to his raised eyebrows. “Well I refrained from rolling my eyes and walking out in protest at the absurdity of it all.”

He sighed. It could have been worse. “Yes, neither of those actions would have helped matters,” he concurred. Beverly’s bedside manner was fantastic but she was no diplomat, nor did she suffer fools lightly. 

“What do you think he is after?” she asked. 

“I’m not sure. He’s been going through the ship’s logs and querying the crew about many of our missions. I can’t yet discern a real pattern, although he does seem to be fixated on my leadership rather than overall crew competence which I suppose is good.”

“Why is that good?” Beverly wanted to know. 

“I can defend myself. I’ve no reason to apologize for any of my actions as captain.”

Beverly agreed with that, Picard’s competence and devotion to duty were unassailable in her opinion. Even when they disagreed she knew he acted in what he believed to be the best interests of his cres, Starfleet and the Federation. “Did he question you directly?”

“Only briefly and then I put a stop to it,” Picard said. 

It did not appear that he was going to elaborate so Beverly simply stared at him with her eyebrows raised. 

“He asked me about saving Wesley from the Edo. While it is true I technically violated the Prime Directive, I believe that it was adequately explained in my log and I believe I would have done the same for any member of the crew who was unjustly facing that sort of extreme and unwarranted punishment.”

Beverly again rolled her eyes. “He couldn’t honestly believe that you should have allowed a 15 year old boy to be executed for stepping on plants!”

“I think it was less about the specifics and more about him grasping for a reason to question my command decisions. Frankly, I’ve had enough. I’m going to go talk to Quinn. It is time to end this witch hunt. He can ask me what he wants to know.” Picard said definitively. 

Beverly nodded her agreement. 

OBSERVATION LOUNGE (Bold lines are from the script)   
Captain Picard entered the observation lounge to find Wesley staring out at the stars. Apparently coming here when they were upset was a family tradition Picard mused. “Mister Crusher? Why aren't you in your dress uniform for Admiral Quinn's farewell dinner?” he asked, addressing him formally since he was in uniform. 

“I... I didn't think it would be appropriate,” Wesley replied, not meeting the captain’s eyes. 

“Why not?” Picard queried him. 

“I failed, Captain. I didn't get into the Academy. I failed you...and the Enterprise,” Wesley admitted. 

“Ridiculous. Did you do your best?” Picard challenged. 

After thinking about it a moment, Wesley nodded. 

“When you test next year -- and you will test again -- do you think your performance will improve? Picard inquired. 

Wes thought about the lessons he had learned. “Well, yes…”

Picard nodded as he walked over to Wesley. “ Good. The only person you're truly competing against is  
yourself.”

“Then you're not disappointed?” Wesley asked. 

PIcard put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Your failures and successes have to be measured within, Wesley. Not by me or anyone else... But if it helps you to know this, I failed my first time. And you  
may not tell anyone! Including your mother.” 

Wesley gazed at him in shock. “You? You failed?”

Picard nodded. “Yes. But not the second time. Now, do me the honor of sitting next to me at dinner. I'm going to have to disappoint an old friend.” Picard knew that despite their friendship and the appeal of melding young minds at the academy, his place was here on the Enterprise.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Susannah decides she wants to change her name. Beverly and Jean-Luc talk about what that will mean.

CRUSHER QUARTERS  
Beverly and Susannah were picking up the living area of their quarters before dinner when Susannah said, "Mom my birthday is in two weeks." 

"I know, what would you like to do?"

"I want to have a sleepover with Michelle but that's not what I wanted to ask you about," she said.

Beverly heard the trepidation in her voice, surprising because while Susannah was often quiet, she was almost always confident when she spoke.

"I want to change my name. I want to be Susannah Picard."

Inwardly Beverly sighed. She knew that this was coming, knew it was the right thing but also knew it would not be easy.

"We need to talk to your father," she told her.

Susannah frowned. "Do you think he won't want me to be a Picard?"

Beverly hugged her daughter. "I think he will be very pleased. He loves you very much. It's just that the logistics are a bit complicated and because he's the Captain and I'm his Chief Medical Officer it will be a topic of gossip."

"I'm tired of it being a secret Mom. It's hard to always remember to call him Captain when we're outside of our quarters. When the other kids talk about what their families do at night or on the weekends I have to be so careful." 

Beverly saw the sadness and frustration in her daughter's eyes. 

"What we've asked of you hasn't been fair Susannah. We"ll fix it as best we can. I need you to know that we love you very much and we will get through this as a family but it may not be easy at first."

"Is Papa part of our family?"

"He's your father so of course he is," Beverly replied with a soft smile.

Susannah looked thoughtful. "Mom, do you like him?"

Beverly raised an eyebrow. "Of course I like him, Susannah. We're friends and we are in this parenting thing together now."

"That's not what I mean Mom. Sometimes you look at each other or touch each other and..." her 9 year old brain struggled to articulate what she observed. "It looks like people who are dating or married," she finally said. 

Beverly knew this was the curse of smart children. They always picked up on what you thought was subtle. 

"That's complicated honey," she said.

"Why is our life so complicated, Mom?" Susannah asked in exasperation. 

Beverly laughed and hugged her again. "Honestly, because of the decisions your father and I made before you were born, and because of our jobs. But maybe I make it more than it is." She thought for a moment. "Susannah your father and I love you and we care about each other very much."

"So are you dating?"

"We are exploring a relationship. Dating at our age sounds a little silly I think."

"Is it a secret too?" Susannah asked.

"It's...private," she said carefully. 

"Even from us?" Susannah persevered.

Beverly chewed on her lip. "Honey, we didn't want to involve you in case it doesn't work out. No matter what happens between Jean-Luc and me, we will always love you and work together as parents."

"I want you to stay together. I think I'd like us to live together as a family. I miss Papa when he's not here," Susannah said. 

"I know baby, and maybe one day we will but I'm not ready yet. Your father and I have been independent a long time. He is used to having privacy and quiet and making his own choices. Living with us would be a big change."

"And he doesn't want that?" Susannah asked, and Beverly heard the disappointment in her voice. 

"No, he didn't say that. I think in some ways he'd really like to live with us. I'm just not sure that it would work," Beverly explained.

"So YOU don't want him to be here," Susannah said, a tinge of anger in her voice now.

"I'm just not ready for that yet," Beverly said. "I'm not saying no Susannah, I am saying that we, all of us, but especially Jean-Luc and I need to spend more time together, build a more solid foundation before we take a step like that," Beverly explained. “That is a serious commitment and it is important that we not rush into it. But we will talk to him about changing your name.”

Susannah nodded. Like her father, she was capable of biding her time and wearing her mother down to get what she wanted. 

CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS 

Picard was reading reports when his door chimed. “Come,” he called, rising from his desk to greet his visitor. 

Beverly walked in with a serious look on her face. “Jean-Luc, we need to talk, are you free?”

“Of course,” he said, shutting down his terminal. He gestured to the couch and they sat. 

Beverly was wringing her hands and he could tell she was distressed. “Susannah wants to change her name,” Beverly told him. “She wants to be Susannah Picard.” 

Jean-Luc nodded and smiled. “On a personal level, I am very pleased, Beverly. I am proud of her and I love her. On a professional level, I know this may be complicated for us both.” He placed his hand over Beverly’s. 

“I know. I wish I could protect her, both of them, from what people will say. You know it won’t all be nice,” Beverly said. Picard nodded in agreement. “Susannah told me how hard it is for her to keep this secret though and I realize we, I, haven’t been fair in asking her to.” There was sadness in her voice.   
“No, I suppose that is a lot to ask of a little girl and none of this is her responsibility, it is ours,” Picard said. 

Beverly sighed. “I thought I knew what it would be like, coming here, seeing you, letting you build a relationship with Susannah…..”

“It is never quite the same in our minds, is it?” he asked. 

She shook her head. “Logically I knew it would be hard. I knew it would be emotional but still listening to her articulate what it has been like was upsetting. I didn’t mean for it to be like this.”

“Beverly, we both made mistakes but it is nothing that can’t be fixed. People will lose interest in the gossip.”

“You’re right and I know that she, and you, have the right to make this choice. We’ll get through it,” she said. 

“We could really give them something to talk about if you would move in with me, or better yet marry me,” Picard said, stroking her cheek and placing a soft kiss on her lips. 

Beverly laid her head on his shoulder. “That would make Susannah happy,” she told him. 

“Have you told her that we are seeing each other as more than friends?” Picard asked. 

“Not exactly but I did tell her that we are exploring our relationship. She wants us to live together but I told her I’m not ready,” she admitted.

Picard kissed her forehead. “I’m not going anywhere Beverly, when you’re ready, I’ll be here.”

“I know. I did talk to Wes about us,” she told him. 

“And what did Wesley have to say?”

“Well mostly I think he wanted me to stop talking, especially after I made him admit that he knew we were sleeping together,” she told him with a laugh. Jean-Luc looked at her in surprise. “He’s known since that first night I spent here. He was already up when I returned that morning, and changing clothes did not fool him although he pretended not to notice. He’s also come home in the evening when you were still in my room,” she told him. 

“I can imagine that a teenage boy does not want to talk about his mother’s sex life,” Picard admitted. “I sure would not have wanted to.”

“Well once we got that bit out of the way he said that he was all right with our relationship, that he just wants me to be happy.”

“I know he can be a bit awkward Beverly but he has a good heart and he loves you and Susannah very much.”

“Yes, he’s tried so hard to be mature, to always be responsible. I know he’s tried to be the man of the house in some ways, although I don’t think he even realizes it,” she told Picard. “I warned him that some people might think that he was made an acting ensign because of our relationship,” she said. 

Picard frowned. “I hadn’t thought of that. He earned that position and my awarding it to him had nothing to do with my relationship with you or Susannah,” he said.

“I know that, and he does too but we both know others may not see it that way,” Beverly told him. 

“You’re right and I suppose it is best that he be prepared for the gossip,” Picard admitted. 

“I never really lied to the kids about you but I wasn’t honest either and I feel like that was the wrong decision. I’ve committed to being as honest as I can with them now,” Beverly said. “It might be harder initially but I think it is the right choice in the long run.”

“I agree. Speaking of honesty, we will need to tell the senior staff about Susannah and I’d better give Admiral Quinn a heads-up as well. Our friends deserve to hear it from us.”

“Yes,” Beverly agreed. “Once I process the paperwork and Susannah tells her friends at school it will be all over the ship in a matter of days if not hours.”


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> News spreads. Picard tells Admiral Quinn, Beverly tells her in-laws and Susannah spills the news to a friend.

CAPTAIN’S READY ROOM   
“Admiral Quinn, for you sir,” came the message over the comm.

“Put him through,” Picard replied. 

“Admiral, it is good to see you. I hope you are doing well.” Quinn nodded. “What can I do for you captain?” 

“Gregory, I need to tell you about some paperwork that will be coming across your desk. It is in regards to my daughter.”

“I didn’t know you had a daughter, Jean-Luc.,” he said, a slight frown on his face.

“Neither did I for quite a while but I have become aware and she has asked to change her last name to Picard and I have agreed.”

“Congratulations appear to be in order then. I am happy for you. Who may I ask is her mother?” Quinn asked. 

“That is where it gets a bit complicated. Her mother is Dr. Beverly Crusher, my Chief Medical Officer.”

“That IS complicated. If I recall, you objected to her posting on the Enterprise, is this why?” he asked. 

“I didn’t actually know about Susannah at that time but Beverly and I had not parted on good terms. Beverly is an excellent doctor and her professional skills were never in question. We have reconciled personally and I have greatly enjoyed getting to know Susannah. I am pleased to recognize her publicly but I understand that there may be gossip, disparaging the doctor and/or myself.”

“There may well be,” Quinn agreed. He thought for a moment and said, “I think your doctor will hold up. If I recall the report correctly, she held her own rather well against Commander Remmick. In fact, he wanted to debrief her in more depth and I persuaded him to let her alone.” 

Picard chuckled. “Beverly has a temper and I believe Commander Remmick provoked it. She found his questions insulting and overly personal. She is not one to conceal her emotions. She would be the first to tell you that she is a physician, not a diplomat.”

“That should make your life interesting, given that you are one of the most controlled men I’ve ever known,” Quinn said. 

“Indeed. She keeps me on my toes,” Picard agreed.

“Do I take that to mean that there is more between you than co-parenting?” Quinn asked, “Speaking as your friend, not an admiral of course.”

“That remains to be seen Gregory. I believe the lady can be persuaded but it may be a lengthy operation,” Picard said with a small smile. 

“It’s a good thing you are a patient man then I suppose,” replied Quinn. “I will make sure your paperwork is processed quickly and with as little fanfare as much as I can manage.”

“Thank you. It is much appreciated,” Picard told him. 

“Of course Jean-Luc. I will expect to meet your family next time I am on the Enterprise,” Quinn informed him. 

“It would be my pleasure, Gregory. Have a good evening,” he said as he signed off. 

CRUSHER QUARTERS  
Beverly had taken her lunch break in her quarters because she needed to make a subspace call and she wanted privacy. The Enterprise was now in range of Vulcan where her in-laws lived and she knew having sent in Susannah’s name change paperwork that morning that she owed it to the Crushers to speak with them personally. They were her family and had been good to her and the children through everything. Jack had not had any siblings so they had treated Beverly as a daughter and supported her when Jack died, and to her delight and surprise when Susannah was born.

Still, despite everything, Beverly felt nervous as her mother-in-law's face appeared on the screen.

“Beverly! How wonderful to see you. How have you been? Still enjoying all your adventures on the Enterprise?”

“Maryanne, it’s good to see you too. We are doing well, kids are loving the school here and Wes is working hard as an ensign. He wasn’t selected for the academy this year but he will continue to get experience here and will be sitting for the test again next year.”

“You weren’t really ready to let him to anyway, were you?” Maryanne asked knowingly. 

“No, I don’t suppose so but I’m not sure another year will change that,” Beverly admitted. 

“It is always hard for parents to have their children grow up,” Maryanne said in understanding. “Speaking of the children, where are they?”

“They’re in school. I...I needed to speak with you and John privately. Is he home?”

“Yes,” she looked behind her and called out to her husband to join her. “You look serious Beverly, is everything all right?”

“Yes, just complicated. I’ll explain it.”

Jonathan Crusher, a professor of Geology at the Vulcan Science Academy, came into view. Beverly smiled when she saw him. Whereas both Jack and Wesley got their coloring from their dark-haired mother, their eyes and smile looked back at her from John’s kind face.

“Beverly,” he boomed, “how is my favorite daughter?”

“I’m good but I have some news I need to share with you.”

The Crushers sat side by side in front of the monitor and Beverly could tell by the position of their arms that they were holding hands.

“It’s not bad, I promise, just serious and probably something I should have told you a long time ago,” she assured them. Beverly took a deep breath and started. “One of the reasons I requested the posting on the Enterprise is that Susannah’s father is on board. They’ve met and their relationship is going well, so well in fact that Susannah has asked to change her last name to her father’s.”

Maryanne’s hand flew to her mouth as she gasped in surprise. “Beverly! You said that her father didn’t want her.”

“What I said was that he didn’t want a family and that is what he’d always said but I realized that it wasn’t fair to him or Susannah not to let them meet.” She took another breath. “Her father is Jean-Luc Picard.”

John’s head snapped back in shock. “Jean-Luc? And he abandoned you? When you were pregnant? How could he do that?” 

The Crusher family had known Jean-Luc for years. As one of Jack’s best friends and his commanding officer and lacking family connections of his own, he had joined them on shore leave and visits more than once and had been Jack’s best man at his wedding to Beverly. 

“It wasn’t exactly like that. He didn’t know I was pregnant,” Beverly said quietly. 

“You didn’t tell him!” Maryanne exclaimed. 

“No, at the time it seemed like the right choice. You know he never wanted a family and we...well we didn’t part on the best terms. He thought our relationship was inappropriate because of Jack and because of the age difference. I actually tried to call him before I even knew about Susannah and he didn’t respond. By the time I realized I was pregnant I thought it was too late and I thought I knew how he would respond.” Beverly now felt embarrassed by her decision. She could see the dismay and shock on the faces of these two people who loved her like their own daughter. “I should have told you, I’m sorry.” 

John saw the pain and tears in her eyes. “How did he respond when he found out?”

“He was angry with me but he knew he’d not given me any cause to think he would want to be a father. We’ve worked it out now though and he adores Susannah.” She smiled. “I actually didn’t realize how alike they are until I saw them together. He’s good to Wesley too. He doesn’t try to step into Jack’s shoes as an authority figure really but he tries to give him guidance and support. Wes respects him and they get along well.”

“So Susannah wants to be called Susannah Picard now? And Jean-Luc is ok with that?” Maryanne asked. 

“Yes and yes. Actually, I think he is happy. He has worked really hard to build a relationship with her. He comes over for dinner and takes her to the holodeck to go horseback riding and do other things. He’s even pitched in when I’ve had a lot of work.”

John nodded. “So he is fulfilling his responsibilities now?”

Beverly smiled gently and nodded. “He’s a good father John. It doesn’t come as naturally to him but he works at it. He loves her.”

John smiled back, “We’ve always trusted your judgment Beverly, you’re a good mom and we support you and him if you say we should.”

“Thank you. I know I’ve made my share of mistakes but I’ve tried to fix this one as best I can,” she said. She heard a chime in the background and John stood up.

“Beverly, I have to go as I have a lecture but have the kids call us later, will you? I miss their faces,” he said.

“We’ll call tomorrow night if that works,” Beverly agreed and he nodded. 

As he headed out Maryanne turned back to the screen.

“Let’s hear the rest of it Beverly.”

“What? The identity of Susannah’s father isn’t enough for today?”

“No. I want to know what happened between you and what is going on between you now,” Maryanne said, turning her mother’s eye on Beverly.

“It’s all complicated. I fell in love with him after Jack died. He was the only one who seemed to understand, who didn’t run away from my grief. So many of my friends disappeared. They didn’t know what to say and I reminded them of the risk inherent in Starfleet life. Jean-Luc felt so guilty about Jack’s accident. I knew Jack wouldn’t have wanted him to feel that way. We exchanged messages for months and then when he came by on shore leave...well, you know what happened then,” Beverly said.

“Yes, and as I told you before, Jack wouldn’t have wanted you to shut yourself away. He wouldn’t have been opposed to you finding love again. I think it amazed him that every man wasn’t in love with you!”

Beverly smiled. “That’s because Jack knew how to stay on my good side! He was such a happy man, so open and loving. I know that was because of how he was raised. He had no trouble giving unconditional love because he’d always had it. I loved him so much. I still do love him. Falling in love with Jean-Luc didn’t change that.”

“I know. What I don’t understand is why you let Jean-Luc slip away.”

“I guess I didn’t know how to fight for him. I let him freeze me out. In some ways it was easier than risking my heart again I guess. I could focus on the kids and not think about him, or any man.”

“How’s that working out now?” Maryanne asked shrewdly. She knew Jean-Luc Picard well enough to know that when he did something he did it with all he had. She doubted that having a family would be an exception to that. 

“He’s a good father, attentive, caring. He’s not as demonstrative as Jack but he’s affectionate in his own way.”

“I meant with you, not with Susannah,” Maryanne pressed as she watched the color rise in Beverly’s cheeks. She laughed, “That good, huh?”

“Maryanne!”

“Beverly, I’m an old woman but I’m not dead. Jean-Luc Picard is a very handsome man and you are a beautiful young woman. I seem to recall you and Jack slipping away at every opportunity and you’ve been alone so long.” Her smile was gentle but her eyes were alight with humor. 

“We are working to parent Susannah and he’s my commanding officer,” Beverly deflected.

“So what?” Maryanne asked and Beverly sighed.

“So in our...personal relationship we are taking it slow,” Beverly said after a pause.

“Is that your choice or his?”

“You’re relentless. I’m glad you weren’t my mom when I was a teenager,” Beverly said, shaking her head.

“I am, so answer the question!”

“More mine than his I suppose but as I told Susannah it is important to build a strong foundation if we want our relationship to last.”

“I understand that but Beverly, love doesn’t always make sense, relationships are hard work and we both know too well that bad things can happen. Don’t let happiness pass you by because you’re afraid.”

Beverly nodded. “I’m working on it. We just have a lot to think about it.”

Maryanne smiled at her. “Beverly, you deserve love and to be happy. We’ll talk to you and the children tomorrow, ok?”

“Yes, we’ll call after dinner,” she agreed. 

CAPTAIN’S READY ROOM  
The day after Beverly sent off Susannah’s paperwork to Starfleet, the Enterprise had been called to assist the recovery efforts for Lanara III which had experienced a significant earthquake. Although the society had warp drive, and their technology was somewhat limited. The medical and technological expertise of Starfleet would go a long way towards saving lives and repairing the community. 

Beverly had spent most of the last week on the surface so Picard had been picking up Susannah from child care and staying in their quarters with the children. When personnel had to work extra shifts or be deployed for emergencies, child care was available 24 hours a day. Depending on how many people were involved in the efforts, it almost became like a party for the children. Picard had tried to get her each night by 2000 hours so that she could get to bed at a reasonable time. 

Tonight, her friend Michelle’s mom had asked Susannah to join them for dinner and to play and Beverly had agreed. Jean-Luc knew that Susannah was pleased to spend time one on one with her friend, especially after the chaos of the last few days. He could finish the rest of his reports on Beverly’s terminal so he shut down for the evening and left to fetch his daughter. 

MARSTERS’ FAMILY QUARTERS  
The captain rang at Lt. Marster’s quarters and was quickly admitted. 

Michelle’s mother, Lt. Amelia Marster’s, welcomed him into their quarters. She was clearing the table from dinner. 

“The girls are playing in Michelle’s room. They’ve been very good and I made sure they finished their homework,” she told him. 

“Thank you. I am sure she much preferred it to being in child care for the evening. Susannah tends to prefer smaller groups to larger ones and it was quite noisy when I picked her up last night,” Picard said with a smile. 

“Is Dr. Crusher going to have to spend the night on the planet again?”

“I believe that is her plan. She is very hands-on with the rescue efforts and although her staff is very well-trained she prefers to see to certain things herself,” Picard told her. 

“Captain, Susannah said something that I think you should know about,” Lt. Marsters said. Picard can see that she is fidgeting with her fingers nervously. “I don’t think she meant anything by it and I’m sure she is a little stressed right now with her mom gone.” The Lt.’s voice drifted off and she looked anxiously at Picard. 

“Lt. I am not going to be angry with you for something that m..that Susannah said,” he told her gently. 

The Lieutenant sighed, “Yes, sir. Susannah told Michelle that....well she told her that you’re her...father,....her biological father. I know that she looks up to you and that you are close to her family and I don’t think she quite understands…” she drifted off again and stared at her hands. “I just thought you should know.”

“Lieutenant, it’s all right.” He cleared his throat. “Susannah is my daughter. In fact, we are in the process of having her birth certificate reissued with Picard as her last name - as this was her wish. It is a complicated situation but it will be made public shortly. I would, however, appreciate your discretion until Dr. Crusher and I can make an announcement to the senior staff and speak with Susannah’s teachers.”

Lt. Martyrs looked dumbfounded. “Of course sir, of course. We won’t say anything. I will make sure that Michelle understands.”

“Thank you, Lt. I appreciate all that you and your family have done to make Susannah feel welcome, especially while her mother is so busy.”

“It was our pleasure, sir. She is a wonderful child. I’m sure you know that” she babbled. 

“Yes, Susannah is very special,” Picard said a full smile on his face. 

She smiled in return. “I’ll get the girls,” and she headed towards the bedrooms at the back of the cabin.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beverly and Jean-Luc tell the senior staff and Will and Deanna talk about the ramifications for their friends.

OBSERVATION LOUNGE  
SENIOR STAFF MEETING

Having completed their work after the earthquake and briefed the staff on their next mission, Picard turned the meeting to personal concerns. He and Beverly had agreed that it was important that they inform the senior staff personally about Susannah’s parentage and pending name change. They had decided that Beverly would take the lead in broaching the issue and they would field questions together.

“Before we adjourn, Dr. Crusher and I have some information that we believe is important that we share with you before it becomes a topic of scuttlebutt. Dr. Crusher,” he said, offering her the floor. 

Beverly took a deep breath and faced her friends. Deanna’s encouraging smile helped her get started. “As some of you may have realized, Susannah and Wesley do not have the same biological father. At the time of her birth, her father and I were not in contact and I gave her the last name Crusher so that it would be the same as the rest of the family. She has recently established a relationship with her father and they have agreed that she can change her last name to his. We have submitted the paperwork to Starfleet to officially change her name to Susannah,” she looked at Jean-Luc who nodded, “Picard. We expect it to be finalized in the next few days at which point we will tell her teachers and her name will be updated in the crew roster”

Deanna’s smile had grown and looking at Jean-Luc, she saw that his lips had a small but definite upturn to them as well. Riker looked surprised but happy. This explained A LOT. He narrowed his eyes at Deanna, and taking in her soft smile, became sure that this was not news to the counselor. 

Worf’s expression did not falter but his head did cock to the side slightly indicating that he was thinking about this new information. He nodded in acknowledgment but in his taciturn way, said nothing. 

Geordi, easy-going, happy soul that he was, smiled broadly and said, “That’s great Captain. I’ve not spent all that much time with her but she seems like a wonderful kid and Wes speaks highly of her.” 

Tasha smiled at Beverly and then turned to look at the Captain. “I don’t know much about families or fathers sir, but I’m sure Susannah is lucky that you are hers.” Beverly smiled back as her in thanks. 

Data, with his trademark curiosity began to speak, “I see from her file that Susannah Crusher was born approximately 23 months after the death of Lt. Jack Crusher. So you and Captain Picard became involved approximately 13 months after his death and this union produced your daughter. Are you in a sexual relationship now? Will you be sharing quarters?” 

Beverly decided that this one was entirely Jean-Luc’s call and she looked pointedly at him. “Mr. Data, the purpose of our discussion today is not to discuss the past or present status of my personal relationship with Dr. Crusher, but to inform you that my daughter will be taking my name. We are aware that this will cause interest and discussion amongst the crew. We do not choose to disclose any other personal details at this time. Thank you for respecting our privacy.”

Picard knew that this would not be the last he heard of this issue but it was all he was willing to say at this point, at least until Beverly was prepared to make their relationship more official and permanent. 

TROI’S QUARTERS  
When her door chimed shortly after the end of shift, she knew who would be waiting for her and sure enough, when she called “Come,” Commander Will Riker strode in. 

“Hello, Will,” she said. “Would you like something to drink?” she invited. 

“Sure, synthehol Ale,” he replied 

Deanna ordered that and a glass of white synthehol wine for herself and they sat on her couch. 

Will took a sip of his beer and said, “You knew.” His voice held only a tinge of accusation but she heard it. “Why didn’t you tell me?”  
“It wasn’t my place to tell you. I suspected it when Susannah came to the bridge and then when the children were kidnapped and held on Aldea but when I was...pregnant, Beverly confirmed it,” she told him. 

He nodded. “I mean it all makes sense now that I think about it but I was still pretty shocked. I knew there was something between them but I didn’t guess it was this.”

“From what Beverly told me it has been a complicated road and they will need our support when the crew hears this news,” Deanna told him.

“Yes, people do love to gossip and you’ve got to admit, the secret love child of the captain and the chief medical officer is pretty juicy gossip.”

“It is if you forget that there are real people involved, some of them children,” Deanna admonished gently. 

“That wasn’t how I meant it,” Riker was a bit indignant. “It seems like the captain is happy about it so that’s a good thing. Do you think he and Beverly will make a go of their relationship?”

“I don’t know. I suppose when they are ready for us to know their status in that regard they will tell us,” she replied. 

“If there was nothing to tell then the captain would have said that so there’s clearly something going on. We knew that before. You can’t miss the way they watch each other when they think the other isn’t looking,” Riker told her. 

Deanna smiled. “And why were you noticing that? Did you try and hit on Beverly?” Deanna asked, knowing Riker’s usual reaction to attractive women. She was surprised she hadn’t realized this before. 

“No...well not really. Frankly, when we met on Farpoint Station she and Wes made it pretty clear she wasn’t interested in dating,” he admitted. 

Deanna laughed. “It’s always shocking to you that some women are immune to your charms isn’t it?”

Riker frowned at her. “I think that’s a little unfair,” he defended himself. “I’m just a social guy. Unlike our captain who is usually quite reticent. In fact, now that I think about it, virtually the only times I’ve seen him at the events in Ten-Forward is when he is with Dr. Crusher.”

Thinking carefully about what she could share that wouldn’t be breaking a confidence Deanna said, “From what Beverly told me, he was much more social with his crew on the Stargazer, at least before Jack Crusher died. They were close, like brothers, she told me and I think his death hit the captain hard.”

“Guess that explains why his relationship with Beverly is so complicated too,” Riker allowed. “You don’t think they had an affair do you?” It seemed out of character for both Picard and Beverly but love could make people do crazy things. 

“No, I don’t and Beverly said as much. I know that she is concerned that people might think that, and he probably is too,” Deanna said. 

“What do you think we can do?” Riker asked. Will Riker was nothing if not a loyal friend and crewmate. 

“We can show that we accept their relationship in front of the crew by not treating them any differently, especially Wesley. Beverly is concerned about how the crew may treat him,” Deanna said. 

“Another angle I hadn’t really thought about. Anyone who has worked with Wes knows he’s an acting ensign because he’s brilliant but I can see people being jealous. I think some people are already jealous and this hasn’t even come out,” Riker shook his head. “What about Susannah?”

“I don’t know. I sense that she loves the captain very much, in that way children have but they are still exploring that relationship. Her personality is much like her father actually, quietly self-confident. She seems to be a natural leader from what her teachers say but I’m sure being the captain’s daughter won’t be easy either,” Deanna said. 

Riker rose, “Let me know what you think we can do,” he said. “Also, care t join Geordi and I for the concert tomorrow? Data is going to be playing.”

“That sounds lovely,” Deanna said as she walked him to the door.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The family has their first public outing in Ten-Forward, Beverly and Deanna talk and Beverly and Jean-Luc discuss their future and celebrate the evening.

TEN-FORWARD  
Beverly and Jean-Luc often attended shipboard functions together so seeing them enter the lounge together did not usually raise any eyebrows. Today was different. As soon as they entered there was an obvious and brief lull in the conversations around the entire room. Beverly stole a look at her companion and saw the tight set of his jaw. He was not fond of being the subject of gossip but it was to be expected. Susannah’s paperwork had been processed and she had started using her new name at school the day before. Given the pace of scuttlebutt on a ship, they were right on time. 

"Good evening," said Guinan, walking over to their end of the bar. "What can I get you?"

"Something strong enough to get us through the evening," Beverly said with a knowing smile. 

Guinan nodded. "Yes, being the center of attention is not the captain's favorite activity,” she said with a glance at Picard. 

"Perhaps it would be best if we skipped the concert this evening," he chimed in.

"Oh no, that will make it worse," Beverly told him. 

"So we are to be stared at like fish in a tank all evening?" His consternation with the situation was obvious.

"Yes, and I'm getting the kids to join us," Beverly responded. 

"No, there's no need to subject them to this," he countered.

"Jean-Luc it will be far easier to simply put the speculation to an end, show them we are a happy family," Beverly said.

Guinan looked at Picard and nodded her agreement. "Listen to her Captain. She's right."

Picard finally nodded his acquiescence.

Beverly tapped her comm badge, "Dr. Crusher to Ensign Crusher."

"Ensign Crusher here."

"Wes, I want you and Susannah to join us for dinner in Ten-Forward."

"Mom, I have a lot of homework, can we do it another time?"

"No Wes, tonight. You can go as soon as we finish eating."

"Ok. We'll be there in a few minutes," Wes replied, sounding a bit annoyed.

"Let's get a table," Beverly said.

Picard nodded and gestured to one in the back corner but Guinan shook her head. "Not tonight." She redirected them to a table just off to one side but far closer to the middle of the room than he would like. He shot a look at the two women but proceeded to the indicated table and took a seat. 

Beverly took the seat to his left and they waited for Guinan to bring their drinks. "We knew this would happen. It will blow over quickly if we can show them we all accept the situation."

"All right. I just wish there was an easier, less conspicuous way to handle it," he said. 

"I would think that dinner with me and the kids, followed by a concert of some of your favorite music, would be a pretty good way to spend the evening," she teased. She lowered her voice and added with a wink, "If you behave I might even be persuaded to walk you home and tuck you in."

"Then I best do as I'm bid," he replied, giving her a small smile.

While the other patrons couldn't hear them, their smiles and intimate body language spoke volumes. Though they were in uniform and were careful to keep an appropriate distance between them, their connection was evident. Most onlookers were further delighted when Wes and Susannah entered and headed towards their parents. From her vantage point, Beverly saw several crew members openly watching and smiling as Susannah came up and gave Jean-Luc a hug. He responded by pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. It was hard to resist the pretty girl who had clearly captivated the curmudgeonly captain. 

Guinan walked over with a tray and handed everyone a drink, some kind of mixed drinks for the adults, juice for Susannah, and a sparkling beverage similar to old-Earth soda for Wesley. “It’s nice to have you all here tonight. What would you like to eat?”

“What are our choices?” asked Susannah cagily. She was well aware that Ten-Forward offered specialty options not available from the replicators. 

Guinan smiled broadly. This child was going to give Picard a run for his money. “I have Andorian scallops, fresh beef burgers from Moltava and three-cheese tortellini handmade in Italy. Does one of those sounds good?” she inquired. 

“A burger! With sweet potato fries?” Susannah proclaimed. Guinan nodded. 

Wes put in an order for a burger as well, Beverly ordered the scallops and Picard chose the pasta. Guinan headed to the kitchen to place their order. 

As Guinan departed, Beverly turned to the children. “We are going to have a nice dinner. Word has gotten out about Susannah’s name change so you may notice that people are looking at us. There’s nothing we can do about it but show them that we are having a nice time. Do you have any questions?”

Wes shook his head. Picard could see that he was not happy but respected the young man for complying with his mother’s wishes. 

Susannah frowned. “I just don’t get why anyone else cares. Some of the kids and school thought I was lying until the teachers started calling me Susannah Picard. Madeline wanted to know if I get special privileges and don’t have to do my work because my Dad is the captain and Thomas called Mom a name and he got in big trouble,” she said.

“What did Thomas say?” asked Picard, his eyes narrowing and a furrow forming between his eyebrows. 

“I’m sure it was handled appropriately by the teachers,” Beverly told him, the tone of warning clear in her voice. She was not going to let the conversation devolve in this way. Nor was she going to tell Jean-Luc get upset by name-calling children. People could say what they wanted but she wasn’t going to let ugliness infect her family or their dinner, especially in the middle of the lounge. 

“Susannah, what was your favorite thing you did at school today?” Beverly asked, changing the subject. 

Susannah excitedly launched into a description of an experiment they had conducted in science class that day. 

As she was wrapping up her tale, Will Riker walked into Ten-Forward and spied the family. He walked over to the table. 

“Good evening, Captain, Dr. Crusher, Ensign and...Miss Picard is it?” he asked Susannah with a grin and a wink. 

She nodded shyly. “Yes.”

Just then, a server appeared with their food. “Looks good,” Riker commented. 

“Would you like to join us?” Beverly invited. Jean-Luc looked at her sideways and she simply smiled. 

“Thank you for the offer but I’m supposed to meet Deanna and Geordi. Will you be staying for the concert?”

“We will,” Beverly told him, “but I think the kids have homework.”

“I don’t, Mom. Can I stay?” asked Susannah. 

“This isn’t usually your kind of music Susannah and it runs pretty long. What if you stayed through the first three pieces and then went to bed?” Beverly offered. She was pretty sure this was more about getting to spend time with her parents than it was about any interest in the performance. 

Susannah nodded. “Okay, but if I like it and I’m not tired, can I stay longer?”

“We’ll see,” Beverly allowed. 

“You have work, Wes?” Riker asked. 

“Yes, I have a paper due next week for the stellar cartography class I am taking as part of my academy curriculum,” Wes explained. Riker could see that the young man was struggling a bit and thought he might know the cause. 

“Well then I expect you had better get to work on it as I know that Chief Engineer LaForge is counting on you to help him with those upgrades to the tractor beams tomorrow,” Riker commented, just loud enough for his words to carry to the tables closest to them. 

“Yes, sir,” Wes responded, a slight smile on his face. “I’m really looking forward to it. I showed him some ideas I had about making the power usage more efficient and he said we could run some simulations to see how they worked in real-time.”

“Excellent, Ensign. Your initiative is always appreciated,” Will said with an easy smile. Across the room, Deanna and Geordi entered and walked over to join Riker. 

“Hello,” said Deanna as they approached. “It looks like Guinan has found you some extra special items tonight,” she commented, surveying their food. 

Susannah who adored the counselor nodded. “It’s a real beef burger and she made sweet potato fries especially for me - they’re the best!” 

“Maybe I’ll try it myself,” Deanna said with a smile. Turning to the gentlemen with her she said, “I suggest we get a table and order our own food if we want to eat before the concert starts,” she told them. 

After they finished their dinner, Wes headed for their quarters and Susannah followed her parents over to the chairs that had been set up for the concert. She claimed a seat between the two of them but pushed her chair just a bit closer to her father’s. Jean-Luc smiled at her and spoke quietly to her. 

“Susannah, you know you must be quiet during the music. If you get tired you can squeeze my hand and we will let you know when you can leave. Some of the pieces are a bit long so you might have to wait for a break,” he told her. 

She nodded. The privilege of getting to stay for the adult event had her on her best behavior. She sat contentedly through the first two pieces but started to get sleepy during the third, just as her mother had predicted. Instead of squeezing her father’s hand though she scooted to the edge of her chair and leaned into his side. He wrapped his arm around her and she cuddled into his side. 

Beverly wasn’t sure if this would increase or decrease the gossip but she knew Susannah was putting on a show. She had a feeling far more people were watching the Picard-Crusher clan than the musicians. At the end of the third selection, there was a brief lull and she whispered to Susannh, “I think it is time for you to head home to bed. Do you need me to walk you there?”

Susannah shook her head, “How about if Papa takes me?”

Beverly cocked her head and crooked her eyebrow at her daughter, wondering what she was up to. It was like she was staking out her territory. Jean-Luc caught Beverly’s eye, “I’ll take her, you stay and enjoy the music. I won’t be long.” Beverly nodded as this was certainly not the time or place for a discussion. 

Hand in hand she watched Jean-Luc escort their daughter out of the room. She felt sure that every eye in the lounge was on them. 

True to his word, he returned in about 15 minutes and once there was a break in the music, he retook his seat. The two shared a look but did not speak until the concert concluded. 

Picard approached the musicians, thanking them for a lovely evening. The young female Lieutenant who had played the piano said bravely, “Your little girl is adorable, did she like it?”

“Thank you. I believe that she did, it was just getting to be her bedtime,” he responded with a soft smile. 

Beverly and Deanna had walked over to the bar for another drink so they didn’t hear this exchange. When Picard joined them he was smiling and Deanna could feel he was at ease which she felt was positive given his obvious discomfort earlier. 

“Did Susannah go down all right?” Beverly asked, turning away from Deanna.

“Yes, she was pretty tired so she just brushed her teeth and went to bed,” he confirmed. “Are you ready to go?”

“I am, but I’m not sure walking out of here together is the way to decrease gossip,” she said. Jean-Luc frowned at her. 

“Why don’t you go, I’ll finish my drink with Deanna and I’ll join you in ten minutes or so,” she suggested. 

He sighed. “I’m the captain of the flagship and I have to sneak around my own ship, seems absurd,” he said. 

“If that’s your attitude I can just go back to my quarters,” she said. 

“Your plan is agreeable,” he said and he headed out. .

“Beverly, are you sure this is the best way to handle this?” Deanna asked as they walked to a quiet table in the back where they wouldn’t be overheard. 

“For the moment, yes,” she said. “Susannah said that a boy in her class called me a name and he got in big trouble,’ she said with raised eyebrows. “I’m sure we can imagine what was said.”

“And you think hiding your relationship will somehow make that kind of thing stop?”

“No, it will have to burn itself out, but flaunting our relationship would fuel the fire,” Beverly said. 

“I’m not so sure about that. Judging from what I sensed, people like the idea that you are a happy family. I think you would find a lot more support than you are thinking,” Deanna said.

“Regardless, I’m not ready to go public at this point,” Beverly said. 

Deanna nodded. “Will came to see me after the staff meeting. He could tell that I wasn’t all that surprised. You never told me that he asked you out,” she teased.

“I think I shut him down before it got that far, or rather Wes did!” Beverly said with a laugh. “Wes has always been protective of me and I think he wanted to impress Will so he was torn. I believe he told him that I didn’t talk to strange men or something, it was kind of funny actually.”

“Sounds like Will took it well enough. He really likes you and Wes. He actually came by to ask how he could help,” Deanna told her. 

“He did a good job tonight,” Beverly told her. “Wes wasn’t happy when I told him to join us for dinner. I have a feeling someone said something that upset him but I’ve not had a chance to talk to him yet. Will came by and made a point of saying how he was needed in Engineering tomorrow.” 

Deanna smiled. “If Wes needs to talk, I’m available.”

“Thank you. We’ll see where it goes. He knows about my relationship with Jean-Luc, although I’ve not told Susannah,” Beverly admitted. 

“How does he feel about it?” Deanna asked.

“Hmmm, hard to say. He says he just wants me to be happy. Mostly I think he would have said anything to stop talking about the issue,” Beverly allowed.

“I can’t imagine teenagers are too interested in discussing their parent’s love lives,” Deanna allowed. 

“He likes Jean-Luc, they get along well but we’ve been alone a long time,” Beverly said. “I didn’t really have time to date much between my career and the kids and there was never anyone I brought home so Wes hasn’t had to confront this before.”

“He is facing a lot of change - moving here, the truth of Susannah’s parentage, his responsibilities as an ensign, applying to the academy,” Deanna said. 

“His life has never been easy. People always think that being smart is a wonderful thing but really it can be isolating, especially as a child. Between that and being the kid whose dad died it has always been challenging. Actually, I think being here, being an ensign is about the happiest he has ever been. I hope I’m not jeopardizing that,” Beverly said with a sigh. 

“You can’t change the scenario,” Deanna said, “but you can keep the lines of communication open and support him as much as you can.”

“That is my plan. We talked about what might happen when this became public so I think he was as prepared as he could be,” Beverly said. “It doesn’t make it any easier when people are cruel or thoughtless though.”

“No, but having a loving and steady family and a support crew makes all the difference. We are all here for you, Beverly.”

“I know that. We’ve had more family here on the Enterprise in the last year than we ever have,” Beverly said. She drank the last sip of her wine and stood up. “I think I’m going to call it a night. Thank you for the support, it means a lot.”

CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS  
Jean-Luc was a bit irritated at Beverly’s insistence on keeping their relationship secret but he knew that if he pushed he might end up pushing her away. 

He decided to focus on making her feel secure in their relationship and that meant ceding control. After serving as a captain for so many years, that was easier said than done. Focusing on the immediate future, he washed up and changed from his uniform into a pair of sleep pants and a shirt. 

He had asked Wesley to add himself, Susannah and Beverly to the list of people who could enter without ringing the door chime so Beverly was able to let herself in when she arrived a few minutes later.

“Did you have a nice chat with Deanna?” he asked. 

“I did. She assured me that we have the support of the senior staff and she said most of the crew seems pleased or at least indifferent,” she told him. 

He nodded. “I did not like feeling as though I were being watched but overall it felt like it went well. One of the musicians told me she hoped my daughter enjoyed the music,” he said with a smile. 

“You really like it don’t you?” Beverly asked. “Being a father?”

“I do. I never would have thought it but now I can’t imagine what my life would be like without her, without all of you,” he said. 

“Children have that effect on us I suppose,” Beverly said. 

“My own family could be charitably described as dysfunctional but being part of a loving unit is a much different experience. My father was never satisfied with my performance, didn’t seem to even like me. My brother, Robert, and I fought all the time. It was an ugly competition, not simple sibling rivalry. I think I feared that I might be cold like my father, unable to connect with children,” he mused. 

“Is that why you didn’t want a family?” Beverly asked. “You said it was because you didn’t think you could do your duty as a Starfleet officer but now do you think it was more about your own upbringing?”

“Maybe,” he allowed. “It is all rather a moot point now. I have a family and I will do my best for you all. I really do want us to be a family, I want you to marry me,” he said, stroking her hand.

“I know and maybe one day I’ll be ready for that,” she said.

“Why is it so hard? We know each other better than you knew Jack. We’ve spent more time together, have more of a reason to make it work.” He said it without animosity but she realized that there was hurt underneath the question. 

“When I married Jack I was a medical student and he was a junior lieutenant. We weren’t really risking much. Now I have two children, a career as a doctor and a researcher, and you are the captain of the flagship of the Federation. The scenario is completely different. There is so much more to consider,” she said. She tempered her response by moving close to him and stroking his face. 

“I love you Beverly, I love the children. Whenever you are ready I will be here,” he told her. 

She nodded. “I’m working on it Jean-Luc but it is a big change and I want to make sure that when we take that step that I am confident in it and that we can make it work for the long-term. When I say yes, it really will be forever. So maybe we can consider it a ‘yes’ to saying yes in the future.”

Jean-Luc nodded and smiled. “For now, I suppose I can live with that.”

“For now, I have some other ideas,” Beverly said with a seductive smile. “The music was nice tonight, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, very pleasant. Data told me he is working in a few mistakes in order to make his playing more closely resemble that of humans.”

“Computer replay the music from tonight’s concert in Ten-Forward,” Beverly instructed. When it began to play, she held out her hand to Jean-Luc, “Dance with me.”

He rose and pulled her close. They mostly just held each other and swayed to the music. It was lovely and romantic. 

“You never changed out of your uniform,” he told her. 

“No, I didn’t want to go home before I came here. But...I’ll tell you a secret, what’s UNDER the uniform isn’t exactly regulation,” she said huskily. 

“Oh really?” he inquired with a wicked smile. He reached for the fastener but she stopped his hand. 

“Let me,” she told him. Beverly led him to the couch and gently pushed him to a sitting position at one end. She placed the toe of her boot on the couch next to him and slowly slid her hands down her leg and unzipped it. She tossed it aside and proceeded to pull off her sock. Her movements were slow and deliberate. He wouldn’t have thought one could do a striptease with a Starfleet uniform but she was proving him wrong. 

By the time she reached up for the fastener on her jumpsuit, he could feel himself growing hard in anticipation. As she slowly shimmied out of her uniform, he could see she was wearing a copper-colored lace teddy that was absolutely not regulation. He reached for her hungrily. 

Beverly looked into Jean-Luc’s eyes to see that they had darkened with desire. She lowered herself onto his lap, knees bent on either side of him, and brought her lips to his. Jean-Luc’s hands delved into her hair and pulled her close. She ran her hands down his back, kneading his muscles. 

Slowly he drew his left hand down the side of her body, brushing the sides of her breast and the rise of her hip. He began to nibble his way down her neck and she arched back to offer herself up. He came to the valley between her breasts and nuzzled the skin there, inhaling the lingering scent of her botanical soap. He brought both hands to her breasts and began to gently massage them, finally rubbing his thumbs over her nipples he felt them stiffen as she moaned. 

Wrapping his arms around her back he slid her over his lap and laid her down on the couch. He moved to cover her body with his and continued his downward trek. One hand moved between her legs, he pressed the base of his hand just over her public bone and began to stroke her outer folds with his fingers. The texture of the lace created delicious sensations against her dampening skin and her hips began to rock up into his hand. Finally, he moved lower and tugged the snaps open and sunk his fingers into her.

Jean-Luc looked up into her eyes while he moved his mouth down to kiss her belly and then moved lower still. He heard her sharp intake of breath as she realized his intent. His fingers stroked the sides of her thighs and he felt her legs trembling. She cried out when his lips made contact with her sex and moaned as he began to move his tongue around her outer and inner folds. When his tongue darted inside her she gripped the sides of the couch cushion to stabilize herself. Jean-Luc inserted his fingers inside and began to curl them against her as he moved his mouth up to suck her clit. He suckled it with slowly increasing pressure and delicately raked his teeth across the hood causing her to convulse in orgasm against him. He held her while she rode out the waves of ecstasy. Her head fell back and she let out a shaky breath. 

Jean-Luc slid back up her body and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. Tasting herself on them made her moan again. After several moments she brought a hand up to stroke his back and realized he was still clothed. She’d been so consumed with the sensations permeating her body that she had forgotten she was going to seduce him. 

Beverly opened her eyes and peered into the hazel orbs looking down at her. The look of satisfaction on Jean-Luc’s face told her he was quite pleased with himself, a sentiment she shared wholeheartedly. 

“That was...incredible,” she said, stretching. “What do you say we move to the actual bed and have a mutually satisfying second round?”

Rather than speaking, he kissed her passionately, stood up and took her by the hand to the bedroom. Beverly sat on the bed and drew the teddy up over her head. Jean-Luc stood between her legs as he removed his own shirt. She reached for his pants which were quickly discarded on the floor. Beverly reached out and palmed his erection, her fingers fluttering gently against his engorged skin. With a sly smile she leaned towards him and licked slowly up his penis, swirling her tongue along the top and consuming the bead of liquid that formed there. 

Jean-Luc climbed over her to lay on the bed and pulled her up beside him. He stroked her breast as he placed his lips on hers again. She sucked at his bottom lip and then thrust her tongue inside to mate with his. Desire rose in her again and she ran her hands along his hard chest, playing softly with his hair and then gently pinching his nipples. She felt his erection against her thigh and moved one hand down to stroke him.

Jean-Luc lowered his mouth and hands to her breasts and stroked them, moving from the sides slowly inwards at a maddeningly slow pace. Finally, he took one throbbing nipple into his mouth while he rolled the other between his thumb and index finger. He alternated back and forth, increasing the pressure and driving her wild. His right hand slid down to stroke between her legs and she was quickly ready for him again. 

Beverly pulled him on top of her, arching her body against his. She ran her hands down his back, feeling his bunched muscles. She grasped his toned buttocks and pulled him against her as she raised her hips, silently communicating what she wanted. 

His hands skimmed down her legs, grasping her ankles, gently drawing them up so her knees were bent, feet flat on the bed. He entered her in one deep motion and she cried out. Jean-Luc moved slowly, drawing himself almost all the way out before sliding back in. Beverly started to thrust up trying to increase the friction and the pace. He gave into her desire and soon they were both climbing to fulfillment. Beverly cried out his name as she felt the waves of her orgasm seize her. He thrust in and out a few more times and then surrendered to his own climax. 

He rolled to the side and pulled her up against him as their breathing and heart rates returned to normal. “I love you,” he whispered into her ear as he pulled her hair out of her face. 

She smiled and snuggled into his arms and allowed herself to doze off. When she awoke, she slithered out of bed, trying not to wake Jean-Luc. He was a light sleeper though and felt her leave. He rolled over and watched as she stumbled into the bathroom to clean up. When she came back he called for the lights so she could find her clothes and quietly watched her head into the living area to gather up the rest of her uniform.

Beverly came back in and kissed him gently. “Good night,” she said, stroking his face. “I love you too you know,” she whispered so quietly he almost didn’t hear. He smiled into the darkness as she departed. He could wait as long as she needed him to.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode Tag: Skin of Evil

SKIN OF EVIL  
BRIDGE  
Captain Picard had been monitoring the away team’s interactions with the creature which identified itself as Armus. After sounds of a scuffle and phaser fire it had become evident that Lt. Yar had been attacked. 

After receiving no response to his initial inquiry the Captain commanded forcefully, “Dr. Crusher report.”  
Staring at her tricorder in disbelief, Beverly spoke, “She’s dead.”

SICKBAY  
Picard joined Riker and Data in the vigil over their injured colleague. 

For a moment Riker saw the activity on the monitors and proclaimed his hope that she was saved but Dr. Crusher quickly quashed that notion, revealing that she was on life support. 

After attempting to jumpstart her brain with the neural stimulator Beverly finally announced, “She’s gone,” The frustration was evident in her voice. 

“Gone?” Picard queried, shocked. 

“There was too much synaptic damage. That thing just sucked the life right out of her. There’s nothing more that I can do,” the doctor said as she shook her head. 

OBSERVATION LOUNGE  
The officers were defending Yar’s actions and condemning Armus’s in an attempt to process what had happened. 

Captain Picard tapped on the table to get their attention. “Lt. Yar’s death is very painful for all of us. We will have to deal with it as best we can for now. Until the shuttle crew are safely beamed aboard this ship, our feelings will have to wait, is that understood?”

The statement was made to the group as a whole but Beverly read the additional meaning in it for her. Picard knew she would have to go back to the surface and he accepted it. Beverly made sure that he locked eyes with her as she nodded, acknowledging his concern and the rightness of his decision.

Lt. Worf, promoted to acting security chief elected to remain on the Enterprise, while Riker, Data, LaForge and Crusher prepared to return. 

VAGRA II  
After the away team failed to make progress with Armus, Picard decided to join them to try and end the stalemate.

Picard refused to entertain Armus who then seized control of Data’s arm and pointed his phaser at Picard. 

Armus seized on Beverly next. “One of you is going to die, Doctor and you are going to choose.” Beverly remained calm and locked eyes on Jean-Luc, silently awaiting her fate and praying inside that he would not blame himself or Data should Armus force Data to fire. 

“Then I choose myself,” she said, refusing to give in to this terrorism. 

“No, you are going to live. One of them dies,” Armus said as he moved Data’s arm around, changing the direction of the phaser. 

After ascertaining that Picard and the others would no longer amuse him, he finally spewed Commander Riker back out.

Beverly scanned Will and determined that all his life signs were normal and that he would be all right. 

Finally, Picard ordered the away team to beam back up to the Enterprise, remaining alone to deal with Armus and hopefully end this siege of the shuttlecraft. 

Once the away team was gone, Armus demanded that Picard provide him transportation from the planet. Picard acknowledged that he had the means to do so and finally he allowed Picard to enter the shuttle. Ben, the pilot, was seriously injured but alive and Deanna was ok. Picard told her that they could be beamed out if they could get Armus’s energy field low enough, something that happened when he was covering the shuttle and talking to her. She told him that when the creature’s rage was revealed, the energy field dropped. 

Onboard the Enterprise, Worf ordered Wesley to program the computer to beam up the shuttle crew and the captain as soon as the energy field dropped. 

Picard antagonised Armus, creating the opening they needed and they were beamed safely back on board. 

READY ROOM  
Picard returned to his ready room after the remembrance ceremony on the holodeck to find a message from Beverly on his terminal. It was simple but to the point. 

Come to dinner. Pack a bag to stay. Beverly

While he often stayed after the children went to bed so that they could be together, she had not allowed him to spend the night in her quarters, concerned with the impression that might give the children.

However, given how he pushed her away after she was injured on Minos, he theorized that this was her way of letting him know that wasn’t going to happen this time around. He had to respect her tenacity and honesty. He might be the captain but in their relationship, she was clearly not going to play second fiddle. Picard found that he was pleased that she would stand up for what she felt was right. 

He realized he was also a bit nervous about staying the night. While they had made love in her quarters after the children went to bed, he knew that being there in the morning might invite some discussion. He’d let Beverly take the lead since this was her idea. Given where he wanted their relationship to end up, he viewed this as a positive move.


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning....

CRUSHER QUARTERS  
The Crusher family was busy in the kitchen when Jean-Luc entered. He quickly deposited his bag in Beverly’s room and returned to the living area. Perhaps, they wouldn’t notice. 

That thought was quickly quashed. “You don’t usually come to dinner on Wednesday,” Susannah said. 

“No, but he’s welcome to come anytime,” Beverly told her. “And tonight we need to be together because we are mourning the loss of our friend.”

“Is that why Papa put a bag in your room? Is he staying here?” Susannah asked. 

“Yes,” her mother replied. 

“So it’s not so you can have sex?” Susannah asked. 

Picard choked on the tea Beverly had handed him. He stared questionly at her.

Beverly continued to look at Susannah, ignoring the eyes she felt boring into the back of her head. “Maybe we will, maybe we won’t. Sex is a way that adults in committed relationships connect and let each other know they care. It is also just good to be with the people that you love when something sad happens. You know you like me to hug you and sit with you when you’re upset. We find comfort in being with those we care about.”

Susannah nodded and walked back to the table. 

Picard continued to stare at Beverly. She walked over to him and bade him to follow her to the sofa. “Breathe, Jean-Luc,” she told him. 

“She’s not even 9 years old Beverly, what does she know about sex?”

“Jean-Luc, her mother is a doctor and she figured out how animals reproduce almost as soon as she could read, which was early. She knows the basic biology and I’ve tried to teach them that sex is serious but not something to be embarrassed about. It’s not like I gave her the Kama Sutra.” Picard’s forehead remained creased with his eyebrows drawn together. He was still unsure about this.

“You had a different attitude when I was concerned about Wesley knowing about us,” she pointed out. “Or you conveniently didn’t care because you had more immediate concerns,” she said with a lascivious look. 

“He’s 15,” Picard retorted. 

“And he’s male,” Beverly pointed out. 

“That had nothing to do with it,” he insisted.

Beverly only raised her eyebrows in response. “I can’t wait until she’s a teenager,” She said with a smile. 

“Do I dare ask what you were like as a teenager?” he queried, afraid he already knew the answer. 

“Well, you already know I like older men…” she let her voice trail off and wiggled her hips as she walked over to join the kids in the kitchen. 

Picard rubbed both his hands up his face, across his bald pate and sighed. These women….if only he didn’t love them so much. 

Beverly smiled softly. She’d hoped this would ease his heart, really all their hearts, but she knew the burden of command made his especially heavy, and they seemed to be off to a good start. 

Picard made his way to the table and Wesley gave him a lopsided smile as he passed him the tea his mother had ordered. Jean-Luc supposed that smile was Wes’s way of accepting his presence and what it meant. He clasped a hand on Wes’s shoulder and nodded at him. In the eternal way of men they silently agreed that each was doing the best to accept the situation because of the woman who was so important in both their lives. 

BEVERLY’S BEDROOM  
“Why does this suddenly seem awkward?” he wondered in a quiet voice. He almost felt like he had to whisper. He had put on his gray sleep pants after they’d both brushed their teeth. 

“What do you mean?” Beverly asked. She was rubbing lotion into her hands, having donned an emerald green silk nightgown. Her face was scrubbed clean of make-up and her hair shone from her brushing it. 

“I don’t know. Maybe because I’m staying the night and they KNOW I’m spending the night…” his voice trailed off helplessly.

“So it was less awkward when we were hiding it from the kids? And you’re the one who wants to live together,” she teased. “Can’t imagine how you’ll feel when the whole crew knows.” 

“Point taken,” he allowed. He felt a bit foolish when she put it like that but somehow instead of feeling like the parent he felt like a teen who had snuck a girl into his bedroom. 

Beverly sat on the bed and leaned over and kissed him. “It’s like I told Susannah, we don’t have to have sex but we aren’t going to be alone,” she placed her hand on his cheek and smiled. 

“Computer, lights out,” she called as they both slipped beneath the sheets. The cabin was plunged into darkness with only the softest glow coming from the starfield beyond the window. 

Their hands met in the middle of the bed and Beverly rolled towards him and into his open arms. She laid her head on his chest and shoulder. 

Picard’s emotions washed over him. Grief for the loss of Tasha, the fear he had felt when Data’s phaser had been trained on Beverly, when she had bravely declared that she would die rather than choose a fellow officer, the intimacy of being here in these quarters with his family, fully accepted. He closed his eyes, not in exhaustion but in order to regain control. Beverly’s hand lay on his chest, her fingertips lightly moving back and forth in a soothing motion. He picked up her hand and kissed the tips of her fingers. 

She softly moved to kiss his lips even as a tear slid down her cheek. “She was so young,” she whispered. 

He nodded, “Her death was so senseless.”

“She was doing what she loved, protecting and serving,” Beverly said. “You and I both know far too well that we aren’t even promised that in life. She was proud of the work she did.” 

“It never gets easier, crew deaths under my command,” he told her. 

“I don’t think they ever will. I don’t think you would really want them to,” she told him. “That’s your humanity, you can't suppress it.”

“I don’t know if it’s better or worse that she doesn’t have any family,” Picard mused. 

“Starfleet was her family, we were,” Beverly told him. “And she would want us to remember the good things about her and her life.” Beverly kissed him again and this time he kissed her back. 

Their lovemaking was slow and languid, taking comfort in each other’s touch and reaffirming their continuing life in the face of grief. They cleaned up and climbed back in bed. Beverly laid down in his warm embrace and they drifted off quietly together. 

MORNING  
There was no sun rising through the window to indicate the hour so Picard looked around for the chronometer when he awoke. It was just after 0500. Thankfully, there was no school today, Beverly was off and he had an afternoon shift today. Beverly was warm and still curled against his side. 

He relaxed again back against her and let his thoughts drift. Being in bed with Beverly, there was really only one direction those thoughts were likely to go. Her hair, laying over his chest and on the pillows, was irresistible to him and he started to toy with the fiery strands. 

Jean-Luc felt her beginning to stir next to him and almost groaned when she arched her back and stretched. Her satin nightgown, which was knee length when she was standing, had ridden up, and when she moved it crept to the tops of her deliciously rounded butt cheeks. He reached out a hand and slid it up her bare thigh. Beverly’s eyes flew open at his touch. She leaned back against him in the invitation. 

He caressed her ass with a firm hand. She wore nothing underneath the gown. He licked the tips of his fingers and his seeking digits quickly slipped between her folds, parting her gently and stroking her until he felt her own moisture begin to seep down. Her increased breathing indicating her building arousal. 

Picard quickly discarded his sleep shorts and moved her knees to a 90-degree angle and got on his knees behind her. He nudged her top leg forward just a bit. Reaching down he used one hand to open her to him and the other to guide his hardened member into her. She groaned softly and arched against him. 

Jean-Luc’s hand nudged her nightgown up, slid over her the crest of her hip, and stroked her clitoris as he slid his member in and out of her. Beverly moaned as the pressure built. She bucked up, allowing him deeper access. They rocked together, enjoying the sensations of their joined flesh as they strained towards orgasm. 

“That’s one incredible good morning Jean-Luc,” she purred. 

He gave a low, deep laugh that was incredibly sexy. Beverly’s heart lightened at the sound. She kissed him gently and snuggled back down to get a little more sleep. 

0700  
Picard woke, pulled on his sleep pants and a robe and quietly exited the bedroom, not wanting to wake Beverly. He found Wesley already at the table with a bowl of cereal and a PADD. 

Susannah was at the replicator, ordering herself a glass of juice and scrambled eggs with cheese. She glanced up at him, “Where’s Mom?”

“She’s still asleep and I wanted to let her rest as I know she had a very busy week,” he told her. 

Susannah studied him. “Did you like staying here all night?” she asked. 

Picard heard Wesley suppress a chuckle. “Yes,” he answered, deciding to keep things simple. 

“Do you think Mom did too?” This time a strangled laugh emerged from Wes who was now staring very intently at his PADD and avoiding any chance at eye contact with the captain. 

“I hope so,” Picard said slowly, thinking that maybe he should wake Beverly after all. This was worse than negotiating with a Romulan. He never knew what his daughter might say or do next.

“Good,” she proclaimed. “If she likes it maybe she will let you be here more often and live with us.”

So that’s what this was about. Picard knew that this was her way of telling him what she wanted. He sat down in a chair next to her and covered her hand with his. “Susannah, I love being here with you and your mother and your brother,” he told her.

“Susannah scooted over and climbed into his lap. “I wish you could be here all the time,” she said.

“I know, sweetheart,” he said stroking her hair. “Would you like to come to my quarters for dinner one night this week?”

“All of us?” she asked, studying him. 

“How about just you and me? This time at least,” he proposed. 

“Mom said she’s not ready for you to live with us,” Susannah told him.  
Picard sighed. “I know it seems complicated Susannah but I love you and I’m not going anywhere.” He kissed the top of her head and she moved back to eat her breakfast. He stood up and ordered himself tea and a croissant. 

As he was sitting down, Beverly emerged from the bedroom. She had belted a long robe over her nightgown but her hair was still tousled from sleep. He thought she was as stunning as she had ever been at a formal event. He smiled at her over the heads of the children. 

“Good morning,” she said. As she walked by, she laid a quick hand on Wes’s shoulder and then ruffled Susannah’s hair. Picard envied her that. Those gentle, simple touches came so easy to her. He was sure she would be surprised if he commented on it as it was just part of who she was. Until she came back into his life, he hadn’t realized how long he went without being touched. As she got to him, she leaned down and kissed him softly on the temple and trailed her fingers along his shoulders. 

Picard couldn’t even remember the last time he had breakfast with family, and though the thought made him sad, it also made him appreciate this time all the more.


End file.
